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to be a better better-half read this: Relationship Secrets . . .]

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by Rajjo, Aug 27, 2007.

  1. Rajjo

    Rajjo Junior IL'ite

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    Hi,
    Hope u guys like this,

    Relationship Secrets . . .


    ANNIVERSARIES
    Always celebrate! Whether it's the 1st or the 50th, each year together is a triumph.

    APPRECIATION

    Let each other know how much you appreciate each other. You may already know but hearing it from each other is always better.

    BEST FRIENDS

    Be best friends preferably before being boyfriend-girlfriend. Take time to know each other so the relationship will be a deep one. Tell each other about your crushes, dreams and problems. Make sure he/she is your best friend before getting engaged. The strong bond of friendship will help you both survive tough times.

    BOND

    Make it a point to spend time together often but leave room for each other. Also spend time alone w/ each other, so that at the end of the day you could both share your experiences. This way, you stay interesting with your partner.

    CHANGING EACH OTHER

    Don't marry an as...le, j.... or a bi.... (an unsuitable person) You'll never change each other.

    COMPLIMENTS

    Always compliment each other. This will prevent feelings of resentment & thinking that one is being taken for granted.
    <script><!-- D(["mb","\u003cbr\>DATE\u003c/span\>\u003c/b\>\u003cbr\>Keep doings things that you both enjoy, do them together. Make time & continue to date to keep the romance - look good, smell good to maintain physical attraction \n\u003cbr\>\u003cb\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-weight:bold\"\>\u003cbr\>DIFFERENCES\u003c/span\>\u003c/b\>\u003cbr\>Celebrate differences. Never force your ideologies down each other's throat. Give up trying to turn your partner into you. Accept differences, appreciate them. \n\u003cbr\>\u003cb\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-weight:bold\"\>\u003cbr\>FIGHTS\u003c/span\>\u003c/b\>\u003cbr\>Fight w/the aim to resolve the issue. Don't outdo each other. The longer you extend the fight. The more chances that you'll say something hurtful that you don't really mean. As mad as you were w/ your partner, he/she is still the person who laughs at your jokes & thinks you're hot. Hear each other out, don't dig up old issues. Choose your battles. Make sure the fight will be worth it & that something will change in the relationship as a result of the fight. \n\u003cbr\>\u003cb\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-weight:bold\"\>\u003cbr\>FLAWS\u003c/span\>\u003c/b\>\u003cbr\>Know that the perfect person does not exist. Know that just as there are things that you love about him/her, there will be things that will make you go crazy. We are only human with our own flaws. \n\u003cbr\>\u003cb\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-weight:bold\"\>\u003cbr\>FUN\u003c/span\>\u003c/b\>\u003cbr\>Have fun together! This means keeping the fun & spontaneity that was there in the early days. \u003cbr\>Allow yourselves to get silly - shower together, pee w/the door open etc. Being able to make each other laugh & see the lighter, crazier, absurd side is the best way to get through all the differences in personalities, adjustments in lifestyle & opposing viewpoints. \n\u003cb\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-weight:bold\"\>\u003cbr\>\u003cbr\>GOALS\u003c/span\>\u003c/b\>\u003cbr\>Make sure you have similar goals. It would be difficult to keep your bond intact if your views are complete opposite.\u003cbr\>\u003cb\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-weight:bold\"\>\u003cbr\>\nGRUDGES\u003c/span\>\u003c/b\>\u003cbr\>Quit tabulating grudges. Let it off. Discuss it, then trash it, don't recycle it.\u003cbr\>\u003cb\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-weight:bold\"\>\u003cbr\>\u003cbr\>",1] ); //--></script>
    DATE

    Keep doings things that you both enjoy, do them together. Make time & continue to date to keep the romance - look good, smell good to maintain physical attraction

    DIFFERENCES

    Celebrate differences. Never force your ideologies down each other's throat. Give up trying to turn your partner into you. Accept differences, appreciate them.

    FIGHTS

    Fight w/the aim to resolve the issue. Don't outdo each other. The longer you extend the fight. The more chances that you'll say something hurtful that you don't really mean. As mad as you were w/ your partner, he/she is still the person who laughs at your jokes & thinks you're hot. Hear each other out, don't dig up old issues. Choose your battles. Make sure the fight will be worth it & that something will change in the relationship as a result of the fight.

    FLAWS

    Know that the perfect person does not exist. Know that just as there are things that you love about him/her, there will be things that will make you go crazy. We are only human with our own flaws.

    FUN

    Have fun together! This means keeping the fun & spontaneity that was there in the early days.
    Allow yourselves to get silly - shower together, pee w/the door open etc. Being able to make each other laugh & see the lighter, crazier, absurd side is the best way to get through all the differences in personalities, adjustments in lifestyle & opposing viewpoints.

    GOALS

    Make sure you have similar goals. It would be difficult to keep your bond intact if your views are complete opposite.

    GRUDGES

    Quit tabulating grudges. Let it off. Discuss it, then trash it, don't recycle it.


