Upset By A Book I Finished Reading, Broken By Shy Keenan

Discussion in 'General Discussions' started by SuiDhaaga, Feb 13, 2023.

  1. SGBV

    SGBV IL Hall of Fame

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    I am a strong believer of God, and I have experienced the presence of God in my life. Whenever I called God or cried for help, the God did not come directly, but sent someone out of nowhere to be with me. So, I am wired to believe in God eventually helped me to accept God in everything I see.

    God did not promise us a life free from pain. Pain is part of human life, and no one can escape from this. However, having God's presence can ease the pain, and help you face the trouble or come out of it.

    I can share with you a couple of incidents to explain how God works!

    Many years back, when I was studying in Colombo, (Sri Lanka), I decided to go back to my hometown following a long holidays.
    As usual I went to the bus station in the noon, assuming the bus will start shortly. But due to a bomb blast in Colombo the government imposed a curfew, which resulted cancelling all the transportation facilities with immediate effect.
    A few passengers like me were stranded in the bus station without being able to go back to our hostel accommodation in the city or to our home town.
    Someone told me that I should wait, and the government will send at least one bus to our city before dark. So, I waited.
    It was 6pm and there was no sign of a bus coming there.

    Apart from a few elderly people, there were no passengers waiting there. I was just 20 years old, and everyone looked rowdies in the bus station. Perhaps they were, because those bus drivers and cleaners used to drink alcohol at nights, especially when they know that they are not driving.
    I started panicking, called parents and neither of us could do anything at that time except praying to God.

    In no time, I saw a man appearing there. He asked whether I came with anyone? I replied No.
    He then stayed with me in the bus station during the next 2-3 hours until a bus came. There were only 5 people inside the bus, all unrelated to each other siting in different corners. This man sat behind me.

    The bus took another 5 hours to reach my home town, where my dad was restlessly awaiting for my arrival in the bus station.
    This man handed me to my dad and said he felt like coming with me in the bus as it was unsafe for a young gir to travel alone.
    He then waited in the bus station to go back to Colombo. That's when we realized this person came all the way to our city, just to safeguard me.
    It was during 2002, and those were the times we did have mobile phones, leave alone FB or whatsapp for that matter.
    For me, that is God!

    Contrastingly, my uncle's family went through a difficult situation back in the 90s when Sri Lanka was burning due to war. His wife's FOO was living in Australia, and they offered to help him by various means to get out of the mess.
    They initially sent a family member to Sri Lanka, who was prepared to take my uncle's wife and kids to Australia under refugee program. The idea was that uncle will join them later.
    But my uncle refused this.
    Later one of our relative offered to sponsor my uncle on a tourist visa, and he had all the good means to claim refugee status in UK that time, which will result in taking his entire family to the UK. He refused this too.

    He waited for some arrangements to take his entire family to abroad, but not prepared to be separated despite of the tragic situation on ground.

    There were several agents, that appeared genuine and sent a lot of families on refugee visa that time. My uncle's relatives were ready to bear the expenses. Moreover, he had properties that could have been used for sponsorship. But he didn't make any decisions, yet waited till God comes to him with protection.

    Then a bomb blast happened, and his wife and two sons were killed in that. He survived with physical disability. It was tragic, and he started scolding God for the pain he was going through.

    God will not come in person to answer your prayers. He will give you the wisdom, the support, the solutions to your problems. It is in your hand to decide whether to take the offer or leave it.

    I had the option to chase that unknown man out of the scene or move away from him and travel alone. Had I travelled alone, my destiny would have been different.
    I chose to follow my gut feeling. That's God's guidance to me.

    My uncle had the option to accept one of those offers to get out of the war throne country back then. But he chose to stay, awaiting a better option. Had he accepted those offers, he would have been living in the UK or Australia with family now.
     
