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Strange Dilemmas

Discussion in 'Friends & Neighbours' started by nayidulhan, Sep 29, 2020.

  1. nayidulhan

    nayidulhan Bronze IL'ite

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    Hi Friends!
    Life is so strange. Sometimes it seems so difficult and complicated and at other times it looks like something very simple to handle!
    In the past few months due to the lockdown, I got a chance to interact with most of my neighbours more closely. We are a large community, almost like a small town in ourselves! I want to share a few snippets of my neighbours' lives with you. If possible, please suggest your ideas to handle them.

    1) This is a family of 4- a young man, his wife and their two kids spaced 2 years apart. The lady is a homemaker and the man has erratic work schedules (due to the nature of his work). There are days when he leaves for work at 9 am and returns by 7pm. But most of the times he leaves at (or after) noon and returns after 10pm. The wife says that sleep has always been dear to her and she cannot function well without a good night's sleep. She has to wake up at 6:30am to set things up for the day and to get the kids set for their e-schools. She says she wants to go to bed by 10:30-11 which is not possible with her husband's schedule. So she's tired and weary all through the day.

    2) An elderly couple, their son, DIL and grandson make a lovely set of neighbours for all of us. Uncle's hearing capacity has deteriorated over the years and so he needs to be talked to loudly. He watches TV on a high volume. When Uncle is relaxing on the patio and watching the video clips that he receives as Whatsapp forwards, Aunty can hear them clearly even from the Kitchen or the innermost bedroom. Now, the problem is she had developed some sort of discomfort around loud noises in her pre-menopausal phase which continues to this day. Loud noises or even when people speak loudly and animatedly, give Aunty palpitations.

    3) Another lady who incidentally is recently widowed, has a son and a daughter. Her husband was a doctor (private practitioner) and her son has chosen to walk on his father's footsteps. He's placed as a surgeon in a reputed hospital here. The daughter has studied management in an Ivy League Univ and is doing absolutely well in life. She's settled abroad and has chosen to live life on her own terms (with all her values intact). This lady always tells everyone how she was involved at every stage of her kids' studies, exams, careers, etc. That she knows absolutely everything about schools and career planning, etc. Last week, a neighbour whose own elder daughter is studying in a medical school, asked this lady for guidance for her younger daughter. (The younger daughter wants to pursue an MBA from an Ivy League and settle abroad, just like the lady's daughter). The lady replied that studying abroad is no longer a lucrative option and that the younger daughter should be encouraged to take up some civil services course like IAS, IRS, etc. She was not willing to divulge the minutest detail about the career path of her daughter (she speaks comfortably about her son's career path though).

    4) 2 sisters and their respective families are neighbours. Both the sisters have a son each. The boys are almost of the same age. Outwardly, both the families look content and similar in most of the aspects of life. The boys have similar luxuries in life. However, the older sister always talks to everyone. She is always curious about other people's personal matters and her son too is always eavesdropping on adult conversations. The younger sister does not talk to people much but is very kind and helpful with even the most difficult of things. (Once a neighbour had a slight fever (regular influenza, we found out later) and everyone was scared but this lady covered herself well and visited that neighbour to take his temperature and to enquire after his health). Her son is smart and doing well at studies. Older sister is always complaining about her sister and nephew how they don't mingle around and "socialize"! I find this trange and feel like talking about it to her but I dont know what to say. I know it's none of my business but I cant stand anyone bad mouthing such a kind and helpful person!

    There are more such things that make me want to sort things out for my neighbours. Not sure how much I can/should help as I am not certain what could be perceived as help and what could be perceived as interference!
     
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  2. netflx

    netflx Silver IL'ite

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    Exactly, maintain the cordial relationship, do not interfere unless they ask you for help. If you want, you can suggest to them that they can feel free to reach out to you should they need any help.
     
  3. Rihana

    Rihana IL Hall of Fame

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    A 25 minute nap in the middle of the day with phone in "Do not disturb" can do wonders.

    Bluetooth headphones for the TV and earbuds to use with phone.

    Easily accord others a graceful way out when they seem reluctant to share something. They will thank you silently for the kindness.

    Blood is thicker than the water in any community or small town, no matter how close the townspeople are. Stay out of it or you will become the bad person.

    I half thought you are being funny, but from the little I recall of your posts, you are actually serious here. Two words: Don't. There are more pleasurable and satisfying to-do's in life, such as catching up on pending Netflix.
     
    shreepriya and blindpup10 like this.
  4. nayidulhan

    nayidulhan Bronze IL'ite

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    Thanks netflx! I will keep that in mind! :)
     
  5. nayidulhan

    nayidulhan Bronze IL'ite

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    Rihana!
    I just love... love... love... your easy and instant solutions. Thanks a lot. But what I loved the most is your last line there. I will follow it strictly and go back to my business! Thanks for saving me from any unwanted future troubles! :) :*
     
    shreepriya and Rihana like this.

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