    <script><!-- D(["mb","HONESTY\u003c/span\>\u003c/b\>\u003cbr\>Don't lie or hide things. The problem will only get bigger. \n\u003cbr\>\u003cb\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-weight:bold\"\>\u003cbr\>KNOW EACH OTHER\u003c/span\>\u003c/b\>\u003cbr\>Learn each other's interest. It really keeps the conversation flowing!\u003cbr\>\u003cb\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-weight:bold\"\>\u003cbr\>HUG\u003c/span\>\u003c/b\>\u003cbr\>A hug can be far better more intimate than a kiss. \n\u003cbr\>\u003cb\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-weight:bold\"\>\u003cbr\>IDENTITY\u003c/span\>\u003c/b\>\u003cbr\>Don't lose your personality - that's why he/she fell in love w/you. Have separate interest & activities to keep your individual, & to be able to contribute more to the relationship. \n\u003cbr\>\u003cb\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-weight:bold\"\>\u003cbr\>INDEPENDENCE\u003c/span\>\u003c/b\>\u003cbr\>Having your own income means you're the boss in your life.\u003cbr\>\u003cb\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-weight:bold\"\>\u003cbr\>IN-LAWS\u003c/span\>\u003c/b\>\u003cbr\>Make rooms for the in-laws. \n\u003cbr\>\u003cb\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-weight:bold\"\>\u003cbr\>INTENTIONS\u003c/span\>\u003c/b\>\u003cbr\>Wish each other well. Don't wish each other worst\u003cbr\>\u003cb\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-weight:bold\"\>\u003cbr\>ISSUES\u003c/span\>\u003c/b\>\u003cbr\>Speak up about the awkward stuff now,like money & sex. The earlier, the better. \n\u003cbr\>\u003cb\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-weight:bold\"\>\u003cbr\>LISTEN\u003c/span\>\u003c/b\>\u003cbr\>Listen, listen, listen. Hear each other out especially during arguments.\u003cbr\>\u003cb\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-weight:bold\"\>\u003cbr\>LOOK GOOD\u003c/span\>\u003c/b\>\u003cbr\>Mind your appearance! Stay fit & healthy for each other. \n\u003cbr\>\u003cb\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-weight:bold\"\>\u003cbr\>LOVE\u003c/span\>\u003c/b\>\u003cbr\>It all boils down to your love, chemistry & respect for each other.\u003cbr\>\u003cb\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-weight:bold\"\>\u003cbr\>MEMORIES\u003c/span\>\u003c/b\>\u003cbr\>Remind each other of the old days. Do something that you used to do for each other before. It may even be corny but it made you two together. Experience new things together- from dining into a new restaurant to experiencing street food together to exploring to new places. It's the little surprises that make great memories. \n\u003cbr\>\u003cb\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-weight:bold\"\>\u003cbr\>MIND READING\u003c/span\>\u003c/b\>\u003cbr\>No matter how long you've been together, do not think that you can read each other's mind.",1] ); //--></script>HONESTY

    Don't lie or hide things. The problem will only get bigger.

    KNOW EACH OTHER

    Learn each other's interest. It really keeps the conversation flowing!

    HUG

    A hug can be far better more intimate than a kiss.

    IDENTITY

    Don't lose your personality - that's why he/she fell in love w/you. Have separate interest & activities to keep your individual, & to be able to contribute more to the relationship.

    INDEPENDENCE

    Having your own income means you're the boss in your life.

    IN-LAWS

    Make rooms for the in-laws.

    INTENTIONS

    Wish each other well. Don't wish each other worst

    ISSUES

    Speak up about the awkward stuff now,like money & sex. The earlier, the better.

    LISTEN

    Listen, listen, listen. Hear each other out especially during arguments.

    LOOK GOOD

    Mind your appearance! Stay fit & healthy for each other.

    LOVE

    It all boils down to your love, chemistry & respect for each other.

    MEMORIES

    Remind each other of the old days. Do something that you used to do for each other before. It may even be corny but it made you two together. Experience new things together- from dining into a new restaurant to experiencing street food together to exploring to new places. It's the little surprises that make great memories.

