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Strange problem

Discussion in 'Friends & Neighbours' started by 1Sandhya, Aug 5, 2015.

  1. 1Sandhya

    1Sandhya Platinum IL'ite

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    Hello friends,

    Lately I have been running into this issue a lot! Both with random casual acquaintances and also some friends. In the past few months it has happened enough that it is beginning to bother me. So I thought maybe I will post it here and you can give me some of your great inputs which will enable some perspective for me.

    The issue is that I keep catching people in silly random lies, lies told by them for no apparent reason that I can see at least. For eg., I had to meet an acquaintance and give him some papers as requested by my friend. I know this person very casually, not well at all. So I contacted him with a suggested day and place. He replied that he cannot meet me on that day as it is his daughters birthday so a different day same place for the exchange. I agreed, we met, he again repeated so sorry my dd's bday blah blah, I was like ok, whatever, I handed over papers, then some other casual conversation happened during which I asked him how many kids do you have and he replied I have 2 boys. Then he suddenly stopped speaking and looked away with an extremely odd expression ( he was embarrassed) and I couldnt understand why for a minute and then it clicked in my head. :idontgetit:

    Another incident was with my distant relative. She visited me recently and we were alone at home and she was telling me in great detail about all her problems and how tough her life is blah blah. Then her h comes in and tells me stuff which directly contradicts whatever she was telling me earlier. I was puzzled and objected but but... She looks abashed for a sec and has the cheek to tell me 'oh I was testing to see if you were really paying attention!?' Her h tells me bluntly 'dont believe everything she tells you.' :idontgetit:

    There are similar incidents with other people. These are all adults ok. Grown ups, holding down jobs, with families etc, so presumably able to handle responsibility and accountability one would think. So why do this? People making up stories simply, not just exaggerating or embroidering incidents, I mean, outright fiction, or telling silly random lies for no reason that I can understand. Why lie about such silly harmless things for no reason at all? Have you run into such people too? Any ideas? Oh and btw these people are all Indian.
     
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  2. VanithaSudhir

    VanithaSudhir Platinum IL'ite

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    Oh Sandhya !! Recently it was raining 'lies' in my life too . :)

    I very recently had a very close encounter with such a person . This person keeps forgetting what lies she told and used to tell a different lie on a different day. Everything about her was fake. She used to fake her personal life as well as work life. I usually used to ignore such people and their lies. But I had to bust that person, since her lies were causing lot of damage to other's reputation.

    The more they are busted, the more lies start emanating from them like a volcano. They also start accusing and correlating irrelevant incidents to hide their embarrassment and end up telling more lies. :). I had to put a period to that unrelenting volcano of lies by blocking that person from communicating further. But I was glad to bust that liar.

    And yes you are right. For silly nothings, they create unbelievable stories. And the funniest part is them thinking that the other person is believing their stories. We try to act polite by listening to their stories...but they think that we are into their fiction and enact more.. :)

    I usually used to stay away from such people. Like it goes 'You have to be a fool to talk to a fool'..Likewise 'we have to be a liar to talk to liars'... We can't do much about these people, except tell it on their face that we are not interested in their lies and have better things to do. (Of course, they would get annoyed if they are busted and spin stories about us and start spreading it...) No end to it. :)

    Well my conclusion, is you are not alone.. So many of us are sailing in the same boat. Either Ignore them or Bust their lies. :)
     
    Sairindhri, 1Sandhya and Vasundhra like this.
  3. 1Sandhya

    1Sandhya Platinum IL'ite

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    OMG! Vanitha you are so right!

    And the funniest part, as you said, is not keeping track of their own lies! Why lie then? Why not say 'I'm busy' and leave it at that? That is what I dont understand. We are all adults here isnt it?

    I have a couple friends like your friend too! They also appear to be existing in their own version of alternate reality. I just ignore them entirely. You know the funny thing is whenever one of them comes over with her h, that man will continually ask my h for confirmation about everything I stated. shakehead I would say something, immediately he turn to my h and ask 'is this true?' not so bluntly but indirectly seeking confirmation! So sad no? I got so pissed once I wanted to tell him, 'not all women are liars like your wife,' but I bit my tongue and kept quiet.
     
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  4. VanithaSudhir

    VanithaSudhir Platinum IL'ite

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    Alternate Reality !! Yeah ..,ha ha.ha.

    There are many psychological conditions..

    Most of these lies are told because of their inferiority complex and basic insecurities. Some of them want to show that they are better than us. They close the eyes and assume that it is dark for everyone. :) ..

    Some lie to create sympathy. So they constantly fake their health in a group to get attention and also escape citing health reasons when caught red handed with their rendezvous with lies.. :)

    I somehow can't stand liars because they are untrustworthy.....be it family or public.
    It is funny that they think the rest of the world is dumb and believing them. Probably they get a kick out of fooling people and get entertained :)... They will also have a group who believe their lies and get exploited.....
     
    Sairindhri likes this.

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