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There Are Also Good Men And Bad Women! Just Read This!

Discussion in 'Saturdays with Varalotti' started by varalotti, Oct 27, 2006.

  1. varalotti

    varalotti IL Hall of Fame

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    If you had cried...

    Dear cheer,

    If Cheer herself has cried for this story.... well I can pat on my back. But honestly unless you share Surendars love you would not have cried.

    Even before the first reply appeared on this forum one ILite gave me a pm saying that she was shamelessly crying after reading that story. In fact I had to take efforts to hide my tears from my colleagues in the office. That ILite was reminded of her sweet brother in India who is as good as Suren in the story.


    Yes, Cheer, things are changing now. But one thing I have observed with many NRIs and their relations living in India. In fact there was a classical Malayalam movie too on the subject. The head of the family would have been slogging on an offshore oil well for months on end and while returning to India on annual passage he would see his family members fighting for what objects he has brought for them.

    Too much of material wealth at times makes some of us blind to the thing that really matters namely, people.

    One way of getting rid of that attachment is just to see what happens to those things which we have coveted. We lose interest in them after a while.
    I don't agree with your statement that Husbands are more liberal. Their attachment is in different areas. That's all. We have to get into our heart the fundamental truth that "THINGS DON'T MATTER AT ALL."
    Then we can always live a life of contentment and happiness.
    regards,
    sridhar
     
    sindmani likes this.
  2. safa

    safa Bronze IL'ite

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    I am present Sir.

    Very charming story!
    During reading many familiar faces came into mind. This happens in most of the families, I believe. Some writers like you bring them out!
    I have been surprised seeing some husbands like him , who are scared of their wives, even they hesitate to talk in front of their wives.
    What I have felt interacting with family members, relatives, neighbours and friends is that most of the women want to MASTER their husbands. It is may be a kind of possessiveness.. I do not blame the ladies for this habit. It is what they experienced and understood from their home only. Since the first school is our home, the first teacher is our mother, definitely we get some good and bad lessons from there.
    Ladies like Bharathi are few in number.Any way we could say some men and women are good about Surendar and Bharathi.
     
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  3. anjana

    anjana Bronze IL'ite

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    A moving story Sridhar!!!!

    Dear Sridhar,
    I read this with a heavy heart since it brought back many memories in our own family. I think I liked this the best so far since you have written it so close to my heart. The big brother could have taken his own decision to distribute the gifts[when he claims to have] two boxes of gifts. I still can't understand why?

    As for Roopa I am not sure if she is attached to material things or human love.Yes her hubby may be distributing her favourite gifts but I feel she stands in the way of two brothers especially the younger loving one Suren. I adored Suren's wife a lot.This day and age material things seem to be the highest in everybody's mind rather than cherishing love etc..
    Love,
     
    Last edited: Oct 27, 2006
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  4. varalotti

    varalotti IL Hall of Fame

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    Attendance Taken on Record, Madam!

    Thanks for the nice post. A good writer writes only what is happening around him. A fiction is called fiction only for the sake of format. In fact there is no better medium to reflect real life than fiction.
    It takes all types of people to make this world. Just as there are husbands who are scared of their wives, so there are wives who are scared of their husbands. Goodness and badness are evenly distributed between the sexes. Though I would say honestly in a typical Indian set-up a bad husband can do much more damage than a bad wife.
    When the question of mastering one's spouse or possessing one's spouse comes love silently vanishes from the scene.
    It is all easy to say that we are made by our homes and upbringing. But now all the great masters say that our soul at the deepest level chooses the womb it should be born in and the home it should grow up. The great thinker James Allen used to say, don't blame it on your circumstances. Your thoughts become our circumstances. When they are inside your mind they are called thoughts; when they manifest outside they are called circumstances.
    Thanks Shahana, for the nice post.
    regards,
    sridhar
     
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  5. varalotti

    varalotti IL Hall of Fame

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    Thanks, Anjana

    Dear Faultless one,
    This story is taken from real life; it is hot from the central battlefield of life. And when ever a story comes from that place, you tend to see all known characters playing known roles. That explains the liking for this story as well as the heaviness of theart.
    Yes, Bhaiyya could have distributed one box of gifts then and there. Left to himself he would have done that. But I have clearly portrayed the battle his conscience is waging with his wife's command.
    Men or women basically prefer status quo and would go to any extent to sustain it. When there is a bully in one's wife the last thng a man would like to do is to infuriate her and rock the semblance of marriage subsisting between them. This also happens when the wife silently swallows her husbands inequities because she does not want to disturb the status quo.