    MIND READING

    No matter how long you've been together, do not think that you can read each other's mind.<script><!-- D(["mb","\u003cbr\>\u003cb\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-weight:bold\"\>\u003cbr\>NEEDS\u003c/span\>\n \u003c/b\>\u003cbr\>Be good to yourself, then be good to your partner. That's what love is all about. Think about your partner. Will it make him/her happy? Will she/he enjoy it? Consider each other's feelings. Be very attentive & sensitive to each other's needs, physically & emotionally, that way your partner learns to do the same for you. Never take your partner for granted. \n\u003cbr\>\u003cb\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-weight:bold\"\>\u003cbr\>PRIORITIES\u003c/span\>\u003c/b\>\u003cbr\>If one says it's important, then it is! Prioritize each other among other things!\u003cbr\>\u003cb\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-weight:bold\"\>\u003cbr\>SPACE\u003c/span\>\u003c/b\>\u003cbr\>Give each other space. Have dates with your girlfriends, have your boy's night out. If you can't trust each other with this, then don't get married. \n\u003cbr\>\u003cb\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-weight:bold\"\>\u003cbr\>SORRY\u003c/span\>\u003c/b\>\u003cbr\>Say sorry when you're wrong.\u003cbr\>\u003cb\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-weight:bold\"\>\u003cbr\>SURPRISES\u003c/span\>\u003c/b\>\u003cbr\>No matter how long you've known each other, be open to surprises, both good or bad. \n\u003cbr\>\u003cb\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-weight:bold\"\>\u003cbr\>TEAMWORK\u003c/span\>\u003c/b\>\u003cbr\>Think for two & always work as a team. Consult each other before making a decision because everything will always affect both of you. Strengthen couple power. In many ways, we have to decide based on what is best for the relationship in favor of our individual selves. \n\u003cbr\>\u003cb\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-weight:bold\"\>\u003cbr\>SUPPORT\u003c/span\>\u003c/b\>\u003cbr\>Support each other's dream. Be willing to follow your passions, support your partner in his/her decisions & create new ones together. Two heads are better than one. \n\u003cbr\>\u003cb\>\u003cspan style\u003d\"font-weight:bold\"\>\u003cbr\>TALK\u003c/span\>\u003c/b\>\u003cbr\>Tell each other's stories. Life goes by so fast & its easy to see how easily couple can grow apart. Whenever something funny, scary, exciting or juicy happened to you or to someone you know, tell each other about it & have your partner do the same. Keep each other in the loop of life, even by email if you have to. \n\u003cbr\>\u003cbr\>\u003c/span\>",1] ); //--></script>

    NEEDS

    Be good to yourself, then be good to your partner. That's what love is all about. Think about your partner. Will it make him/her happy? Will she/he enjoy it? Consider each other's feelings. Be very attentive & sensitive to each other's needs, physically & emotionally, that way your partner learns to do the same for you. Never take your partner for granted.

    PRIORITIES

    If one says it's important, then it is! Prioritize each other among other things!

    SPACE

    Give each other space. Have dates with your girlfriends, have your boy's night out. If you can't trust each other with this, then don't get married.

    SORRY

    Say sorry when you're wrong.

    SURPRISES

    No matter how long you've known each other, be open to surprises, both good or bad.

    TEAMWORK

    Think for two & always work as a team. Consult each other before making a decision because everything will always affect both of you. Strengthen couple power. In many ways, we have to decide based on what is best for the relationship in favor of our individual selves.

    SUPPORT

    Support each other's dream. Be willing to follow your passions, support your partner in his/her decisions & create new ones together. Two heads are better than one.

    TALK

    Tell each other's stories. Life goes by so fast & its easy to see how easily couple can grow apart. Whenever something funny, scary, exciting or juicy happened to you or to someone you know, tell each other about it & have your partner do the same. Keep each other in the loop of life, even by email if you have to.



    regds,
     
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  2. Anandchitra

    Anandchitra IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear Rajjo

    Thanks so much for this incredible AWESOME post. really enjoyed reading it. I am living my life as per this post and am extremely fortunate to be married to a wonderful human being. i should say i am truly blessed. I will share this with him and use this as a reference from time to time. Thanks
    anandchitra:2thumbsup:
     
  3. Rajjo

    Rajjo Junior IL'ite

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    Hi,Anandchitra,
    Happy u liked it.:)


    regds.
    Rajjo
     
  4. Jananikrithsan

    Jananikrithsan Gold IL'ite

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    Hi Rajjo,
    That was a real good post. It makes you think as you read it and also kinda wonder whether we follow all that is said here. The magic in a relationship needs to be nurtured only after a few years of being married, thatt's the time your comitmnets increase and you hardly find time for each other.
    Thanks and will make sure to keep these wonderful words in mind.:-D
     
  5. Shanvy

    Shanvy IL Hall of Fame

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    Hi rajjo,
    This one is good. I think you should really follow this so that you dont become a bitter -half.

    For the past 13+ years going roughly on the same points, proudly feel am other half of my better half.
     
  6. Sravanthi28

    Sravanthi28 Silver IL'ite

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    hi Rajjo,
    Very good post. Thanks for sharing. Allthough i have read about few points before, i have never taken them seriously. Thanks a lot fro remimding me of these valuable secrets, i am implementing them.

    luv,
    Sravanthi
     
  7. sunkan

    sunkan Gold IL'ite

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    Hey Rajjo,
    That Was A Wonderful One, Though Very Tough To Remember I Think All Must Paste This In The Bedroom Or Kitchen Or Places Where They Look Often, And Remember...sunkan
     
  8. sravy

    sravy Bronze IL'ite

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    Hi Rajjo ,

    realy very intresting thread ,Thank u for sharing with us . Each & every point is to be keep in mind .:p :thankyou2:

    bye
    sravy
    .
     
  9. piu

    piu New IL'ite

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    thanks Rajjo for suggesions n tips....in our married life most of us forget our old days for presure.....u remind our beutiful past.....surely I'll do those.....
     
  10. Nivedi

    Nivedi New IL'ite

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    Hope many bitter-half's will become better-half's after reading this!
     

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