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Toddler only eats while watching TV - pls help!

Discussion in 'Baby / Kids Foods' started by purbamrc, Sep 25, 2009.

  1. purbamrc

    purbamrc New IL'ite

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    Hi Ladies,
    I am a full-time working mom of a 13 month old. I have always have problems feeding my son as he totally lacks interest in food. Now the only way I can get him to eat a bit without him crying/fussing is by setting him in front of the TV. He will only take some food if he is distracted by the TV. Even then he creates a lot of fuss and feeding him is a real issue.
    I know that it is a very bad habit to eat while watching TV and am desperately looking for ideas for a) getting him to eat without watching tv and b) making the feeding a happy experience for him in general (now he starts crying the moment he understands that it is feeding time).
    Can you ladies pls help?? Any ideas/suggestions are welcome.
     
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  2. tikka

    tikka Gold IL'ite

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    Purba, totally off question... How is your son's feeding taking place in your absence.
    I found that the school forced DS to finish his snack (the preschool) and DS would come back and whine about lunch and dinner. If you were to practice something and your son's caretaker were to practice other ways, it send mixed signals to the child.
    What worked for us what to give food in small increments. Morning milk (bf), breakfast, snack, bf (nap), lunch, bf (nap), snack, bf, dinner, bf to sleep. I am not sure if you are breastfeeding or formula feeding or giving cow's milk. I would suggest you pace it out to three or four two ounce milk sessions to prevent your chlid loading up on it.
    TV is a habit we got into also initially and I have gone completely TV free now (Blush) given how dependent I got. Move the TV out of the living room, if that is a possibility into the adult's room? I would suggest you offer food, if your child protests put it away, but keep offering. Dont bribe or distract.
    It is alright if one meal is missed. Offer a snack in its place. Once you take the issue of control and negative attention out of feeding, it will become a smoother sailing.
    How about textures? Is your child on table food. If not, I would also suggest offering the same food as you eat, while all of you eat at the table. Do invest in a booster chair or high chair... Meals/snacks/milk should always be at it. It inculcates the habit of eating at the table (away from TV?).
    Finally I would also suggest reading "My Child Won't Eat" Hope this helps.
     
  3. brindhaaa

    brindhaaa Bronze IL'ite

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    Dear Purba , thanks for coming out with this thread , and thanks krithika for detailed reply.

    Currently iam also facing the same problem with my 11 mth old . He is not watching tv while feeding , but he used to play with toys while feeding . For the past one month even we give toys , he is fussy on eating .. He eats but with disinterest and half the quantity of what he was eating before . Currently he is having Cerelac for breakfast , oats for lunch and Ragi porridge for dinner along with 20 ounz of FM A DAY.

    Since he has started eating in small quantities , iam thinking of implementing your suggestion of spreading the foodies into 6 times instead of 3 course meal. Since you have mentioned snacks , wanted to know what snacks can we give a 11 mth old ? Also i wanted to try rice varieties like our traditional rasam sadam , paruppu sadam , idli and dosa , but he is reluctant to eat anything without sweet taste ( iam giving all the cereals by adding jaggery ) . Dont know how to feed all these to him , since i wanted to try variety of foods for him.

    Krithika , again thanks for suggesting the book "MY CHILD WONT EAT ". Will buy the same once i relocate to chennai next month. Did the author also suggest receipes ?

    Thanks for your time .
     
  4. tikka

    tikka Gold IL'ite

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    Our snacks included mashed fruits, Rice Pori/Poha, an occasional homemade cookie :), raisins (DS spat out things he cant swallow, if your child is the sort who will swallow, please do wait on raisins). I could not find the book "My Child wont Eat" in stores here, but it is available on Amazon. If amazon shipping is less expensive to where you live, do it before you move. Just my two cents :)
    The book focuses on how to get a child to eat, in a gentle way. I have read only the bits which were relevant to me at a library, so I am not sure about the recipe bit. Anyways, it wont be Indian recipes given the author is American.
     
  5. sudhara

    sudhara New IL'ite

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    HI purba,
    As working mothers, we all have to cross this phase in life. It's quite natural in their growing up years yaar. Even my son used to take his food while watching tv. earlier it was too bad, he will only watch the programme not even one morsel will get into his mouth. I was waiting for a time to make him understand. He will throw tantrums once i switch off the tv and ask him to eat without it. I slowly switched over to playing rhymes while havingfood instead of other weepy serials or anything on tv. First week, yes it was a bit difficult because he wanted to watch the same programme which he normally watches while eating. suddenly I got an idea, without his knowledge I unplugged the TV cable connection and said there's no power at the cable operator's station and he cannot watch the programme. Believe me,. I had to act as if even I missed the programme and as if I am feeling too bad that my son is able to watch it. I asked him to have his food and wait to see whether the power has come back at the operator's station. It worked. He finished his food in a jiffy. I have been doing this for a couple of days. This is only for us to gain time to think of something novel to tackle the coming week. next week, I did the same thing and told him that instead of the serials he can watch his favourite rhymes CD. he accepted and slowly it was a switch over from serials to rhymes. One good thing is before his schooling he got thorough with almost all the rhymes. now, he is four years old, he has his food without any fuss. yaar, they are new to this environment, it is our duty to make them understand and bring them into our hold. Do not fret, I know you will also be able to win over this situation. see, you cannot be rigid with kids these days. one of my friends use to feed her child in a jiffy. There's no problem for her. she just puts him in the stroller, straps him and feed him. NO TV mind you. no sound. Her kid finishes his dinner without any tantrums. Blessed she is, I felt. But kids are meant to be naughty yaar. everything will be alright. I realised it out of my own experience.
    But remember to try out something new every week to make them think. OK.
    All the best
    sudhara
     
