Toddler Sleeping Very Late At Night

sanjuruby3 · Dec 1, 2016

Hi ll,
my 2.5 yrs old girl is super active and draining us out energies.
From past couple months, her sleep time delayed to 9/ 9:30 pm but never before. She takes afternoon name for about 2 hrs and won't wake up early if we try to. And in the night time, she gets tired but won't go to bed. This routine is so hectic for us now.

H has to work from home and take calls late night and I have to study.
We try to put her to bed and have to stay with her for 1 hr min. till she sleeps. Either story telling or just in lap. If any noise in other room, like dad is there, lights on, or india call to grandparents or friends she knows, or some TV sound or some friend there, she will not stay in bed.
She will keep getting up out of bed and coming to main lobby and it goes on. In her bed, she will keep singing, talking but won't sleep. So or one of us is blocked for 1-2 hrs easily and once she is slept by 10:00 , I need to wash utensils and do some reading but I feel so tired that I can not effectively study and sleep late myslef and next day wakeup late. Cycle continues...

My H keeps irritating that I do not spend time with her as somtimes he tries to put her to bed. So we keep switiching. He goes there ...after 15 mins, still no sleep, he gets bored, he comes out, then she comes out then angrily I take her in, again 1 hr...

Btw, Story telling or books is another problem. I pick up book, but she won't let me read it to her and she herself will want to go through it. So it awakes her more. Story telling - she keeps on going in loop else cries. Tel me xyz's story, abc's story, car story, cycle story...
Please suggest how do you manage.

dnormx01 · Dec 1, 2016

This is such a sweet kid! She herself tells stories and wants to play around. Don't you realize she wants to spend time with both of you. And why do you want to regiment her? I don't know the situation at your place but where we live 9-9.30 is when the kids generally sleep.

Maybe a family walk, with her on her bicycle before sleeping will tire her out and she should sleep earlier. Or reduce the afternoon 2 hours to an hour by filling the other hour with some activity. But honestly for her age, 2hours sleep is good. Also can you tell her to read her book while you read yours? Involve her into your work. Ask her to set the utensils in sets, the washed ones as you wash the others. Like spoons together, plates together etc. so your job is done, she has played and is tired to sleep.

Best wishes

chocolate · Dec 1, 2016

Op, What is your daughter's daily schedule.What time does she wake up and her meals.I havea schedule with my toddler. He wakes up at 6 /7 in the morning. The plays a bit and I give him a bath.Then I give him children's biscuits. After 1/2 or so I give him breakfast. He plays around or naps then at 12/1 he has lunch.If he sleeps after then by 4 he has to be up. Max by 430. Then I give him snacks like a small biscuit . We play around and I teach him something and by 7 he has eaten dinner . After he likes to spend time with his dad and by 8 /830 we turn off lights and he goes to sleep.

Becoz its cold here we don't go on walks or out. But try to set a definite time for her to sleep and don't indulge in story book after that time. Turn off the lights and say she has to sleep. Start from 8 then she will sleep by 8 30. she has to eat her dinner by 7 or max 715 for this to work.After son plays with his dad he gets into bed at 8 and we turn off the lights.He gets the hint and sleeps.Good Luck.

sanjuruby3 · Dec 1, 2016

chocolate said: ↑

Op, What is your daughter's daily schedule.What time does she wake up and her meals.I havea schedule with my toddler. He wakes up at 6 /7 in the morning. The plays a bit and I give him a bath.Then I give him children's biscuits. After 1/2 or so I give him breakfast. He plays around or naps then at 12/1 he has lunch.If he sleeps after then by 4 he has to be up. Max by 430. Then I give him snacks like a small biscuit . We play around and I teach him something and by 7 he has eaten dinner . After he likes to spend time with his dad and by 8 /830 we turn off lights and he goes to sleep.

Becoz its cold here we don't go on walks or out. But try to set a definite time for her to sleep and don't indulge in story book after that time. Turn off the lights and say she has to sleep. Start from 8 then she will sleep by 8 30. she has to eat her dinner by 7 or max 715 for this to work.After son plays with his dad he gets into bed at 8 and we turn off the lights.He gets the hint and sleeps.Good Luck.
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@chocolate - You kid is well trained and sounds like a nice kid. Mine is very rebellious and naughty.

