Tips to combat bouts of depression and loneliness

Sriparna

Here is a link to another thread on this site that may help

http://www.indusladies.com/forums/h4-indian-ladies/151-h4-wife-things-to-do-8.html#post395241

Although you are in England and not the US, and you're not an H4 wife, the tips I have written in the above post (and the other great advice given by ILites on that same thread) should give you some ideas on how to occupy yourself gainfully.

It is good you want to shield your husband from your worries, but remember that he has a role to play too in making you feel better. Make sure he understands it's hard for you to be alone all the time, so that even if he is busy during the week, he makes some time for the two of you to go out and have some fun during the weekend. This will help you a lot when it comes to getting through the week on your own.

Also, I'm not sure who takes care of the business end of running the house (bills, taxes, paperwork, DIY maintenance etc.) but if he shared more of those responsibilities with you (that is, gave you more of that work to do), you could keep yourself busy and contribute to the good running of your household and life together.

Don't despair, because it is possible for you to overcome your depression and actually start enjoying your life again. Being alone doesn't have to mean being lonely. Use this time and energy productively and you'll discover aspects of yourself (like self-confidence and an inner strength independent of being surrounded by other people and a support system) that you never knew you had.

Good luck!

 

That’s very sad dear. You can do a plenty of activities. But as for now the one that is coming in my mind is cooking. That’s one of the most creative art I must say. I am very fond of cooking. When I am at home, doing nothing, I indulge in making some new innovative dishes, mostly though don’t turn out to be very good, but I never lose hope.
I tell you, nothing will give you more pleasure than making something new…
Try it out dear…it will surely help you…
Love,
Aparajita

 

hi,
think positively and see the changes it brings. keep in touch with your friends and relatives thru mail. see to that u set a routine of your house hold work such that it keeps u engaged thruout the morning session. hear to some music while doing ur work.
take a break in the afternoon and go for a walk in the evening (exercise and relaxation)
dress up well after a shower to greet ur tired husband and see the diffedrence.
regards
lalitha

 

Sorry to hear that U feel so lonely.I had the same problem when I first came here.But now I slowly developed the habit of reading books,doing some crochet work,some hand work ,going out for a walk regaulary , taking up some tutions and also browsing lots of website .......
You can also try some of this and also try to listen to music.If you religious,there are lots of options online.you can hear upanyasams online and read lots of books online on the same........

Hope this helps.......

 

Hmmm…listen to music dear. You can listen to music even if you are happy or sad. Try listening to any of your favorite singers, or better listen to Rabindra Sangeet, I am sure you do listen to those. Nothing will cheer you up than these soulful Rabindra Sangeet. To share you a secret, I love listening to ‘amar mukti aloy aloy’ whenever I am feeling down and like a magic, this song boosts me up…

The idea of cooking is also very good…I can give you the best idea, listen to Rabindra Sangeet and try out new recipes.

Hope this will help…
Love and care,

 

Hi Sriparna,
I completely agree with Teesta. You know, if you ask me I’d say there is no better means of relaxation than music. It has a therapeutic effect. Just ask your hubby to get you a few CDs possibly Indian based ones… you will start humming within no time and forget all about your claustrophobia.
But I disagree with you on one head—why should you conceal your situation from your spouse? After all, he is the only buddy you have there in a foreign land. Tell him as soon as possible, dear he needs to understand your crisis. Tell him when he is not too busy…I’m sure he will help you out.
Take care,
Shreya

 

I truly support what Shreya has said, before trying out anything else, you should first go and share whatever you are feeling, good or bad with your husband. Make your hubby your friend first, I am sure he will understand your problem and will try to solve your problem as well. You know what my intuition is saying; you both will soon go for a vacation…Lol!!!!
Hope it comes true. Share with him dear.
Love