'tis The Season ...

Amica · Dec 21, 2018

At this time of year, everyone's a touch exhausted from shopping, wrapping, mailing and baking. Tempers tend to be a little frayed from hearing "Feliz Navidad" ad infinitum. And then there's the socializing ...

We have a group of friends who celebrate most occasions together. Last Saturday, we had our Christmas party at Rati's home. Everyone was dressed in cute holiday outfits, the food was delicious and a good time was had by all. Well, almost all — or what would be the point of this story?

Rati holds a Yankee Swap (aka White Elephant or Dirty Santa) every year. Each guest brings a wrapped gift costing no more than $25. All the gifts are placed in a pile under the tree. After dinner is when the fun begins. We each draw a number from a hat. The guest who draws #1 gets first pick of the gifts. S/he chooses any gift from the pile and unwraps it. Then the guest who draws #2 chooses a gift and unwraps it. Guest #2 can keep her/his gift or swap it with Guest #1's gift. We go around the room till everyone has a gift. Then Guest #1 can trade gifts with anyone if s/he likes. By the end everyone has unwrapped a gift and has had an opportunity to exchange their gift for something else.

All of us want what someone else has and we have fun as gifts make their way from hand to hand. Most folks go home with a gift they don't really want but still laughing over the silliness. We've done this for years and always had a blast.

This was Medha's first Yankee Swap. She's a relative newcomer to the group — we've only known her a year or so. She was rather pleased with the gift she chose and unwrapped and got quite upset when it was promptly "stolen." She spent the rest of the evening in stony silence but we were all having too good a time to pay attention.

The next day, we met at Devyani's home to trade cookies. We were oohing and ahhing and boxing the sweet morsels when Medha abruptly lost it. She burst out angrily about her gift being "stolen" at the Yankee Swap. She ranted for a good ten minutes about how wrong and inconsiderate it was and how cheated she felt. There was an uncomfortable silence while she expressed her outrage.

All week, Medha's reaction to the Swap has been the topic of discussion in our group. Some pointed out that even the kiddos have never thrown a tantrum over the traded gifts. Others commented that the presents are only $25 and one can easily buy a coveted item for oneself. Most said that the fun of trading outweighed any disappointments.

Various people mentioned Medha's pettiness during group outings. She's always the one who splits restaurant bills (and tips!) down to the last penny and makes sure each person pays up. But mostly we acknowledged that she has a heart of gold and all of us enjoy her company.

At the end of the day, we concluded that we all have our quirks. Medha is a good friend and we're glad to have her in our group.

She's just funny about money.
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Amica · Dec 21, 2018

I'd love to know what you think:

Do you agree with Medha that Yankee Swaps are an abomination and must be banned?
Do you think they're fun and we should continue the tradition?
Do you, too, have friends with unusual attitudes? Funny about money or something else?

Let's hear your Christmas party and Secret Santa stories.
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Greenbay · Dec 21, 2018

Some people might be sensitive about what they earned and when they perceive of ‘losing’ it. May be she has a backdrop story in her childhood or formative years that the prize she coveted the most was ‘lost’ and it still pinches her.

Similar fun can be had in other games too (our group plays many board games like Avalon, Secret Hitler etc). As one grows older, fun is in the company you covet and not the type of games you play.

Rihana · Dec 21, 2018

Amica said: ↑

I'd love to know what you think:

Do you agree with Medha that Yankee Swaps are an abomination and must be banned?
Click to expand...

I've found that the gift swaps are more fun at work.

Do you think they're fun and we should continue the tradition?
Click to expand...

Let's say they are a good spectator sport.

Do you, too, have friends with unusual attitudes? Funny about money or something else?
Click to expand...

Aiyo, don't get me started. These abound in my friends and surely in me too. There is a dear dear friend who when paying in restaurant, will peer at me from above her glasses, and ask what would be the cents to add to round off the amount to a certain whole number. I tell her if the charge is $26.83 and she wants to pay $30, just put the $30 there, leave tip field blank, waiter will still get the tip. No, she waits for me to tell that tip should be 3.17. : )

Let's hear your Christmas party and Secret Santa stories.
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Click to expand...