@dnormx01 - With cold and damp outside, we can not take her out. I live in apartment so take her out in lobby sometimes. Then after 5 pm, once nanny goes, almost everyday I try to take her out o she gets fresh air once and burns some energy by running around.
Infact I waste so much money when I do not need to, because I take her to shops nearby (walmart , grocery) and this way, something unneccesary comes to home. Library is slightly farther and in shady location so I feel uncomfortable going (as its get dark so early) and my plan is 1 hr outside before dinner.
Dinner is 7 - 7-30 usually and then 8 - 8:30 milk. But Sleeping/time on bed = from 9 to 10 to 10:30 pm easily.
Afternoon, she sleeps by 1:30 pm ( since she wakes up late, and we wake up late)

armummy · Dec 1, 2016

Try to switch of the lights and play baby sleep music in iPad or phone in screen off mode.

She needs to unwind ...so don't let her off the bed and have the music in soft sound . It helps with my kid

guesshoo · Dec 1, 2016

There is no way around it but to train your child to follow a schedule. the more tired the child is, the less willing and able she will be to listen and fall asleep.

I suggest you look at super nanny type videos to get an idea about how to sleep train and follow the suggestions rigorously and consistently for a couple of weeks before you can see consistent results. Doesn't happen over night; takes a lot of time, effort and consistency initially. Once set and followed rigorously though, it's easy peasy. You'd be able to leave your little child after a bedtime routine and a kiss in her room to sleep by 7 and she'd fall asleep by herself.

chocolate · Dec 1, 2016

Op, You need to change her schedule. If she is set in this pattern you will end up with her cranky when she starts school.I know sometimes my son is stubborn but I don't give into and his dad also gives in sometimes, not always.Seeing no way out he sleeps.Give her dinner at 7 and let her play around. At 8 turn off lights and be next to her. Don't budge. Don't give into crying matches. Seeing no way she will sleep. Its better you do it now rather than later becoz she will end up going tired to school and learn lot less than a well rested kid.Good Luck.

sanjuruby3 · Dec 1, 2016

Does any of you have kid sleeping separate?
She sleeps with us in the same room and we have small apartment. One bedroom and one converted to office. There are times, when we leave her and she sleeps by herself . But mostly she keeps looking through light on door opening and notice any walking and if any one passes by, she will make noise etc to attract or call. Having small aprt, its not soundproof and we can trace movements even in dark and sleep. I think this is one reason.

Then TV/Gadgets attract her which I try to stop always and she hates me for that.

viki123 · Dec 1, 2016

@sanjuruby3,
It could be related to mile stone change. My DS also changed his sleep schedule, before he used to sleep at 8:00 pm now it is 9:00- 9:30. I have also observed that when we go out he is skipping his afternoon nap and sleeps at 7:00 after dinner.
Below are few things that i am following:

1. Complete my work by 8:30 or 9:00 till then he will with dad or toys. If any work left like dished etc DH will have to take care.

2. Putting DS to sleep is my work, since DH doesn't have patience.

3. Me and DS go to bedroom lock the door. His does his brushing, peepe etc. Then we do books reading in Bed. He gets to select the books, I read to him as long as he wants. Usually after 30 min, he will show me the lights or will sleep on his own. Then I pat him till he goes to deep sleep. This routine goes on for 45min - 1hr. During this time no Phone or laptop or disturbance by others.

This was tough initially. After about a week or so he got used to this schedule and he likes it.

You can also try reducing the naptime by 30 min. Encourage her to jump and play before going to bed. I generally put on his fav enacting rhymes like Head, knees & tows, ringa ringa rose etc. and DH plays with him acting along with characters. This is really fun and they get tired.

Hope this helps.

sanjuruby3 · Dec 2, 2016

Hi @viki123,

Thanks for the tips. I like the that spec 3rd one. I need to follow the same from now on.
When we go out, usually her nap time delays and would be very short but she crashes and goes to nap for sure and then evening if we are lucky ( like if we driving home, she sleeps early in car ) but at home in weekends she is usually more excited and sleeps later than normal weekdays and there are days when tired/cranky and thus won't sleep.

But I know now I need to set a routine and take the complete job to sleep her. Now we switch and sometimes he does and sometimes I do.