Siblings Rivalry

I am the only child and I am the first to post here:hide:


Well, like I said, I am the only child so I am 'THE QUEEN' of my home.;-)

But I grew up closely with my cousins, so there was competition with some of them. I was raised by my aunty away from my parents in another city. I would come home to my parents only during the holidays. Since I was not at home, my little cousin, my mom's brother's daughter would live with my parents and became very close to them. So when I come for holidays, she would not let me sleep in my parents room, let my mom tend to me, let my dad take me out and almost everyday we would fight for 'The Power'. My parents would go :crazy to calm us down. Finally my uncle came to know about this and took my cousin home during my vacations.
We had such silly rivalries while growing up among the children.

But I observed there was serious rivalries, jealousies among elders, some of my aunts and uncles. I being the only child got lot of attention, best school, best dresses, best life, so some of them would pass sarcastic comments and their children grew up to be them now. So some of my cousins have lot of -ve energy with them and they compare about the earnings, families, gifts, clothes etc etc. Now I keep away from such cousins and be friendly with the ones I am comfortable with.
Thanks to my parents/family who constantly put lot of positive attitude and confidence in me.

 

Hmm...interesting....
Well, when growing up i did not have rivalry with my own sister.I did have a lot of rivalorous feelings for my cousins, because they were closer to me in age and there was always this comparison between us from our parents and grandparents which i use to hate..so that was during the growing years...
in between generations, i have a rivalrous feeling for my MIL.She overshadows me in everything.She is the best cook, home maker and mom according to herself and DH..and she is so very confident about herself that i feel so small in front of her...

 

Oh my sibling rivalry. I am the 3rd born the age between my younger sis and i is 4yrs, between my eldest sis 8yrs and my elder brother 7yrs i was born after my borther so i used to get all the attention from both elder sister and brother as i came after many years then came my younger sis and she got all the attention even today she is still treated like a baby , but we both are treated like queens and she loves me so much that she will always think of me first then her we do things together, now the sibling rivalry is gone.
love
alpa:cheers

 

Iam the only daughter.I want to narrate this situation I closely witnessed in a friends family.

There are two sons.Younger son is given more importance among friends and relatives since he earns more,he is well settled in his professional life and he is a master in everything.Elder one is very closed,calm and he is brought up like a girl.(Soft spoken,shy etc).The sons are not being treated equally.PERIOD.

Now this younger son has some problems in his marital life.Elder son is in the situation to handle/provide some solutions to his brother's problems.He is not willing to provide and this younger son is not a position to take.He has no respect for his brother.

How will you classify this?

 

I classify it as Bad Parenting. Period.
Bad Parenting has led to this. Parents need to treat their kids equally - only then siblings can bond well.


PS:
There can be exceptions where there is sibling rivalry despite good parenting, but that's a different situation and usually not as hostile as the above case.

 

Well said,SP.

I told the same to them.They are not ready to accept.

During the childhood itself,it has started.Younger son used to get good snacks,good dress,good studies and so on.This is extremely bad.

I understand your P.S:thumbsup