    All of us are Roopas to some degree, Bhaiyyas to a greater degree and Surendar to a smaller degree. The whole exercise of spiritual growth (if I can use a fancy word here) is to become less of Roopa and more of Surendar and eliminate the conflicts of Bhaiyya. It can happen in a small incident. You see after this incident Bhaiyya's attitude towards his wife, towards life would have changed. Who knows reaching Bangalore he might fight with his wife and instill good sense in her.

    I am surprised to see that material things dominate our mind. In those days when things were scarce it would be all right if we had this attachment. (I remember when I was in school I had to wait for two hours in a queue to get a kg of sugar)
    I think we need to have some mental exercise before we come out of his attachment to things which burns all the love in our hearts.
    Thanks Anjana,
    sridhar
     
  6. Ushakrishnan64

    Ushakrishnan64 Silver IL'ite

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    Next plot...

    Dear Sridhar,
    Suren & Bharti's love touched my heart. But I cannot see any logic in Bhaiyya budging to Roopa's pressure. Please give us a sequel to this story..where B succeeds in driving sense to R...let them make a trip to Chennai & R personally hand over loads of gifts to S & B.
    I hope you will portray a changed Roopa, who appreciates S&B.

    Regards
    USHA
     
    Last edited: Oct 29, 2006
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  7. varalotti

    varalotti IL Hall of Fame

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    There Are Good Men And Good Women! Period!

    Yes, ILites, there are good people, enough of them. And my story which is there in the latest Dinamalar-Varamalar is an explanation of that statement.
    Please use the link below to go to that thread and read the story in Tamil (The English Version of the story is The Scandal; since this is slightly ethnic, better read in Tamil) and leave your comments there.

    http://www.indusladies.com/forums/showthread.php?t=3245

    regards,
    Varalotti
     
    Last edited: Oct 29, 2006
  8. varalotti

    varalotti IL Hall of Fame

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    Ghostwriting!

    Yes, Most Gracious ILites, that's the one-word theme of a short story of mine which has appeared in DH of today.
    I am giving here the link to the thread where the story is introduced, as usual by Chitra, and this thread contains links to read the story.
    Please read the story and let me have your views.

    http://www.indusladies.com/forums/showthread.php?t=3243

    regards,
    Varalotti
     
  9. varalotti

    varalotti IL Hall of Fame

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    A Video Presentation This Time!

    Most Gracious ILites,
    For this Wednesday thread I am saying it with a picture, actually a video. A video which hurt me when I saw it the first time, and hurts me whenever I see it or even think of it.
    This is the disease of the new age and in its effect even worse than Aids. Condoms at least provide some measure of protection against Aids.
    But against this... we are powerless.
    Have a look at the video and give your views, not as a courtesy to your Varalotti, but to discharge your social responsibility.
    Varalotti
     
  10. anushakmurthy

    anushakmurthy New IL'ite

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    Very touching story...yes..i do see such kind of men who gets overruled by thier wives and they are unable to put thier foot down in such aspects with thier spouse and behave rationally. How can one say most decisions are wrong in life including his marriage? Did he even try and make his point clear to his wife or convince her sometime after which he decided to get over ruled or without even attempting for convincing her?

    And, its sad that Roopa doesnt realize the goodwill of her bil and co-sister even after moving with them. I'm sure some or the other occasion she should have experienced a warmth in these two ppl...and why Roopa never acknowledged it and change her mind...

    Good one!

    Cheers!
    -Anushaa
     

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