    Last edited: Sep 26, 2009
  6. tuvila

    tuvila New IL'ite

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    Hi all,

    My 2.5 year old also has her meals while watching TV.Breakfast at 9 watching mickey mouse and lunch at 12.30 watching Bumba!!

    I consulted a relative who is a pediatrician and a grandmother of 3 kids.She said if your kid prefers having food while watching cartoons or rhymes CD so be it.She also said that docs in recent times do not advice this but she said they will outgrow out of it soon and no harm in that!!Her daughter who is also a doc is against this !!!

    and as sudhara said it all depends on the kid.My cousins kid just a few days younger than mine just loves food.she just grabs at everything whereas mine is just not fond of food.Recently at a relatives place she was offered a plate filled with vadai,jelabis,murukus etc and after a lot of coaxing she picked a small piece of muruku bit into it and then threw it away!! she is not even fond of icecream,food just doesnt interest her!!
     
  7. sailingboat

    sailingboat Senior IL'ite

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    my children also only eat when watching tv. I think it is ok. They will eat at dinner table when they grow big. Just put some nice educational videos while eating. You can even try telling a story or reading a book.
     
  8. Traveller

    Traveller Gold IL'ite

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    Purba,

    Since most replies favour having food while watching TV i wanted to reply leisurely:)

    I have the same question as Tikka. How is your child fed when you're at work? Children as young as 6 months know 'limits'. A child will know that naani will give 3 bars of chocolate and mom will give only a small piece. as long as the rules are set and strictly followed the child knows the boundaries. having said that i'm totally against a child playing, running, watching TV while having food.

    I'm ready to take any number of negative responses here... but i find only (most) indian children are allowed to do something else when having food because the child gets distracted and feeding part becomes easy. i take my 1 yr old to a play group. we have snack time. the babies are encouraged to clean up then eat. once eating is done (i mean all children) they're given the next set of toys to play with. this sort of discipline, i believe, must be set from infancy.

    i tell my 4 yr old that he must know what is going from the plate/cup to his mouth. we do talk at the table... we discuss things we did, we saw etc., but no toys, books, tv (a soft music does play at the background sometimes).

    just like any other weaning experience, this will be tough on you Purba. But if you want your child not to watch TV while having food sincerely, then switch off. if he protests and refuses to have food let him not have food. he'll learn in a day or two that you mean it.

    my 2 cents:)

    Latha
     
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  9. Ansuya

    Ansuya Platinum IL'ite

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    Latha

    Thanks so much for your response to this issue. I'm sure it will help Purba and many other mothers out there. My baby is only three months old, but we are already very conscious of her "watching" TV (which she has started looking towards now), and try to limit the amount of time the TV is on when she is in the room. I agree with you wholeheartedly that eating is a full sensory experience that deserves its own time and maximum attention and effort (from feeder and eater). In other words, it is not something that the child should be "tricked" into doing.

    As you say, that is a tactic that is more convenient to the server/feeder than actually taking the needs of the child into account. I'm sure establishing good eating habits is difficult (which I why I'm reading this thread and preparing well in advance!) and I don't mean to undermine any of the mothers on this thread and the efforts they are making. But I have watched relatives feed children using these tactics (like you say, running around the house, playing and eating, watching TV and eating etc.) and I've always thought it was not a good idea to always associate eating with something else when it is in fact, quite a pleasurable and fulfilling activity in and of itself - can you tell how much I love food? ;)

    So, it seems children have to be trained to eat properly, and the earlier this training starts, the better. I think there is some research (I may be wrong) that connects bad eating habits in childhood with later health problems like inability to make healthy food choices and obesity. Eating in front of the TV is not all that good for adults either, in my opinion. It dulls our senses to our food and prevents us from really being connected to when we feel full (as anyone who has eaten a gigantic bucket of popcorn at the movies will testify to!). Surely this reasoning can be applied to children too?
     
  10. Traveller

    Traveller Gold IL'ite

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    Ansuya,

    congrats on motherhood. I was wondering about your absence in IL in recent times now i know why...

    i must admit that whatever lecture i have given doesn't always work at our home. there are days i give in for a change. like we sit in the couch and eat or when the weather is good in the balcony. but TV is a no anytime.

    i was thinking about this y'day too. when i (and DH) grew up we didn't have TV. and food was served by mom and we sat down to eat. at DH's home even talking while eating wasn't allowed. but somewhere down the lane i got used to reading while eating and even now i've to consciously avoid carrying a book to the table (mostly at lunch time when my boy is at school). these habits do get tough to break.

    latha
     

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