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The terrible sequel!

Discussion in 'Cheeniya's Senile Ramblings' started by Cheeniya, Oct 17, 2007.

  1. Cheeniya

    Cheeniya Super Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    That I had an awful cerebral haemorrhage is now history. That I am slowly limping back to normalcy is also history, part 2. What is news now is my captivity in a Nazi Concentration Camp. I am like a Jewish prisoner anxiously waiting to find my place in the Schindler’s List! I do not know how many of you are aware what it is like being under Doctor’s Orders. It is like being under Fuehrer’s order, if not worse!

    When Omar Khayyam sang thus:

    The Moving Finger writes; and, having writ,
    Moves on: nor all your Piety nor Wit
    Shall lure it back to cancel half a Line,
    Nor all your Tears wash out a Word of it…



    he probably meant his Doctor’s orders! My Doctor has given a whole list of do’s and dont’s covering the entire gamut of my life for the next three months and if I had been Omar Khayyam I would have poured out my feelings more effectively!

    I can understand his making me a guinea pig to test all the new arrivals in the pharmaceutical industry and prescribing dozens of them. What I like about him is his flair for colours. He never prescribes two capsules of the same colour! I also understand his diet regimen. I am fully aware that as one grows older it’s all less salt, less sugar, less fat, less everything. When even extremely healthy people are slowly switching over to such dull diet, I have no complaint really. I have my principles though. You will never be able to make me drink the juice of arugam pullu (grass) with the offer of another 10 years added to my life! In any case, I am not too demanding in that area and I generally eat whatever is served!

    His restrictions on my movement do not bother me either because I find moving out in this heat and traffic does not appeal to me at all. I don’t know if you are aware of it but the new police chief of Chennai is making most of the roads one-way and, anyone venturing out without full knowledge of these restrictions are likely to pay as heavy a price as Abhimanyu paid when he ventured into the Chakravyuham without knowing how to come out! I have my I Pod and lots of lilting music to keep me confined to home for a while. And by the way, I can never be tired of good music.

    He has permitted me some time daily to engage myself in my most favourite activity and you know what it is! It is interacting with my dear ILites that is acting twice as fast as all the medicines that I take daily in restoring me to my normal health. I know that your eyebrows are now raised and you are wondering what is it then that I am cribbing about if every thing is acceptable to me. I’ll tell you all. After all, I too need someone to air my grievance.

    It is my Doctor’s fear that because I had suffered a haemorrhage, I might get a blackout or something and so doesn’t want me to be unattended for the next few days. You may not appreciate the enormity of this condition if you don’t understand what it really means. It means that you are prohibited from bolting the bath room door when you have your bath! Of course, as a school boy in Triplicane, I have gone through this experience because the bathrooms of that multifamily tenement had no doors at all. Whoever occupied the bathroom made his or her presence felt through some loud singing or chanting of mantras depending upon the age of the occupant. As I moved on in my life, among other luxuries of life that I could afford, a bathroom with a door was one. Years of that luxury have taken away my zest for such adventure as taking bath at unprotected places.

    So ever since I got discharged from the hospital, morning times have become my most difficult time. What used to be my most exhilarating activity of the mornings has now become nightmarish or if you like it put that way, daymarish! For a man who loves keeping his shower in full blast, I now keep it very subdued in order that I may not miss out even a faint knock on the door. The main problem with my bathroom door is that it is hypersensitive to the movement of all the doors in the house. If any of them opens or closes suddenly, this door opens wide to find out the reason. More scientifically inclined of you might attribute it to the change in air pressure within the house but the fact remains that the door does open! So I have to be on my toes to ensure that, whenever such a calamity occurs, the door is shut again and my privacy is restored.

    To those of you who think that the moment you are inside the privacy of your bathroom, it’s all nothing but a happy story of a man in his highest spirits, I would draw their attention to what Poet Burns wrote, “The best laid schemes o' mice an' men, Gang aft agley’, gang aft agley in simpler English meaning, ‘Can go awry’! Taking bath with the door unbolted is risky enough even if the entire operation goes without a hitch but if something ‘gang aft agley’, all hell can break loose! Like it happened to me this morning. It all started as innocuously as any other bath. I entered the bathroom with towel and a fresh cake of Mysore Sandal and put them in their allotted places. Remembering my Doctor’s instruction not to keep the door bolted inside, I broke out into a song instead to caution people outside that the operation has commenced. As the first mug of water hit me, I warmed to the heart rending love song of Md.Rafi, Suhani Raat Dal Chuki. It was when I was soaping my bearded face and the lather got into my eyes as usual that the calamity struck me. The soap suddenly shot off from my palm to land at an undisclosed destination.

