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Talked to my husband about my moms situation..

Discussion in 'Parents & Siblings' started by sonika1976, Dec 19, 2013.

  1. sonika1976

    sonika1976 Junior IL'ite

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    Shocked beyond belief...

    I posted "worried about my mother" in one thread and decided I talk to my husband about the same. I thought what else is a partner for if we cant share our worries. I was totally wrong.

    He told me that after marriage, I should love him and my son more. He does not like me talking to my mom online and also thinks my mom shows fake love when she calls my son.

    He told me, if I cared to much, I should have stayed back in India and why did I have to return from the recent trip.

    He also said that he has not stopped anyone from coming to the US. He can afford to feed two people only and if "people" want to stay here.. it should be on their own dime not his.

    I cannot fathom a husband saying this. I am afraid and wondering what I should do next. I was not expecting this response.

    My friend told me, I am wasting my time with him. How can I take away a son from his father. Too many thoughts, too much confusion.

    Please help calm me down from this shock.
     
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  2. sweetshreya

    sweetshreya IL Hall of Fame

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    Why does fate put people in such difficult situations? If your husband was understanding and supportive, things would have been much easier. But he is being a jerk, if he is saying things like these. Now the question is: are you working? If not, can you start earning? If you can, his one point about 'people not staying on his dime' will become moot. If you cannot work, have you thought about returning to India and start working there? It will be hard on your son, but money seems to be your only problem. And the only way to solve this is you earn and then take responsibility of your mom.
     
  3. Rihana

    Rihana IL Hall of Fame

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    Try to recall the nice things your husband has done. That might make you feel less bad about his current statements. Was he at one time open to the idea of your mom living in a house near you? Have you been able to invite your mom to stay with you for two months every other year or so? Try to understand why he might have said what he did - did your mom apologize or explain about calling you both homeless, jobless and him a transgender?

    He could have been more understanding and just provided a patient ear to your problem. But, going by the history in your previous threads, there are too many issues and his reaction might have stemmed from those.
     
  4. thegirlygirl

    thegirlygirl Platinum IL'ite

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    Dear Sonika,

    I went through all your threads, and my heart really goes out to you.

    I don't have much to say......May God give you the strengh to carry on.

    God Bless.
     

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