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The Plus And Minus Of Joint Family

Discussion in 'Snippets of Life (Non-Fiction)' started by sunkan, Sep 17, 2007.

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  1. Sep 19, 2007 #11
    subbutr

    subbutr Senior IL'ite

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    Our Dear Sunkan,

    Well refined topic with valid points to share with... I am from the Joint family and still remains with it.

    The charm of close relationships & a bonding of mutual respects makes it more vibrant.

    Once we give our thoughts to :


    Who are we ?, Where are we ?" " Are We useful to someone " are the basics to remain in joint families.

    As such the joint families have lots of advantages & at times due to compulsions, employments and various factors present day families are scattered.

    There is bound to be little difference of opinions among family members and it has to be adjusted to realize the fruits of joint family.

    More patience, tollerence and give & take policy is a must in joint family concepts.

    Elders advices at times comes in handy...to feel & experiance the joint family, one has to be lucky enough.

    We have seen number of joint families happt & successfully led their life from our past experiances and around us.

    Listening to every members views in the family before taking a final decision is a must for a success.

    Interactions among family members by the way of communicating with each other leads to perfect understanding.

    subbu
     
    subbutr, Sep 19, 2007
    subbutr, Sep 19, 2007
    #11
  2. Sep 19, 2007 #12
    sunkan

    sunkan Gold IL'ite

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    dear bala,
    today the educated woman changed the society, and more aged homes and likes are minting money, the woman has taken a great change, what they show in tv and all is bukwaas actually woman have taken a good lead and dontwant to put up with nonsense, and the older lot also dont want the change, that is y now all the beautiful things of adjusting and sharing has been dumped for independance and the children, are committing suicide, and drugs and alchohol is on a rampage, extra marital affair is on the high,as there is none to pull up the guys collar...sunkan
     
    sunkan, Sep 19, 2007
    sunkan, Sep 19, 2007
    #12
  3. Sep 19, 2007 #13
    sunkan

    sunkan Gold IL'ite

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    dear subbu those were the days, yes interference is there, is the nuclear running without interferance, we had a moral backing ...sunkan
     
    sunkan, Sep 19, 2007
    sunkan, Sep 19, 2007
    #13
  4. Sep 20, 2007 #14
    Kamalji

    Kamalji IL Hall of Fame

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    Sunkan,

    Great article, u have given both sides to it.

    I still feel joint family is good,but may be not practicle.We 4 brothers, mom dad, granny, grannys mom, uncle and Aunt, thats 10 of us, lived in two room apratment with one toilet.But those were the happiest days of our lives.At night i used to sit with dad and uncle and listen to their business talks, and with granny arounmd it used to be so much fun.

    But today, look around.Sad to see elderly being neglected,sad sad sad.

    Regards.kamal
     
    Kamalji, Sep 20, 2007
    Kamalji, Sep 20, 2007
    #14
  5. Sep 20, 2007 #15
    krishnaamma

    krishnaamma Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    Hi Priti,

    You are too good . :yes: You are saying frankly and it is not bad. As you said we can take care and love each other by staying seperate. No doubt about this. That is called in Tamil 'thamarai elai thanier' in English we can say
    'Attached detached '. I lived in joint family and now we are living seperate. As Veda said, the sucess of the joint family is in the hands of the head of the family and he must be a good man with out any [FONT='Calibri','sans-serif']making any partial decisions. He must treat all the family members equaly. But ...now a days all are selfish and no body can lead the show. That is the problem. [/FONT]
    [FONT='Calibri','sans-serif']You asked one question, why boys like joint family and not girls. Because we girls want to run the show and we want immediate credit for our working which is not possible in joint family. For boys they dont expect any encouraging words from the family members. They want somebody must take care of them while they return from the office. They dont bother about whom it is , it may be mother, sister, brother's wife or own wife. correct?:-D[/FONT]
    [FONT='Calibri','sans-serif'][/FONT]
     
    krishnaamma, Sep 20, 2007
    krishnaamma, Sep 20, 2007
    #15
  6. Sep 20, 2007 #16
    Vysan

    Vysan Gold IL'ite

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    Dear Sunkan,

    I may tend to disagree with you.... But with people going more on the materialistic side...... I dont want to comment without evidence.... My friend and his brother are staying together only....

    So...Again I would like to reiterate that it is upon the mindset of the ladies in the family and how the menfolk deal with all differences...

    Veda
     
    Vysan, Sep 20, 2007
    Vysan, Sep 20, 2007
    #16
  7. Sep 20, 2007 #17
    sunkan

    sunkan Gold IL'ite

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    DEAR VEDA,
    Sila nerangalil sila manidargal, we have them all over, but on a mass general trend when u study, u feel the nuclear family out of materialistic greed has left behind the domination plus the loving lots.

    you think there is no difference in a nuclear family, u have no difference with wife or husband, domination, it is there every where but we have limited ourselves to agree to abide by our limited numbers, and not agree for the lot,
    the woman's ego is very higher here, they dont agree and rule over, so we find the children also go the parents way.

    you r served what u cooked, is the answer, tomorrow the generation has followed our actions well, and would follow only what has been seen, very rarely we find children going in search of the grandparents, for solace as the parents have no time for them...sunkan
     
    sunkan, Sep 20, 2007
    sunkan, Sep 20, 2007
    #17
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