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time spent wid hubby

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by dimple7, Jul 23, 2015.

  1. dimple7

    dimple7 Gold IL'ite

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    Friends.....i want to know the reality of the world.
    I want to know how much fruitful time does our husband spend with us besides their busy schedule...?
    please share your experience here.
    Please also mention how long they spend at home and how much time they do give you. Also mention the how many years its has been since your marriage.
     
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  2. guesshoo

    guesshoo IL Hall of Fame

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    Married for well over a decade and have reconciled to the fact that sport and work and child take higher priority than me and in that order. As for me, well, I guess I am rather independent to the point that I don't begrudge that. Unless there is a clash... When an evil look from me will work wonders. Given that I don't nag and that I am more or less easy going, the evil look turns on the guilt I suppose. Whatever, when I want the attention, I get it.
     
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  3. mcutiepie

    mcutiepie Gold IL'ite

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    We have been married for 3.5 years... we had a great courtship period of 6 months and hence were my expectations but things were diifferent when Ils came to picture post marriage... it took time for me too to understand that I have my own live.. I am not entirely dependent on husband for my happiness.. Because my MIL is very much attached with my DH and initially after coming back she wants him to be there gossiping till 11-12.. no limit... to some extent.. I bring it to 9:30 - 10.. but now I dont care where he is once we are back home.. just that i push him to spend time with baby...

    Sooner we learn to be independent in all aspects.. easier our life would be...
     
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  4. Iamagoodgirl

    Iamagoodgirl Platinum IL'ite

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    Its been 1.5 years of my marriage.We both have business and no kids yet i think thats makes it more easy for us.Atlist 3 in a week we go for evening walk or small ride on two wheeler to the nearest fun place.
     
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  5. SwarnaVenkat

    SwarnaVenkat Junior IL'ite

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    We have been married for 8 years. The order goes like this His own time(TV/internet/sleep), kid, his friends, sports, then me. But he is a nice person. I go to office early and return home early, he goes late and return late. no time for fight also:bonk. initially there were many fights... down the lane I do not want to fight and get myself tired and waste the week end. If I m upset, I will stop talking to him and continue my work and will become alright by myself in 3 or 4 days. We hardly spent an half an hour together in week days and at least one full day in week ends..
     
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  6. katochsimi

    katochsimi Gold IL'ite

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    ours is almost 8 years with two kids.
    and ours is revers...early years after marriage (before kids) we spend lot of time with his parents and office and travel ( as we use to stay in diff city then his parents)
    but gradually we understood that we cannot make anyone happy and why wasting time in wrong investment. so we started giving time to each other.
    even today also we make sure taht however busy we are but still we sit and chat late night (after children sleeps). and touch wood he is gem of person and listen and respect all my decision. now pls dont predict i rule him:hide:
    we have that much understanding all this is all by our experience with both families.
    what ever bad happened to us with ILs had only brought us together.

    but sometimes it also happens that we are so busy we dont c each others face also. but make sure to text and convey that we miss each other.
    i always convey my feelings..good or bad with him and also ask him without nagging whenever he sounds dull and low.
    earlier we use to fight and wont chat for days ...but it was he always taking initiative to break that silence. i then realised that i m become mean and selfish so i now dotn make any reason for fight. even when we fight i stop it immediately so that it wont proceed...
     
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  7. dimple7

    dimple7 Gold IL'ite

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    thanks to everyone for sharing
     
  8. dimple7

    dimple7 Gold IL'ite

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    i am newly married......but i feel he is hardly interested to spend quality time with me. We sit sometime to watch tv together with silence . We sit long time idly mostly .....without chatting or cracking any jokes. But i know he is very humourous with friends and others but he doesnot care to spend time chatting or discussing or sharing any exerience etc.
    He never texts me when out. I feel lack of attachment from his side.
    Its not even a year since we are married.
    Please help
     
  9. yellowmango

    yellowmango IL Hall of Fame

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    Dimple ,sometimes it takes time,specially if it is an arranged marriage.
    You can take the lead without being too pushy.
    Send him silly jokes.Some mildly naughty ones but not too naughty.
    Try to watch something of his interest on tv.
    If you both are into watching movies...turn it into special experience. If you two are alone in the house,plan on watching some movie. Make popcorn,and other food that can be had in front of the tv. Make the room look special. Then sit down with him to watch the movie.

    If he likes watching sports ,join in with some snacks.Even if you don't like the sport,just sit with him with a book or magazine .Enjoy the time together.

    Hopefully ,slowly you both will start enjoying your time together.
     
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  10. dimple7

    dimple7 Gold IL'ite

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    yes it is always i do.....but sometime feel as if am begging ....and its only my need. The main problem is that he doesnot feel its important or doesnot even try to make it quality time
     

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