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Tips To Survive Indian Marriages

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by Sunshine04, Sep 19, 2017.

  1. poovai

    poovai Platinum IL'ite

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    This is just like at work joining the new team. We watch our surroundings and other's behavior to act accordingly. As they say in Tamil, "puli pathunguvathu paayathan", (translation: tiger chooses its moment to hunt) :thumbup::thumbup:
     
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  2. Thyagarajan

    Thyagarajan IL Hall of Fame

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    Super adage. Thank you.
    Regards.
     
  3. VaishaliYadav

    VaishaliYadav Senior IL'ite

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    haha two thumbs up. Completely agree your argument.
     
  4. Deborah

    Deborah Gold IL'ite

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    @Thyagarajan - Not defending my mother at all here ,I couldn't follow her advise too.I was like " I am not a dumb moron to follow everything meekly".But now I realize what she meant was to be patient,observe and thinking twice before doing/saying anything.It doesn't mean to be a poor spectator ,but to intervene or putting one's foot down only when necessary.I wish I could follow this atleast for sometime.But impatience got the better of me.You are absolutely right when you say its difficult for well educated women to hold their tongues.But sometimes 'feigning' silence and submission goes a long way.:)
     
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  5. Naari

    Naari Platinum IL'ite

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    Deb, what about setting the right expectations from the beginning ? If you are quiet & observing for 5 years, it may be too hard to change things that have settled/ been established for so long!

    Also, I agree most educated girls can't be quiet observers for that long. Education & financial independence also brings in a certain degree of inflexibility, which would prevent being a passive observer.. and those that endured things for so long did themselves permanent emotional damage
     
    Last edited: Sep 22, 2017
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  6. Naari

    Naari Platinum IL'ite

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    Also, a big reason why I get enraged when I read the news articles about highly educated women being harassed & even murdered by the in laws, why the would they take so much nonsense in the first place? :angry::grin:
     
    Last edited: Sep 21, 2017
  7. lazy

    lazy Silver IL'ite

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    I too felt the same

    Recently c.a degree holder murdered by her in-laws incident provoked me a lot. She has her c.a degree then why the hell she supported her parents decision and get back to her marriage life after each fight between her and her in-laws .

    If her parents doesn't support her for divorce, she can live her life independently without them. I don't understand this
     
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  8. lavani

    lavani Platinum IL'ite

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    this is a excellent advice. Not all girls are equally mature to handle this way. As you mentioned men being immature , i had seen women being immature and ruining their lives and their own family lives with their anger. It happened to my brother. now they just fight all the time and a kid is stuck in middle.
     

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