One enthusiastic cutlet hostess added a dress color code for guests at the last minute. I mean like 11pm whatsapp the previous night. Men wear color1, women wear color2, and added a directive of Indian/western. And said, 'let's go with the holiday spirit.'

I stayed home. Good decision. There were like 75 people in a medium size home. Big Christmas tree. : ) I had already bought the secret santa gift. Gave it to another friend as a just-like-that recently.

periamma · Dec 21, 2018

@Amica You have shared a new game and i am thinking of giving return gifts in our family kids birthday parties.Gifts with same value is a must to bring satisfaction among moms.Loved your snippet

Viswamitra · Dec 21, 2018

@Amica,

Leave your friend's disppointment aside. I was 12 or 13 years old. My mother gave one of my play set to a cousin without my consent. She had seen the worst temper tantrum from me. She went to the bus stop and collected the play set back from my aunt.

My son was doing his undergrad. We moved the teddy bear he brought with him in the plane when we all migrated to US in 1995 to a safe place away from his sight. He didn't talk to me for 2-3 days. When I asked him what he was upset about, he told me to put back the teddy bear back in the same spot and asked me to never touch again.

We can never predict what subject is sensitive to someone.

GeetaKashyap · Dec 21, 2018

@Amica,

Interesting year end games!

Any game can drag out the child hiding inside each one of us>children do throw tantrums upon losing>so we may surmise that Baby Medha's response was valid!

Money can bring out the true colors of people!

Srama · Dec 21, 2018

Dear @Amica,

In our party, it is usually some not wanted, unhappy to have received, happy to trade it away gift from the basement. It is almost a rule! The hostess usually keeps a good gift and the fight is for that one only!!! Gosh the number of hands it changes is incredible! We are usually happy to have replaced our unwanted gift with another one at the end of the day! Your friend perhaps will get into the spirit of the game next year. Perhaps she can bring the same gift she got this year to the next year's party! She is indeed lucky to have friends who are willing to indulge her! What is the point of the season anyways if not!

Amica said: ↑

Let's hear your Christmas party and Secret Santa stories.

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Click to expand...

Shhh!! It is all a big secret!

Happy Holidays to you and your loved ones!

jskls · Dec 22, 2018

Hi Amica
Your friend will get into the spirit of the game once she trades off her unwanted gift for something beautiful. Some people are just smart with their money to the penny.

Glad you had wonderful yankee swap and cookie swap. I participate in one of them at work. Happy holidays and a very happy new year too

shravs3 · Dec 22, 2018

Cool game Amica. I remember my college and office days were we used to play Secret Santa where all the names will be written and each one has to pick up one name and gift them on the final day. All this should happen anonymously. Tats the fun!
There was one funny incident at my workplace. It lasted for 4 days, 1st day is to give greetings, 2nd day is to give chocolates , 3rd day is task day and final day is to exchange the actual gift.
Funnily my manager had picked up my name. Somehow me and my friends guessed that it’s my manager. There came the Chocolate day. Secretly we need to place chocolates near their desk when that person is not present at their desk. All my friends/colleagues got chocolates but I dint get. So I was little upset.
So my friends started shouting that were are your chocolates Shravs, looks like your Santa is very Kanjus
I think my manager heard that, and after a while we went for Coffee break.
After I returned I saw my drawer was filled with chocolates. I was on cloud 9

Next day comes the task day where our Santa’s place chit which has task in it. We are supposed to do the task. My task was super funny. I was supposed to put 2 plaits and do ramp walk...
Until then never in my life time I had put 2 plaits , even to school, since my hair was too short for plaits.
My friend helped me with French plaits and I had to do ramp walk all over my team Everyone commented that it was super cute

Final day we need to gift them. We should be very cautious since the person should not know who is that Santa. I finally got Parker pen!

Like your friend Medha , even I was upset for not getting chocolates. It’s not with the cost but the feeling when you alone donot receive, whereas others are enjoying their chocolates. I know that feeling and it sucks!