this is another competition poem how many can join me here ???

sunkan · Feb 18, 2008

My mind relive those painful moments
Time has stood still for me
The rest of the scene has moved
It has been a year
This very place had a look of fear
In my arms withering dear
<o> </o>
The splatter of the rain
Your thoughts I bring back in vain
When I lost you in pain
Now what did I gain
<o> </o>
Will walk to your grave
My mind is now brave
Journey ahead will pave
For you a smile I would save
<o> </o>
Oh! My child you wait for me
With extended arm I see
A time will come when I would be free
Our soul will mingle and freeze
<o> </o>
<o> </o>
<o> </o>
sunkan...

sunkan · Feb 19, 2008

not a single comment how sad is this poem mm sunkan

Anandchitra · Feb 19, 2008

Awesome dear Sundari..so touching..very beautiful..Will definetly win competition..coming in late but i'm catching up and really glad i caught this..keep going woman..

MeenLoch · Feb 19, 2008

" Time has stood still for me
The rest of the scene has moved"

Loved that Ms. Sundari. Frozen time has been well phrased.

And the last para conveys the meaning of soulmate, at death. Simple and heart warming.

Shanvy · Feb 21, 2008

sunkan,

Good one. Though not exactly in the same lines.......

here is my try.hope you approve?

time is a great healer they say
I still feel raw inside sometimes
though it is more than a year
when you left to places not so near

The grasses and the plants
on your grave tell me
<o></o> times does not wait
and there is new gain for
every loss if and only if
I see in the correct places

I am learning to smile,
without starting to cry
without feeling bad
while remembering you
true, time is a great healer

srivatsa · Feb 21, 2008

hi mam,
God's gift of forgetting the pain and moving on with times has been very beautifully described.

Regards
Sri

sunkan · Feb 21, 2008

dear shanthi lovely,
but i wanted u to use some other theme something different fromwhat i thought, it neednt be the same but something too unique like meeting a friend as u pass through, or may be remembering or waiting for your hubby to come over at the other end of the road and u see him walking towards u with that knowing smile and all,, i still loved the poem

ChhayaaN · Feb 25, 2008

sunkan and shanvy,
A good use of words both of you that touched my heart sooooooo very much.My mind was flooded with the memories of my lovely daughter i lost three years ago.
"I AM LEARNING TO SMILE.......'
How wrong I was. I had thought that i have overcome my grief ,the pain only a mother can feel on losing her child!!!!!
"MY CHILD YOU WAIT FOR ME............."My thoughts and my feeling ,you have given words to it.Thank you both .I wish good luck to you to win the competition.GOD BLESS YOU.