Fragrance, I really applaud you for thinking this through before making any decision. I have worked for 3 years and been at home for 1.5 years and again going to start work next week. I can tell you that once you have tasted independence, it would be difficult to adjust to depending on your husband for money[there is nothing wrong in that, btw]. Having been on both sides of the fence, I would recommend that you find a job near your home and only then leave this job, so that you can come home anytime if required. Even if the new job pays you less initially. That way, you have your priorities right, at the same time it would give you independence. However, even if you decide to leave your job for any reason, make sure that you study something to add value to your education, so that when you are ready to join work again, you are updated with what is current in the job market and you get a job easily. Also doing some course[online/nearby college/classes] would give you something intellectually stimulating to do too. Whatever you decide, make sure you don't repent it. Have confidence and make the most of it. You can do it! All the very best! -S
dear fragrance, u r in diligma which every young mother faces .as an expait in nigeria i know how difficult it is to stay mentally active when there is no job to challenge u.its very easy to just waste days literally doing nothing productive. as ur child is still 3 i feel u should not be over worried about her HW & all that studies( mine is also 3 & goes to playway).as time passes u will learn to minimise ur after job work at home & give her more time.one should deliderately set time for the kids though i am stay at home mom still i give my son undivided attention from 6-7 in evening.its not that i always play with him or help him with his HW, just sit with him & watch what he is doing or ask him question about his friends ,their dresses,the food they bring so on.. i really appreciate that ur husband is giving u full support to make any decision . as u have been working for 8-9 yrs a break will do u good too.think on those lines too,plus u may get into an hobby which u may even find more interesting then ur job. i left my job when i was 6 mths pregnant as i wanted to enjoy my pregnancy & motherhood but soon found myself increasingly bored.my dh encouraged me to try my hand in share market.i am science PG & do not know the abc of economics .initially i was reluctant to try but soon found it more interesting then my job...... as u r not working for money increase in paychk should not be a factor to continue work if u have decided other way.rather it should give u confidence that u r really good at job & will definately get better job should u decide to join after a break. all the best to u pragati
thank shakti and mahajan for your replies. hmm maybe i forgot to put in my post that though i was working for 8 years, i had taken a break in my 6 month of pregnancy and was at home for 2 years. last year i decided to start working when my baby was 2 only bec the office was near my home. after 1 month they shifted me to another place which is even though only 25 minutes away it takes me 1 to 1 1/2 hour everyday bec of traffic. so since i had a break for 2 years and then was working for a year and now i m thinking of quitting again as i cant cope with housework and office. do u think its a good idea to quit
I would also come and advice to keep on working. If you are already accustomed to the job, with it's advantages and disadvantages, I think it's a good think to try and keep it. I wouldn't like to depend financially on anyone, so me leaving my job is really out of the question. It's important to discuss this nicely with your other half and try to come to a common conclusion. The best thing with 2 salaries is that you earn more and can improve your lifestyle. Not to mention than, if one has issues with the job, the other one can cover nicely till another job is found or the problem solved.
Dear ILities, I am new to this website,but found it very interesting and its giving valuable solutions for so many confusions which ladies have.. I am recently married before 10months and am working in hyderabad in a good MNC. The problem/confusion am facing with is: 1) Me and my husband daily travelling 2hrs in the morning/2hrs in the evening to office/home,as we are staying with our inlaws faraway from office.As of now,its not possible to shift near to office. 2) I have mild thyroid and irregular periods,previously i took medication for pcos as well.And as its about 1yr ppl started asking me about good news ...but because of hectic schedule of both me and my husband,we dont have enough time to spend together also...:-( 3) Also,am working in the same company since longtime around more than 5yrs, so wanted to have some change.But company is growing good now,but at the same time its a midsize company and we always need to give our best to grow here..which am not able to after marriage because of more travel,because of want to enjoy life as we are newly married.. 4) So whats coming to my mind atlast is to resign job and takecare of my health, and to have baby and then after that to search for new job.As I have good experiece and onsite experiece too,am confident that I can get it later also. But the only thing is,I should spend the time when am at home wisely. 5) Even my parents,in-laws,husband everyone is supportive and are OK with this.But decision taking part they left to me..Since they are trusting me in taking such a vital decision ,I would like to have a crosscheck again whether am taking right decision or not.. So now my confusion is, am i taking right decision to resign job and relax for sometime ? Or do I have to stretch myself to manage work/home/health/personaltime/ourtime(me and my husband)... I like doing job but at the sametime not able to enjoy it now somehow,because of somany thoughts..especially regarding health... But so many threads I read about refers to ladies would like to take break on job/career only if they are pregnant.But my scenario is something different.So now my confusion is, am i taking right decision to resign job and relax for sometime ? Or do I have to stretch myself to manage work/home/health/personaltime/ourtime(me and my husband)... Please reply back to me with your valuable suggestions..i hope it really helps... Sorry for such a long emaill..
See the scenario of one person is totally different from the scenario of the other! I was in the same league of yours when I got married.. I used to travel for 1.5 hrs to work and my timings would be like I leave by 7.30 and return by 6.30 but my Dh used to work in US timings so he used to go in the afternoon by 11 or 12 and return by 10-11 in the night. So we never had time for each other Also, at that time, the project in which I was working was not very good and was making it more depressing.. So, I was contemplating of quitting. But something was stopping me. I decided to move on for some more time. Incidentally 2 good things happened at the same time. I moved to a good project which had well balanced work and very good friends. At the same time I became pregnant soon. So both my problems got solved and I continued to work happily. What I want to say is, the feeling may be momentary. Try pulling off for some more time. Check with your DH on what he feels. And also think of your financial needs and then take your call. But, even if you quit I am sure you will not feel bad or feel bored. You can spend time on things you have always wanted to do! So Cheer up and All the Best!!
