Stillness In Chaos!

The moon looks beautiful and full on this chilly early morning. I know I want to capture the beauty instead I am caught up wondering how she does that time and again, appear as beautiful I mean! I have had a good workout, enjoyed the silence of the early morning with the beautiful view of the moon and am ready to take on the day. I open the mail to see there is a message, well a few but one I need to respond to right away and I find myself putting that smile on my face into the words I am typing. It is an amazing feeling and I hope the receiver feels that smile. It makes me wonder if I can spread that kind of joy and if so, how - that the moon, the rising or even the setting sun seem to spread in people’s lives. Some people do come to mind whose memories light up my eyes and I am ever grateful for their presence in my life.

Absentmindedly after that, I go to my junk folder. I have been one of those fortunate souls who barely received junk. Until a week or so ago. As if to make me feel included I have begun to get a ton of junk. Initially, I found some kind of a thrill and even felt stupid as I sat marking through mail and reporting as spam. Yes, go figure! I even found it meditative as I did this equating it to watching each negative thought, acknowledging it and letting it pass – deleting it. This wisened me pretty quickly for simply the junk mail was more relentless in its speed than the negative thoughts. Phew! Thank goodness for that. If you are wondering about the wisening part, here’s what happened. I quickly realized that it was easier to skim through them, mark all, un-check the ones that actually matter and delete the rest. Simply keeping only those that mattered, yes just like those positive thoughts – isolate them and hold on to them. If you are laughing at my naivety, that is the idea my friend ;-)

Well, coming back to the workout I just had that morning, I hear the instructor go, yes none other than my gym one “Look at your neighbors, see if you can overtake them”. I look around and smile, easy! I cannot, overtake my neighbor I mean! She is a teacher like me I am sure for as if reading my thoughts, the next song she plays is a favorite of mine and by the time it ends, I realize I had outdone myself - the heart rate monitor being the witness! You see the point I am trying to make is we never know where inspiration comes from. It applies to all of us. We should just keep looking for it even if we don’t know where, when or how. All we can do is just be open, allow it to sink in and lift us.

I turn the radio on as I leave for school. Finally, the jingles on the radio sound right, timing wise! I am ready to enjoy the season now. The flurries are coming down in a hurry. I look for them to land on the windshield as those perfect little flakes, only to disappear soon. But they have decided to come in chunks. I reach my classroom shivering only to find my students in a playful mood and the room chaotic than what I like. So I start off with a “Guys, it is so important to find some stillness….” only to be interrupted with a “Ms.S, the only time I can be still is….” by a handful of them at the same time! I realize it is that time of the year and like them, I am ready to spend time with my family cozily. So, I begin again with a “So with all that snow outside, how about we make some snowflakes today, you know the six-sided ones like the real ones?”. Before I know, I have the much-needed silence. As I play some music in the background, we start our day with papers and scissors! Bodily stillness has been achieved and I am sure with the gentle music, their little overactive minds will be still too!

It is perfect outside – cold, white and perfectly sunny. Our puppy who is playing outside has a bow on his collar for DD has decided he is the best present we have. As I watch the perfect stillness outside despite the recent chaos, something in me stirs. An article I am reading begins with a “Plant new roots regardless of the weather forecast" and ends with “To begin, begin!” I also read that we hold on to our new beginnings better when we start them ahead of the start of the New Year! A tad too early, but there’s no good time to begin than now - like that Purandara krithi “Indina dinave shubha dinavu!". We can always try to find that stillness in chaos.

 

Thank you Dear @Rihana , for your response! That indeed seems like a neat technique to use while writing those boring essays. Next time might try while writing a snippet here. Hope you are all getting ready to spend the break with family. A merry Christmas, Happy New Year and Happy Holidays to you and your loved ones.

PS: I hope you felt that smile while wishing you and your loved ones

 

Dear Syamala,

Thank you as always my friend for this warm response. While there are so many ups and downs, I do try my best to make the best of what's around me - it works sometimes but others, well then i go searching again

Thank you for your words! A very Happy New Year to you and your loved ones. Can you believe it is 2020! I sure can't. But 2020 has a nice ring to it, doesn't it?

 

Dear @Thyagarajan sir,

Trust you are well. Happy to get your feedback as always.

It indeed is. With kids growing up, I was trying to wiggle my way out of playing Santa but..... But you know what I found myself doing this time - busy buying small presents to friends who have young children and babies. That is so much fun. Some of my neighbors keep goodies to the folks of garbage collection company, mail man, news paper delivery guys etc. I am beginning to see the merit in it. Growing older and playing Santa...now I can see why Santa is an old man !!!!

Have a Happy New Year sir!!!

 

Dear V Sir,

Thank you for your words of appreciation.

I am ever grateful to be in the world of children, giving me many moments of stillness and joy! Have a Happy New Year....and loads of love to Orion