THinking of trying for a second child..Pls give your opinions...

I would say the ideal time between the children is around 2-3 years. Then you will have enough time to recover from pregnancy/delivey but the age difference is short enough so the siblings get company from each other. The older child will be jealous in the beginning but the good thing is that the baby is in the beginning mainly sleeping and eating.

 

Perfect timing for a second baby. Make sure u hire a nany once u conceive and also make sure to explain to your elder child that a baby is on its way who would love him/her and would play with him . Yes the first three months are going to be difficult since the baby would be awake most of the times at night but then even that phase passes off. So do not worry and plan for the second .Your child needs a sibling to play and share. All the best.

 

When I prepared for my second pregnancy I considered the below points:-

The age gap between both siblings. I had a son, who was almost 2 when I thought about my second one. When I delivered my second baby (a girl) he was 2yrs and 9 months. I think 2-3 years should be ideal. Because the elder one is not so matured, so it is very easy to make them bond. It is also easy to raise them together, and they will become like good friends.

As for help, I ensured that my mom would come in at least for some 6 months initially. I too had a maid, who cooked for us. We never allowed a 3rd person to do baby stuff, such as putting the baby to sleep, feeding or washing their cloths. So, initially for 1-2 weeks, it was my elderly mom who washed the nappies and handled the baby when I am not there. Later on, I recovered and did everything related to the kids.

Basically it is very important to maintain the bond with your elder one. Since as a new mom, you would be busy with newborn, additional work and sleepless nights. So, please ensure someone is always covering your absence to care your elder one. Such as feeding, helping for school works, playing, bathing and all. Also, ensure someone takes over these works well in advance, so he is not pushed to accept a new care-taker all of a sudden. That will only make him feel bad about the newborn.

In our home, my mom took care of his meals, bathing and getting him ready for his school. My husband took him for the park, bike round and play groups. He was getting used to these stuff when i was still carrying, and less expected my presence for everything. Specially he learnt to sleep with my mom once I put them to sleep at night. He wasn't surprised to see his granny in his bed after all. So, it was too easy for me to handle the new born without much worries.

Tell good stories about the new kid to the elder kid. For instance, you may tell him/her as to how the new one would look exactly like him, how the new one is vulnerable and needs his support all the time. Why it is important as an elder sibling he must take care of his sister and all that. He took it as his responsibility, so never compete with her. Even I would pretend to ask his permission whether to carry the LO or not. He would say, Yes mom... pls carry her, else she would cry.

If you are working, then ensure a good nanny, parental/inlaws support to monitor the nanny or a day care. Also ensure the financial arrangements associated with pregnancy, delivery and afterwards.

Above all, let the nature takes it turns. Wait for the good news. You will eventually find a new self to handle this added responsibility. Dont think too much

 

Annut, i had been trying for a second one for the past many months with no success. Below is what I did:

1. track the cycle and track the ovulation days.
2. Plan financially. Save enough and a little bit more to cover for all the fixed expenditure which you now have for the maternity-leave period time frame.
3. Prepare your body. I completely shifted to healthy food (with exceptions here and there). Go on prenatal vitamins.


this is what have done so far.

 

All the best... Even I am confused with missed period n faint positive pregnancy test this morning... My daughter will be 2 by March.. If this s true.,its totally unplanned, but we ll be happy to go,


Just lazy n sleepy this week..

 

OP-the other posters gave you great advice already. I am writing just to help you make up your mind. My son turned 2 in Oct and we are expecting our second baby in April next year. We wanted to have two kids but weren't prepared yet or weren't even planning. It came as a surprise but I'd say a wonderful surprise. I was taking prenatal because I was still breastfeeding my son. I weaned him 2 months ago (I had to go out of country for a week).
For preparation: my first delivery was an emergency c-section. We handled it all by ourselves. My in-laws could come only for 5 days and out of 5, I was in hospital for 4 days. I didn't ask my parents to come because of old age. Btw, I am 34 now. I talked to my ob-gyn and she thinks we can go for vaginal delivery this time because the incision wasn't too deep last time. Anyway, I am prepared for a c-section. I won't have any help, except for my husband. My son goes to daycare as I work full time. We will keep it as such. I am planning to leave my job in March end and will start again in July. Fortunately, we have enough savings for the extra expense during delivery and for the lost salary for few months.

We took our son to the ultrasound appointment (anatomical scan) to make him aware of the new development. We have few books about 'big brother/sister' that we read to him. He has started talking about his little sister. It is so cute when he says, "I will give my old van to little sister or little sister needs to eat this, mommy". Since it is a low risk pregnancy, I have my doctor's okay to lift and carry my son.
I will let you know how it goes after delivery.
Good luck, OP and Rakhii.

 

TE=whiteroses;3469375]All the best... Even I am confused with missed period n faint positive pregnancy test this morning... My daughter will be 2 by March.. If this s true.,its totally unplanned, but we ll be happy to go,


Just lazy n sleepy this week..[/QUOTE]
Sleepy and tired was how I felt a week before I found out I was pregnant. Your test looks pretty convincing. Congrats!