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  2. Viswamitra

    Viswamitra IL Hall of Fame

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    It is the mind that increases the faith in God when we need help from an unknown source and it is the same mind that decreases faith as well especially after an adversity. Most importantly, when we are happy about what life brings to us, it is all our achievements and God is worshiped only to prove to the world that we are part of the society believing in God. "Deivam Manusha Rupine" meaning "God expresses Himself in human form". We must be ready to accept the help whatever source from which it comes from and continue to seek help until we find an answer. It doesn't have to be people who our mind trusts or who we believe who has the ability to help.

    We all know Prahalatha's story where his father became most powerful and feared individual in the world. Even Devas were afraid of him. But his son Prahalatha recited Lord Narayana's name all the time despite his father Hirayakasibu warning him not to repeat the name of Lord Krishna. Despite the child being punished so many times, he kept his faith in tact. Eventually, Lord Narayana came as Narasimha (half lion and half man) to kill Hiranyakasibu.

    But this is Kaliyuga and God doesn't appear with all His Glory as men has little faith. But God extends His helping hand to those who believe in him and even to those who conduct an ideal and purposeful life (right-living), even if they don't believe in God.

    It is painful to know what happened to Shy and it is even more painful when all those she depended on for help, didn't understand her. Despite all that, her determination to continue her life is such a great self-confidence. Self-confidence is high when one believes in consciousness. Their intellect leads them towards their consciousness.
     
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  3. SuiDhaaga

    SuiDhaaga IL Hall of Fame

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    I feel sad for what you suffered through.

    I am happy that God sent you your savior whome you ended up marrying.

    I am still horrified by what you must have gone through.

    people look like angels but they can be devils.

    There are lo5 of things running through my mind right now


    I am happy you got light at the end of the tunnel.

    was this uncle ever caught, ever punished?
     
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  4. SuiDhaaga

    SuiDhaaga IL Hall of Fame

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    It seems we are all blindfolded and dint know when we will stumble off a plank.

    we can thank God for every uneventful step.
     
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  5. Laks09

    Laks09 Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    My faith always comes down three notches when someone asks this question. People try to find positives - she found her strength, she got out, got a life line - try to explain that all of those are God’s way of helping. I would say putting a little child through sexual abuse and then providing a life line by a way of strength she finds within or in people around should not be his way. I don’t think very young kids come out of it unscathed either. They deal with a life time of trauma, PTSD, anxiety and other issues. It’s absolutely unfair.
    It’s ok to ask these questions. Sometimes we may not get the answers we seek or closure but it’s ok. What you are feeling is very normal. We often live in a safety net and these kind of books or articles shake us up. I hope you find peace in knowing the author has found some semblance of peace. Maybe writing the book was cathartic for her. Hugs and hang in there!
     
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  6. iyerviji

    iyerviji Finest Post Winner

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    What you have mentioned is very true
    After coming to Vaikom and after my husband's death I am experiencing how God is helping me through.someone when I need. Now I am able to.spend with God from 6.30 am to 10.30 am doing everything for him,doing archana etc.Goingbto temple morning and evening. Thanks to God He has brought me to safe place and spending my time religiously 20230216_102754.jpg
     
  7. iyerviji

    iyerviji Finest Post Winner

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    Feel very sorry.hearing your story . Glad that there was that guy to help.you and marry.you.He is a great person.
     
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  8. Thyagarajan

    Thyagarajan IL Hall of Fame

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    In a nutshell I must say that Almighty would never appear straightaway but send clues or hints th through his agents that includes animals and birds.
    My family toddler son & I were saved by God read how in the link
    Son , Spouse & Rage Of Diesel
    A minute after my alighting with old couple, Entire double decker that was with driver and conductor one passenger was about to board got electrocuted . Why and how Almighty saved the old couple and I? Account in link
    An Old Couple & I - In Shocking Sojourn
    A mouse saved my life from exploding aircraft.
    Tight Schedule- Spouse, Rat & 'craft
    There are few more links where the handy work of God saved me or my family through His Agent. He need not Himself appear in a different robe like Narasimmha but would send succour to save modern prahalahads.
     
  9. SuiDhaaga

    SuiDhaaga IL Hall of Fame

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    Thank you for this explanation.

