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Urgent Advice Needed On Mil Badmouthing Me In Front Of Husband Behind My Back

Discussion in 'Relationship With In-Laws' started by Goahead, Mar 19, 2020.

  1. Goahead

    Goahead Silver IL'ite

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    Thank you ladies ..I kept quiet on this and let it go (as usual)
    but i have started to feel hate towards m inlaws family in 15 years as this is not the first time when they disrespect me indirectly.I actually feel that it will be better if they come straight and make it explicit that they dnt care for me. i'm not able to play the double standard game with MIL/SIL and i feel that i always loose...they come out as very nice people in front of everyone including husband and only i know what they are doing to me behind my back.

    i have also started to feel hate towards my husband as i feel he has allowed this to happen for years . Some of the times, he is just ignorant and do not know but most of the time he chose to be ignorant , keep quiet ,let it go and hide it from me and even try to save their back.Because of his behavior , they have been so openly playing this game with me fiercly. My MIL knows that she will have no consequence and will come out victorious no matter what .., same goes for my sil
    in all this situation i have started to judge my husband a lot now. I see how he behaves towards my family members versus his . For almost like 12-13 years , i never had this comparison in mind. I would actually maintain a good relationship with his extended family as well. Now i have started to feel that why should I , if he doesnt care about my family and not even understand my point of view when it comes to my MIL and SIL

    I feel that i have been keeping quiet for everything now and is just letting a lot of things go.In this entire thing, i'm loosing my respect and trust for him as well. I dnt share my family with his and do not want him to share his with me. i have no idea as how to control this tera - mera family scenario and become one family and keep his sister as other family...it feels like even for his sister, i cannot say anything as she is his family
    lot of you will advice me to have a good relationship with husband and have trust etc but everything else is fine in our relationship. the problem happens only when its his sister or parents .He acts foolish and is overly concerned for them to an extent that he just ignored me and mine feelings. Noting matters to him when it comes to them.he just quietly ignores everything
     
  2. lukywife

    lukywife Gold IL'ite

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    Few inputs for your peace
    1. Never listen to mils conversation with anyone. Mils are stupids, why listen to their crap? They try to make snide remarks with the intention to hurt you, so don’t listen at all. It will keep you sane.
    2. If she makes snide remarks to you or tells she spoke to your mom, tell her “yeah mom told she called you.” Just be straightforward instead of angry infront of drama queens, they are cowards.
     

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