    People who have faced such a piquant situation in their lives would be aware that a soap would slip out of the hand only when you are not in a position to open your eyes and it invariably lands at the most inaccessible part of the bathroom. I began the retrieval operation by getting on my knees with one of my feet touching the bucket, emulating the example of the Hunter-sage Kannappa Nayinar, and combing the floor with my palms stretching myself as far as I could. It did not strike me that it would be easier to search with my eyes open after washing off the soap! Eventually I did just that and yet the soap was nowhere in sight. I got on to my knees to continue the search and finally found it behind the sink. I stretched myself in full to retrieve it and in the process lost my balance and fell face downwards. It was precisely at this moment that my wife alarmed by the sudden stopping of my music opened the door a bit and saw me stretched in full on the floor. The scream that she let out brought everyone scurrying to the bathroom and I felt extremely silly.

    I do not know if you are aware of the fact how effective a tool a wet soap can be in gathering even the most stubborn dirt off the bathroom floor. The soap that I retrieved had a great assortment of dirt sticking to it and looked more difficult to clean than the Aegean Stable. I decided to abandon it and aborted my bath midway. I emerged out of the bathroom totally bruised not on my torso but in my spirit.

    I am now waiting for my Doctor to clear me completely to do what I want and a refreshing bath in the cool shower of my bathroom, securely latched of course, is what I miss most!




     
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  2. Sriniketan

    Sriniketan IL Hall of Fame

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    Can't stop :rotfl:rotflCheeniya Sir. but the situation you were in makes me feel bad for you. If your are in Mrs. Cheeniya's shoes ( don't ask me when did she wear shoes) you know it is a way of expression, you and I and whoever is in that situation would have done the same.
    By the way, you are not hurt, right? or is it the way you are going to say ' kizhae vizhundhaalum meesaiyil or in this case dhaadiyil soap ottalae'

    Be careful, sir, with lot of restrictions going around you. It is for your own good, isn;t it!
    sriniketan
     
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  3. Tamildownunder

    Tamildownunder Bronze IL'ite

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    Dear Cheeniya sir,

    Although you have narrated your plight heroically and humourously, still my heart goes out to you for having to put up with so much restrictions. Anyway, these restrictions are for your betterment so that you can rock IL much more once you are through with the doctor's restrictions.

    I had been in your plight when few months after landing in London, I had a fracture in my leg and the doctor who put me on cretches told that I had to be bed-ridden for six weeks. This happened at the beginning of spring season and already I had planned to visit the famous Kew gardens, Hampton Palace flower show and most importantly to go to Lords to watch the ashes contest between Australia and Engalnd. Also, I was worried that my work in the lab. would be suspended for six weeks and I may not get paid. One other thing was that I had booked my air ticket to go to New York to attend to my son's graduation from New York University. My heart was broken and I prayed to all the deities I knew and I must have offered to give off my hair at Thirupathi, put vada mala to Anjaneya, kozhukattais to Vinayaka etc. The six weeks went off and in between I managed to visit New York also since there is excellent wheel chair facilities at both Heathrow and JFK. The graduation ceremony was at Madison Square Gardens and the organisers put a special lady escort for me and had reserved a seat in the front row. If I had not got the fracture, I would not have enjoyed these things.

    Regarding bathroom scene, it recently happened to me the same experience as you have described. I bolted the door ofcourse and was opening the hot water faucet, it came off pulling me down with a jet of hot water which gushed at me. I was stunned at this and soon the bath tub overflowed and the bath room was getting filled with water which started spilling to the adjacent room where there is carpet. I did not know where the valve was located and the maintannence people took their own time to come. Later the maintanence people told that the water had seeped to the apartments down also and they had a tough time cleaning.

    Like you I am also an addict to music and hear with my ipod. If you want to hear particular songs and they are not available with you, you can send me the list like 'neyar viruppam'. I will be only too glad to send them to you. I have made my own collections like 'mazhai padalkal', 'thathuva paadalkal', 'duppnkuthu paadalakal' etc.

    I am sure you will come out of this phase strongly.

    Regards,

    TDU
     
  4. Jananikrithsan

    Jananikrithsan Gold IL'ite

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    Sri Sir,
    That was an absolutely humorous account that can be aptly titled 'Evading Soap'. Hope you are in the best of health, knowing you even that is less to expect. With so many restrictions I think you must be more careful and you cannot blame Indira mam for screaming, she must have gotten terrified. This post that you are back with a bang, not literally.
     
  5. Cheeniya

    Cheeniya Super Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear Sri
    Dont you worry! I did not exactly fall but my knees just slipped and I assumed the prostrating position and ,like Janagaraj in 'Aboorva Sagotharargal' pretended as if I did it deliberately and it was not an accident!
    My beard was already full of lather and how can I say 'Keezhe vizhundalum dhadila soap ottale'?
    Sri:-D
     
  6. Cheeniya

    Cheeniya Super Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear TDU
    To tell you the truth, I am enjoying this forced rest and all the attention. Grrrrrr....:bang
    There are occasions when one envies a person confined to the wheel chair and your Madison Square Graduation ceremony was one such! I do hope that the escort assigned to you increased the level of envy in the crowd!

