1. How to Build Positivity in Married Life? : Click Here
    Dismiss Notice

Should one rely on male friends for emotional support

Discussion in 'Life Without Spouse' started by ansh12, Feb 6, 2008.

  1. ansh12

    ansh12 Bronze IL'ite

    Messages:
    436
    Likes Received:
    26
    Trophy Points:
    33
    Gender:
    Female
    Hi

    Human beings are social animals. We al like to be appriciated, loved and to be in good company. Of all relationships marriage can be most rewarding as well most punishing. When one goes through emotional turmoils, it very natural to find solace in friends. Its very natural to have male friends at place of work and at times they might be very supportive.

    How judicious is it to rely on male friends for emotional support?

    Please don't consider my statement as a biased one.World is full of both good and bad people(males as well females), the discussio or debate is whether it is advisable or not?

    thanks and best wishes

    Ansh12

    "what cannot be cured should be endured"
     
    Loading...

  2. rajmiarun

    rajmiarun Gold IL'ite

    Messages:
    1,134
    Likes Received:
    63
    Trophy Points:
    103
    Gender:
    Female
    Hi Ansh12,
    It is ok to get support, emotional support from male friends. No harms done, but those friends should be real good friends, who should never take advantage of your situation at any given time. Many a times even female friends let you down, but still it is our personal duty to choose our friends rather to blame them after all harm are done.
     
  3. ansh12

    ansh12 Bronze IL'ite

    Messages:
    436
    Likes Received:
    26
    Trophy Points:
    33
    Gender:
    Female
    Hi rajmiarun

    Thanks for reply. Well said, its our duty to choose our freinds, but at timesjudgement and choices do go wrong.

    Best wishes
    Ansh12
     
  4. Varloo

    Varloo Gold IL'ite

    Messages:
    4,022
    Likes Received:
    494
    Trophy Points:
    190
    Gender:
    Female
    Yes, it is very tricky to choose male friends whom we can rely on. It takes time and one's instinct helps.
    I have a very good friend who is a pillar of strength to me, I can share anything with him. My husband is aware and his wife is also aware. They both respect our friendship. This friendship is going on for the past 20 years.
     
  5. ansh12

    ansh12 Bronze IL'ite

    Messages:
    436
    Likes Received:
    26
    Trophy Points:
    33
    Gender:
    Female
    Hi Varloo

    Thanks for reply. Yes it is trickier when you are separated. Friendly with a married man at times makes his wife insecure. So, wife should also b e mature enough to respect the friendship.

    Regards
    Ansh12
     
  6. RamyaVaradharajan

    RamyaVaradharajan Bronze IL'ite

    Messages:
    950
    Likes Received:
    7
    Trophy Points:
    40
    Gender:
    Female
    Dear Ansh ma'am,

    "Emotional support" is much sort after by all creations since days pass by with its unique ups and downs. We ease out ourselves by conversing and sharing what we feel (or felt) on a particular occasion to our counterparts. Thus moral sharing aids in increasing our confidence exponentially to face circumstances and tackle hard situations with ease !!

    Thus emotional support can be sort from any gender if they are true to us and their own conscience. They only assist us in clearing our blues and it is ultimately "us" who is (should be) responsible and who has an upper hand in the "final decision". According to me, "our SELF is our first best friend cum enemy" !! Hope you get my lines. Listening to what our "inner" mind tells, will elevate us from hardships. But no decision can be finalized if the "conscience" is in a soup !!

    The "moral identity" of a person should be well known before we set to solve a problem with him/her. Meaning thereby, whether the person can take right decisions at the right time or not ; one who can act morally according to what the situation demands!! Reality should be well understood and the case should not be made flexible when it comes to analyzing a situation. Absolute truth should be felt as the outcome !!

    Regards
    RamyaVaradharajan

     
  7. ansh12

    ansh12 Bronze IL'ite

    Messages:
    436
    Likes Received:
    26
    Trophy Points:
    33
    Gender:
    Female
    Hi Ramya

    Well said!! You are right, one should try to see within, but in state of turmoil, its the friends that help you out and to understand a person, you need to spend time and at times, a person may be hypocrat just taking advanteg of one' fragile state of mind.

    I must compliment you for your good writing skill and good analysis of the problem.

    Wishing you a great career ahead and a great life too.

    Ansh12
     
  8. srisujji

    srisujji New IL'ite

    Messages:
    11
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    1
    Gender:
    Female
    The answer to this is 'yes' and 'no.
    When you are not vulnerable, and are a strong person, it is ok to seek emotional support from a male person.
    Most males take advantage 'given a chance'. Women should be very careful in this situation. You should be clear what you want , and then could share,( but not everything) take advice and help from male friends.
     
  9. RamyaVaradharajan

    RamyaVaradharajan Bronze IL'ite

    Messages:
    950
    Likes Received:
    7
    Trophy Points:
    40
    Gender:
    Female
    Dear Ansh ma'am,

    Thank you very much for your compliments and wishes. Sorry for the delay as was engaged in my project work and other tests.

    Ya very true. In a state of turmoil, we tend to lose our balance and go more emotional. Whenever I end up being emotional, I try to calm myself and deviate myself from the problem for a while. Even though we cannot deviate, literally speaking, but can free our mind from the knots that bother us. In the sub-conscious mind, the problem will be spinning on its axis and the solution will be thrown out very soon.

    Regards
    RamyaVaradharajan



     
  10. chinna24

    chinna24 New IL'ite

    Messages:
    35
    Likes Received:
    1
    Trophy Points:
    6
    Gender:
    Female
    Hi,

    There is nothing wrong on relying on male frdship,until u find him trustful.
    i do have a frd who is married,we both are very good frds i do not treat him as a male frd as i talk to him as i would talk to any of my female frds such as about cooking,or about any of my problem or we talk abt our family so it could be anything.so it all depends on what kind of frd u choose.
     

Share This Page