Hi fencesitter, Not only for me ... but even for all those around me. Read this: http://www.salon.com/2010/06/27/sex_at_dawn_interview/ Chris Ryan : A couple of weeks ago, I sat for a pretty long interview (about an hour) at the offices of Big Think in New York. They'll be releasing edited bits over the next few weeks. Here's the first one. http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=m9v5DuZPOCw
Hi Nandita...............Recently I saw an information in news that according to the 2011 Indian Census, 7 % of Indian women remain single..........without ever getting married. Probably, in the coming years, remaining single for a woman, will no more considered to be a taboo. Please check out The Hindu : News / National : Good news for single women in 12th Plan
Nandita: What's the point of the OP? If its working for you, that's great. Are you looking for validation? Wider practicing of this way of life? What? Personally, I don't have a problem with adults practicing what works for them with other consenting adults. But if you are trying to recruit others or market/evangelize this way of life, you will run into resistance. But then what's your angle here?
It needs courage to call a spade ..........as spade sometimes. I have studied Human Anthropology. I absolutely agree with you....100 % agree with you...........and Christopher Ryan's research (why Christopher Ryan only. I also agree with the works of Helen Fischer, Allan Barbara Pease and David Buss). These are the Clinical Psychologists who have done extensive research on the subject of "human mating strategies". There is no denial that humans, are not designed for monogamy. It is already known that human males are polygamous by evolutionary design. Why males only ? Now research shows human females also have a tendency to go for extra marital sex, especially during the days of her ovulation (this is the time, her testosterone peaks). We are apes. Like other apes, Evolution has designed us not for monogamy. That is the reason why when monogamy is imposed on humans there is lot of ceremony involved around it, in the form of marriages.......and oaths etc,. But, Nandita..........what you miss is..........one very important point. That is, a vast majority of human males and females ARE CAPABLE LEADING A 100 % MONOGAMOUS LIVES, though they have biological tendency to behave polygamously. It is well known that a majority of men and a minority of women are always capable of involving in casual sex without commitment with new new partners. But it is only a BIOLOGICAL TENDENCY. We can not shed it out. But we can control the same using our intellect. The said polygamous biological tendency will be there inside us for the next few thousand years at least. Because, to come to this existence, it has taken 35 lakh years of evolutionary modelling. But, repeated social experiments in countless number of cultures worldwide has shown that among all mating strategies, MONOGAMY IS THE BEST one, both for men as well as women...........more so for the children born to them. So an informed adult, is aware of his/her polygamous biological tendencies. Yet, he/she is perfectly CAPABLE OF LEADING A TOTALLY MONOGAMOUS LIFE. That is because of our supreme ability of controlling our basic emotional instincts by our powerful intellect. That is what makes this human ape, distinct from other great apes. Do I make sense, Nandita ? As you are interested in Psychology I recommend a book , "The murderer next door" by Clinical Psyhologist, David Buss. By the time, you finish this book, you will be convinced that there is a murdering instinct inside every one of us. Because, during the course of our Evolution, it gave us definite advantage to have a murdering instinct.............which helped us identify our enemies and kill them. But, we know live in a changed society........which is totally different from the pre-historic situation wherein we lived tens of thousands of years ago. So....notwithstanding the fact that we all have a murdering instinct inside us, we do not justify that it is right..........we do not give a free license to it. Right ? Similarly, the presence of the strong biological tendency of polygamy inside humans does not mean that is the right mating strategy in the present socity.
Well, steve what about the other posts? What is their motive? And what is your motive? It is just sharing of information. I neither seek validation nor am I preaching. This is the trouble with some of us who will not tackle with the issues but prefer to play politics. If you have gone through my posts, you would not have asked this question. Nandita
Thank you very much Indianguy2010. You have provided a lot of food for thought. I am pondering over what you have said. Regards Nandita
Nandita, I am pretty new to this site and so I do not know much about your other posts. Just a small question though: so are you unmarried and living a polygamous life? And your parents are ok with it? Are you going out/having sex with different men in front of your parents, with your head held high? If so, kudos to you dear! And yes, I will go though the videos that you have posted, which I am sure, is the main intent of your thread!
Nandita We have come a long way from the homonids. What worked for them most certainly wont work for us. Multiple partners with no strings attached for better sex /romantic life is one very small part of the equation.For something to go mainstream as an alternative to marriage you need to have a comprehensive solution. U cannot handle one part of a problem and claim to have "the perfect" answer. The biggest flaw in these proposals is the way children and aging population is handled. They are almost an after thought . May be you should read up a bit on the trending down of the population rates in some of these "BOLD" countries and their impact on socio -economical conditions there.The sheer survival of our race...depends on the way we handle some of these tricky issues.