    This book shook so many people to their core

    We complain that life is boring, yadda yadda yadda, but we never count our blessings

    There is more of God to go around for all of us.

    God is not zero-sum, we can all shine in His Blessing,


    That is why I am so upset at what happened to Shy and no one helped her.

    As children lot of us are scared of dark, scared of monsters, etc

    These rapists are the monsters to be feared, and adults turned a blind eye. Lot of them even blamed Shy. Shy stayed with elderly couple when CPS determined the rapes were her fault.

    First the elderly lady slapped 9 year old Shy around and told her she must bathe in a stream with her clothes on instead of their bathroom.

    Eventually the elderly lady and her retired Priest husband realized maybe Shy is not at fault. However, Shy was told she must control the rapist and make him less tempted.

    I don't know who is bigger monster, the rapists or the enablers.

    Now as an adult Shy faces another set of traumas, i.e. her son took his life due to anti-homos in his school.
     
    Last edited: Feb 17, 2023
  10. lakshmi888

    lakshmi888 Silver IL'ite

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    @SGBV

    I don’t agree with you that had your uncle gone out of country, his fate would have been different

    @ SGBV - what would you tell to the old Indian man who got paralyzed for life because of a racist cop and what would you tell to the family of the Indian man shot down by a racist man .. would you still say that They should have moved to a western country ???

    I don’t know if you are aware of the problems of racism, gun violence, gang violence in countries like US, Canada ,Australia.. there are even desi gangs just like non desi gangs in Canada and they are notorious .

    In Australia , racism against brown folks is a HuGe problem .. haven’t you heard of all those stories ..,

    There is a famous saying I have heard that if ones fate is to die by drowning, they won’t die by hanging ..

    Subtle or in the face racism is rampant in many western countries .. desis born & raised in western countries look brown and are asked every now & then - ‘ where you come from ‘ - even when they were born here and grow into adults in this country …if they don’t look black or white, they are asked this question by many black , white folks , even their peers and colleagues .. when they say they were born here , the question still goes on but where are your parents from. ????

    Even many People choose doctors from ethnicities they feel comfortable with unless there are no options ..,

    even some desi doctors treat others desis very unprofessionally too .. I personally stopped going to desi doctor after horrible experience with desi doctor ..,

    every country has its own issues .. drug problem and depression and bullying problem is huge in western countries

    Also, I believe time of death is written in advance, as per karma theory and even if your uncles son died in Sri Lanka, if it was his time, if he were in Australia or US or Canada, who knows he might have been a victim of gun violence or racism violence like A brown desi software engineer was gunned down by a racist man in America..

    an old Indian man visiting his son in America got paralyzed as he was thrown down by a racist cop after a non desi neighbor reported this old man as suspicious person in the neighborhood!!!..

    the racist cop got fired from that city’s police force but joined a different city’s police force but the poor brown old man is paralyzed for life !! This was a very clear case of racism .,

    Not everything is sunny and roses in western countries.. there is subtle or in the face racism in many walks of life …

    gun violence is very high in America …,Canada & Australia have huge gang problem …..Canada is famous for gang culture ….many Indian and Sri Lankan origin men end up joining gangs in their youth for good quick money.. they learn about it from their fellow friends …

    . I don’t think you are aware of it … Indians staying for years in Canada know about gang culture and how so many desi men there are into gangs ….

    some young men in western countries will mob for just 20 dollars for their drug fix of the day …

    But to some people who are not that aware of world happenings , grass always looks greener on the other side..

    personally, i moved to America on my own as a single woman because a man in my home town harassed me for years and police wasn’t helping me much as police in india looks the other way if the culprit is well connected or related to a politician !!!

    Otherwise, I was like your uncle and very happy in india till one man started harassing me and would not stop harassment for years but he escalated his harassment and would say courts and police can’t do much to him and literally, police and courts didn’t help me much from the harassment from this man who harassed me for years !!

    I would say Every country has its own problems
     
    Last edited: Feb 17, 2023
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