I am laughing at all the responses to my suggestion of hugging the MIL. I agree it will be really strange to suddenly hug her especially if you have never done it before. But if it is a right moment (momentous occasion perhaps??) maybe it may not be so strange- something special But you are right from day 1 may not be strange. It is great to have good relationship with IL's and not to treat or be treated warily. I would rather extend a hand of love but at the same time never take crap from anyone. My mantra is -be good to me and I am golden to you and that extends to everyone.