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Super Super Stressed..

Discussion in 'General Discussions' started by anika987, Jan 30, 2020.

  1. anika987

    anika987 Finest Post Winner

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    Guys..got a job.not a big salary but some
    Benefits.Its 8.30am to 3 pm.it is half hour drive to and fro.

    Recently hubby got a good salary hike and other perks and he works crazy to establish himself.Last year he had a drastic job change and this salary hike is a ego boost to him.

    A problem has cropped up..

    I need to inform the manager if am taking up the job and he wants me to come in tomorrow to meet another manager so that can make the final decision.

    Today my kid fell sick and the school made me pick her up..she is home right now and Has fever.She can’t go to School tomorrow.I asked my hubby if he can work from home Tomorrow and he blasted me on phone.

    He said he is in a high stress job already,trying to prove himself and works one and half hours away from home.Also,at this time he cannot work from home as his team needs him.For emergency stuff related kid,he cannot make it and help and he does not want me to take up any job until kids grow up.He was extremely angry.He says he can’t step down in this time of his career and he wants me to understand that.


    Am facing a lot of mental stress these days.To top it..my fate I keep meeting people who trigger me.A lady in my fitness center keeps cribbing that I should take up a job and only then kid will respect me and that my husband is not understanding enough to accommodate.

    By mistake,I told this to my husband and he was furious..he simply told me that I can take all the money, leave the kid with him and go back to India or wherever I want and look for the best job and please the world.If I talk about job more time until daughter grows up, he will Divorce me.

    one thing led to another and I told him if the other guys can accommodate and work around wife schedule why can’t you?He still calmly said their work
    Life or priorities or commute maybe different..

    I could not let it go..fight went on for a while,words exchanged and
    He just banged the phone down.

    I am stunned.

    I am happy at home but somehow I cringe when some people are constantly annoying me as to why am working or not..even had women say I wish I was at home like you so I don’t need to Do anything..

    It’s been few days since I have cooked anything properly and today hubby is upset,kid is sick now..my stress level and his is sky high..

    I have to call the manager and said I can’t make it..I am so scared I will never find a a job again after many years..
    Very tired of explaining myself to others.Every woman is mostly a working woman.

    honestly am not even thinking right now..am fuming and super stressed.
     
    Last edited: Jan 30, 2020
    Amulet likes this.
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  2. RRAJ

    RRAJ Bronze IL'ite

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    Anika, you should be happy getting a supportive husband. You have to support him to back to achieve his goals in his career. Your family is most important than any other third persons comments. If you chose going to job for others satisfaction instead of not listening to your husband, you will have to face the consequences. Nobody will come to save your life. So better enjoy the time and use the time wisely by studying something until kid grows up.
     
    pinkydarling, Sunshine04 and anika987 like this.
  3. anika987

    anika987 Finest Post Winner

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    Will I get some job after such a long gap?
     
  4. RRAJ

    RRAJ Bronze IL'ite

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    Definitely you will get a job. There is no age bar for getting a job in this country. Use the time wisely to study to get a better paying job. Your family happiness is more important. Don't lose it for others comments. As your husband saud each persons priorities will be different. Don't compare with anyone. If your family life is in trouble nobody whoever made the comments won't come to save you. Just be happy and support your husband for now.
     
    Topaz49, Sunshine04 and anika987 like this.
  5. MalStrom

    MalStrom IL Hall of Fame

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    Didn’t you just post something similar recently?
     
    Sri2196, Sunshine04 and anika987 like this.
  6. anika987

    anika987 Finest Post Winner

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    Yes malstrom and the fights are escalating by the day:(

    We used to be Happy..not it is so stressful..

    As I mentioned in this thread,I got another job but since kiddo fell sick and hubby says he can’t help me etc ..fight is happening..
     
  7. anika987

    anika987 Finest Post Winner

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    The mental agony is killing..and no one is happy in the family now:(
    Am supporting him but he wants to be wait till kid reaches middle school
     
  8. AppuMom

    AppuMom Silver IL'ite

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    I had multiple breaks at job front.I somehow managed to do entry level jobs each time.There is lot of beginner level jobs if you are not particular about position or big salary.If you had a career earlier there are some programs which will help you to return. One example is this.Do not worry.Keep trying
    Career Re-entry Programs
     
    anika987 likes this.
  9. Swetha52003

    Swetha52003 Silver IL'ite

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    Anika,
    Seems like this job is super important to you in proving your self worth to society. Well,I am not judging that. Many of the posters here already given their advices on that matter in so many of your threads. First calm down and ask yourself is this job worth the time away from your sick child and a terribly upset husband.If your answer is yes,well go ahead.Find a trustworthy nanny for the kid at first. Maybe someone who is ready to help with pickup from school etc.If the money is not an issue,I am sure you can find someone nice. If you are going to work, you cannot rely on your husband alone for child care. Maybe he can help on some days, not always with his stressful job,right? You need a strong reliable child care option. First sort that out!
     
  10. RRAJ

    RRAJ Bronze IL'ite

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    Don't worry too much and lose your family happiness. If I am right, after you started looking for jobs by looking at other working women and hearing their comments you all started losing your happiness. Everyone's lifestyle is different. As Appumom said you can look for entry level job when you look for job again when child grows up. It will be little bit difficult but its not impossible one in this country
     
    anika987 likes this.

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