Universal Love

[JUSTIFY]Archana wrote a wonderful post “Love is all you need” and excellently articulated how the word “Love” is misused/misunderstood and how people make marital status as a social necessity. Is love a component that our mind experiences from time to time or is it one of the characteristics of our divine consciousness? When I wrote a post named “Alignment”, VJ Bunny asked me a question, “I understand that one should stop feeling love as they advance in sadhana, as love is one thing that triggers attachment. I am sure love we speak in mundane language is different from spiritual. Some say love is God and then why should we shun love?” I have nothing but admiration for her as this question shows how deep she is in her self-inquiry. Even though I am not at all qualified to answer her question, I attempted an answer to the best of my ability thinking that it would be a great exercise for my spiritual development as well. I am not sure whether many had a chance to read it and therefore, I am reproducing it below.

It is difficult to define love and certainly my knowledge to define love is very limited. However, I can share what I have learned as difference between worldly love and eternal (unconditional) love. Worldly love is one that we experience with our nearest and dearest, country, homeland, society and culture, possessions and the love of living things or nature. 'Worldly' love is the attraction to - or deep respect for - anything in one’s earthly life to which one is personally attached. It is therefore said to be ‘conditional love’ which means not absolute, undying love but love dependent on the fulfillment of at least some conditions. Worldly love’ is regarded as lower than ‘spiritual love’, being seen as ‘mere’ carnal love, temporal, impure or tainted by desires for selfish satisfaction. This love is felt by our senses and mind based on how we feel attached to beings or things that we have around. Self-love is also often looked down upon as of the lowest kind, overlooking the fact that in real life some forms of 'love' of oneself are unavoidable and a necessary prerequisite for a healthy outlook, self-respect and positive self-expression. There is a fine line between self-respect needed to carry out our duties Vs indispensable attachment to our thoughts resulting in Ego. All of them are sometimes called "affection" or "attachment".

On the contrary, we have an inherent quality of love as part of our divine and supreme Self. This is universal and is not based on how we are attached to the fellow beings or things. It is also called "Universal Love" or "Unconditional Love". It is like a sprinkler that could start once we make a sincere effort to unlock the restrain. For example, Mother Teresa watching the sufferings of human beings due to leprosy, decided to stay in Calcutta and continued to serve the poor people in need. That is unconditional love with no strings attached.

In Sanatana Dharma, in different stages of life, people are supposed to dutifully love the people who they are associated with. In Brahmacharya, one needs to saturate their love to Guru. In Grahastha stage, one needs to saturate the love for the family. Vanaprastha is the stage in which one needs to practice austerities, detach themselves from transient things and desires and should begin his love for seeking knowledge. At this point, one should establish Universal love for all fellow beings and focus on giving as much as possible. Lastly, one should reach the Sanyasa stage where one is focused on loving the Universal Absolute and nothing else.

In simple terms, any love that is towards transient things is conditional and it is not actual love. The love that is permanent is Universal love. When a person reaches the stage of self-realization, his/her dependency in the world reaches the stage of zero, there are no desires or attachments, pleasure and pain are equal, experience universal love for everyone and everything and all are equal and so on. Love is an essential element for living our life. For example, if we wish to do an action skillfully, we need to saturate our love for that action to be extremely effective. Love is the denominator for everything. Love in thoughts is Truth, Love in feelings is Peace, Love in actions is Righteousness and Love in understanding is Non-violence. Our divine entity has all these five values known as Sathya, Dharma, Shanti, Prema and Ahimsa.

When we reach (Self-realization) Samadhi stage after going through the steps of concentration, contemplation and meditation stage, there is nothing to love as we experience that the one who loves and one being loved are one and the same. We experience love when we go through the three stages. Bhakthi Yoga is saturation of love for the Supreme Universal Absolute. Gnana Yoga is saturation of love for the knowledge and Karma Yoga is saturation of love for the actions.
[/JUSTIFY]

 

Dear GG,

Please don't take my appreciation of your two liner responses as restriction to express yourself in larger paragraphs. While I enjoy the quality others possess which I don't have, I also like someone who respond in detail as I identify myself with such a person. The fact that you responded to my post makes me happy whatever is the shape or form of your response. Certainly, my intention is not to send you on a one-way ticket to relish Universal Love and wander in a la-la land. We all delve always in worldly love/attachment and I am glad you came back with worldly love/attachment to respond to my post.

My intention is to understand true unconditional and universal love and contrast it with temporal, conditional and worldly love otherwise known as attachment. Anyone who helps me understand it better, I welcome it. While worldly love is dutiful and is needed for us to do our actions in the world, I am only questioning whether it is transient or permanent in nature. There has to be reason why Sanatana Dharma defined four Purusharthas known as Dharma, Artha, Kama and Moksha. Each step before Moksha perhaps is a means to an end and not an end in itself. The question we have to ask ourselves is whether we can relinquish them without relinquishing the attachment? How good is our relinquishing wealth without our attachment to wealth being relinquished?

