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Understanding the emotional needs - Part 1

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by Chitvish, Feb 18, 2008.

  1. Chitvish

    Chitvish Moderator IL Hall of Fame

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    I am sure you have read it when I posted this in V R's forum.
    Let me also tell you, unconditional love needs a lot of understanding, less of ego, a little bit of sacrifice, too!
    love,
    Chithra.
     
  2. Chitvish

    Chitvish Moderator IL Hall of Fame

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    We need to give eachother space, to give freedom to the other without any mistrust creeping in ,besides other things. For our generation, some rules were laid for us - we followed them without questioning. But still, we were not less happy, in any way !
    Love,
    Chithra.
     
  3. srivatsa

    srivatsa New IL'ite

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    Whatever we write like compromise, giving space, unconditional love etc etc., many things are very difficult when it comes to implementation phase. But its true that Our Indian culture has given has a great strength in trying out and implementing all the above said as we still repect the commitment we have accepted for lifetime and most of the time we love and enjoy the commitment of marriage.

    Regards
    Sri
     
  4. sudhavnarasimhan

    sudhavnarasimhan Silver IL'ite

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    Dear Chithra,
    Another good blog, on a NEVER CAN ONE UNDERSTAND topic!

    True that over the years you learn to adapt, adjust, give in give out and Grow together.
    But i wishsomeone educates the younger generation That to HOLD ON LONGER TO THIS MARRIAGE BUS/TRAIN/PLANE is the Criteria necessary to the survival of it and the so called understanding of all needs sets in! After all PAZHAM PAZHUKKA vendama! Big Laugh

    Anyway then it will be too late to part and we get used to our Dependent better halves and
    ALL'S WELL THAT ENDS WELL!

    (Ha ha .....i think i am feeling alright....i can see my sense of humour and sarcasm peeping out....)
     
  5. sunkan

    sunkan Gold IL'ite

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    dear chithra,
    you have proved here that every man and woman have a yes and no in every thing we agree to disagree in the end keeping space, now that is married life..sunkan
     
  6. mkthpavi

    mkthpavi Senior IL'ite

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    Dear Chithra..

    How true :) Any relationship - be it marital or official or familial - is all about loving the person and respecting the relationship, despite the differences. And it is upto both individuals involved to make or break it :) No matter what our elders / society says, ultimately the big responsibility of managing the marriage is left with the individuals ONLY. How much can parents or siblings or close friends do? And the rest of the society will only mock / taunt ..less said the better about them :)
    Yes...marriage can turn into the most loved relationship or the worst relationship on earth :) It is so intense and deep !!

    Love
    Pavithra
     
  7. Chitvish

    Chitvish Moderator IL Hall of Fame

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    ultimately, only we stand to gain in life ! All said & done, this is one relationship we will never take for granted.Our(my) generation had no choice & adjusted more because of our "conditioning".But I do not think, we have any regret at all. We questioned less, accepted more ! As you say, our culture stresses this bond so sacred, so much that we do not think twice whether it is worth it.
    Love,
    Chithra.
     
  8. Chitvish

    Chitvish Moderator IL Hall of Fame

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    fit as a fiddle, Sudha !
    We can only set an example at home to the younger generation; beyond that there is no way, we can help.It is sad when they think that we did adjust under pressure. I think what we gained in life is so much, including a secure home for our children.
    Perhaps, your better half is dependent on you? Here, I am more dependant on mine ! I need him around, for my very survival after all these years!
    Love,
    Chithra.
     
  9. Chitvish

    Chitvish Moderator IL Hall of Fame

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    It is just like 2 sides of a coin.Whether we agree to disagree or disagree to agree, we do not lose, but only gain in our married life.
    Thanks for joing us, Sunkan.
    Love,
    Chithra.
     
  10. Chitvish

    Chitvish Moderator IL Hall of Fame

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    you have summed it up so beautifully.
    We need them, we love them, but we cannot be without fighting or arguing with them !
    Love,
    Chithra.
     

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