    Your bathroom scene sounded very much like the toilet scene in Peter Seller's classic film 'The Party' when he flushes the toilet after use. The flush never stops and the whole house gets flooded! These are moments to cherish really!

    And thanks a lot for your words wishing me speedy recovery. Your repertoire of songs is further proof what a man of taste you are! For someone like you, there should never be a dull moment in life!
    Sri
     
  7. Cheeniya

    Cheeniya Super Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear Janani
    Thank you! I am in the best of health though the feeling is similar to what a parrot in a golden cage would be having! Still I am trying to make the best of what I have!
    Indra mam did scream but not like the heroine of Psycho in the climax where the scream scares you more than the situation itself!
    Sri
     
  8. Chitvish

    Chitvish Moderator IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear Sri,
    Please find out from your neuro physician, whether there is any special nerve to trigger the sense of humour in a person - if so, the same has begun over working after the recent history.:tongue
    On reading your bathroom episode, I laughed loudly & uncontrollably, sitting in front of the computer.:rotfl
    Vish who was taking his bath shouted "What is happening? Are you O K ?".
    You have enjoyably described that your doctor has a flair for colours. I pity you, my poor friend, you are not aware of a reaction it has set forth ! There is one particular capsule (according to Ms Sri), which has two lovely colours, not exactly contrasting, but complementing each other very well.
    Now, your wife has decided that she wants to buy a saree in the same colour combination for Deepavali !
    Howzzaatt?
    One of these days, we have decided to set forth to Nalli, RMKV.... the list is too long for me to type.
    So, when you are appreciating the aesthetic sense of your physician, be prepared for the damage that will be done to your purse !
    Oh, the song on Suhani Rat (absolute melody!) to be heard in the bathroom ? No wonder, your thoughts were "rewound" and you fell down, whatever you attempted to do! Set the ipod to a different "bathroom tune", to be on the safer side !
    Now you must thank God, that there was no bathtub, a la western style, in the bathroom. You are likely to have knocked your head with a real bruise. Thank God for "no bathtub" mercies !
    You are back, not just with a bang, but a real great bang.( I am resisting the temptation for a particular smilie !:-D)
    Love,
    Chithra.
     
  9. Shanvy

    Shanvy IL Hall of Fame

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    HI Sri,

    Looks like you are getting the best Convalescent Care:tongue if you are back with a bang.

    I read this in the morning. but it triggered a lot of negative memories. so went off..did not reply...

    ...i only could relate to your wife...thank god for small mercies...you did not hurt yourself...
    When we were in delhi, my son was 1 year old... veda took him to the bathroom in the middle of the night..within seconds ..i just heard a big bang..and son crying...i just ran in....and i find veda sprawled on the bathroom floor...unconscious...but what if he had locked the door..i shudder even today .....(though it was an effect of his spondilytis acting)....


    Regarding the colors of the tablets...thank your doctor once again for the color code. it is boon in disguise..think what would happen if you take 2 of bp tablets.. and your bp goes southward in spiral.....:tongue.

    I feel you are getting the much needed and neglected rest your body is demanding and you are actually enjoying it.

    I think abhimanyu's chakravyuham was better than todays traffic in chennai...:bang.....

    I think god has programmed into man that the acoustics of the bathroom suits all ...so all can be bathroom singers without any ............:tongue
     
  10. Anandchitra

    Anandchitra IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear Chenniya Sir
    No one can write with such exemplary (sp??) humor as you can.
    I am sitting for a few minutes afternoon break when i thought i'll check
    your rambling thread to see if you have rambled or not recently
    Lo and Behold so have you and what with incredible humor
    that I am rolling on the floor laughing and laughing :rotfl:rotfl
    to which my son rushes to ask "has chitvish posted a new recipe?"
    (no malice intended) so ofcourse i have to laugh more at this
    new turn of events that reading your post landed (read slipped) me in
    You are so great that even readers are able to bring out humor pen
    like Bhargavi with "kizkae vizhundhaalum...." line and Janani calling the
    thread "Evading soap" to name a few.
    I also want to join Chitvish and Co. for the saree color shopping
    maybe online?????? trust women to bring any narration
    around to clothes I also thought of the same reading your lines
    and lo and behold namesake thought also the same:tongue
    So among the incredibly crafted thread how can we not
    miss noting the notables like Omar Khayyam, Schindler,
    Abhimanyu, Poet Burns, Md.Rafi, and last but not the least
    kannappa Nayinar OMG :clap :clap
    Only you could with such deft skill draft this unique masterpiece
    weaving thru the list f who's who not only in English ltt. but
    in our heritage to touching even the Nayinar.
    Taking print out as i write to share with my D.(guess what D stands for)
    Thanking God that you are safe and sound with family.
     
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