At some point in time, everything we have felt using our mind disappears whether it is worldly love/attachment or otherwise as mind in itself will disappear when we become our divine consciousness. The mind is an entity that is created by our cobweb of desires and attachments and once all of them disappear, there is no mind. If true universal unconditional love is part of the divine consciousness, it is certainly above our mind. We can't comprehend it with our mind but can feel it with our divine consciousness. Everything associated with divine consciousness is permanent in nature and last forever. For example, the pleasure we derive in our day to day life is transient as it last only up to the time we get a pain. On the contrary, the Bliss that our divine consciousness has is permanent and everlasting. The day we derive satisfaction in loving every fellow being around us the same way we love our own kith and kin, it is a big transformation towards our spiritual progress.

My sincerely apologies if the words above are more confusing. It is difficult to define love as it is beyond the scope of my mind. I am also struggling as I am limited to define it only through the sublime effort of learned people. I need to feel it to express myself and I am far from it.

Viswa

 

Dear Padmini,

Thank you for your kind words. I am just overwhelmed by what you have eloquently articulated in a paragraph about love. It is a very interesting analogy that Universal love is an elevator whereas personal love is the stairway to that elevator that takes us to heaven. You have answered my question in a way. When I wrote a response to GG, I asked there has to be a reason why the four Prusharthas are suggested in that order. May be they are a trial before experiencing real Universal love like what cricketers call as net practice with their own teammates before they go to the field to play against an international team.

It is true that many times our love lacks passion. A true love will be elevating not only to the giver but also the one who experiences such a love. I totally agree with you that love when it manifests in full form, it is difficult to be contained. Your other expression "we rise in love as opposed to falling in love" is a very powerful message. It is my opinion that Universal Love is an ocean and our personal, conditional love is a river and it eventually will merge with the ocean. The worldly love we have is something we experience with our mind whereas the Universal Love is something we experience with our divine consciousness (spiritual heart). The traits like humility, gratitude, sacrifice, compassion, etc. leads to Universal Love of fellow beings.

What a question you asked at the end? "Real love is the essence of what you want and what you seek. Is it not?" I could not find a better question than that to feed into my constant desire to inquire what is Universal Love. This question of yours reminded me about my Guru's statement, "I give you what you want so that you will seek what I want to give you". If I learn to differentiate between what I want and what I seek, I will be able to find the difference between temporal love and true Universal Love. I was reading a book of teachings of Sri Nisargadatta Maharaj named, "I AM THAT" in which the Maharaj says, "Before we find who we are, let us keep eliminating who we are not. This is the best way to find who we really are". I think the true and unsullied Universal Love can be felt when we keep experiencing what is not real. When we learn to love our own kith and kin unconditionally from our heart with no expectations, it would be a stepping stone for us to experience what is Universal Love.

Viswa

 

Dear Sabitha,

I agree with you that the Lord alone can show Universal Love but I would like to add "on a consistent basis" to your statement. Archana explained that she was in tears when a taxi driver gave her paper towels out of his glove compartment when he saw her wet and shivering from the rain. This is nothing but experiencing Universal Love. You have also beautifully explained how you feel when you look at the babies and young children and that is feeling of Universal Love inside of you.

I like your approach of taking baby steps. Many times, I hear from people that it is difficult to do and when they do, they are not convincing me that the Universal Love is impossible but telling their own mind not to look for it or show it. It is always my view that we need to have a conviction that the Universal Love is possible to experience and if it is possible to experience it momentarily, we can work on extending it for a prolonged period of time.

I feel that the Universal Love is above my mind and that is the reason why the mind does not recognize it as much as I wish. Conditional love is the feeling of my mind whereas the Universal Love is the feeling of my divine consciousness. That is also the reason why my mind does not allow me to prolong that Universal Love.

I have experienced that when I delve in the beauty of the Universal and expansive Love, it is my mind that brings me back to the real world. I also struggle a lot to prolong that feeling as my mind is adamant to bring me back to the real life. I can't put a "Don't disturb" sign to my mind. Of late, I am beginning to feel that I have to trick my mind to participate in that Universal Love that I experience and make it understand that it is a unique experience. I know that the one that is known for its fickleness is also a great observant. If we train it to concentrate and experience Universal Love, it will become addicted to it. After all, the restless mind is looking for rest every night and if we train it to look for expansive Universal Love, it becomes a relaxation to my mind in waking state. I don't articulate my thoughts as well as you and Cheeniya Sir and sometimes, it might be confusing to understand what I was trying to communicate.

I don't believe I have enough knowledge to conquer the mind but I am merely sharing some of my experiments with you which you may or may not find it useful. I am also eager to learn from you about your experiences.

Viswa

 

Dear BharadjwajThiru,

Thank you for reading this post and responding to it. I will definitely read your post and respond to it. I was pleasantly surprised to know that you are son of Mrs. Srinivasan who I revere the most.

Viswa