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Should in-laws sit in front seat or backseat of car?

Discussion in 'Relationship With In-Laws' started by Rihana, Jun 29, 2011.

  1. Anamika99

    Anamika99 Gold IL'ite

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    I have the same situation..but then when we visit india, MIL happily occupies front passenger seat without thinking about dad-son time during short visit...double standards!!
     
  2. justanothergirl

    justanothergirl IL Hall of Fame

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    Your inlaws are visiting u . Its a matter of few months and few trips.If this is the only issue then I would say let it go.How does it matter who sits next to whom in a mini-van as long as u are all travelling together?Dont make it a big deal and spoil the mood of the trip. No matter where u sit in the van he is ur husband. Let ur FIL enjoy sitting with his son. For most parents its a matter of pride to see their children do so well and drive exp cars. Indulge them.

    If on the other hand u have motion sickness and the back seat aggravates ur condition like in the case of my MIL please speak up and I would think most reasonable PIL will take it in the right spirit.

    If it still bothers u so much I have a simple solution..next time u go on a trip..u drive.
    Automatically ur DH will sit next to u.
    No one will get hurt.
     
    6 people like this.
  3. Vennella

    Vennella Gold IL'ite

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    Interesting thread! I didn't know the front seat is so coveted. In fact, irrespective of my relation with the driver, I sit in the front seat, just for the leg room, and also for non-contact of other passengers. Also, seat belt helps with motion sickness. :)

    Maybe, for short visits, we can give the preferred seat to the oldest person in the passenger gang. If your FIL is oldest, he gets it. If there is an elder BIL, you can offer him the seat. If there is a younger BIL, you kick him to the back seat :)

    Somehow, discriminating on the basis of age makes me feel a little better than gender. You can pass it off as "respect"! though I wonder how the front seat can impart any more importance to the person who is sitting in it. it's not like the chief minister's seat!
     
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  4. angel1719

    angel1719 Silver IL'ite

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    Hey there...
    This is quite interesting thread I must say....see it depends on every individual..but I will tell that parents do notice all these small gestures..when my parents were here for visit...and my bro used to drive...My SIL never let go off her front seat...My dad never sat in front seat even once...during their visit even her dad was with my parents..so obviously he wont sit with my SIL and my mom...So my dad, her dad and mom in back row..and me in 3rd row...and my SIL in front always...even after her dad left in few days...she used to sit in front seat...and my dad, mom and me in back row...
    To which my dad told mom once that I was here for visit (one month) and never got a chance to sit in front seat...
    So when I used to take my car...sometimes mom used to sit in front or dad...but it was only 3 of us then....
    But yes my mom dad both felt that my SIL never gave up the front seat....

    And when I was in India..if I am going with FIL and MIL...it was FIL always in front row and my MIL and me in 2nd row...i never even thought of sitting in front seat..as I was newly married and was there only for 10days...
    But I don't mind giving up front row..as I feel if there is other female in the car..I can chat with her and let males discuss their own topics....Like if we have another couple in our car (friends goin for movie) I let the male sit in front so we girls can talk...
    So it shouldn't be a big issue to give the seat for short period....as far as you are with your DH in same minivan..and they are not leaving you at home and going...
     
  5. nature123

    nature123 New IL'ite

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    Sorry to say there is no tact required in this other than just speaking up like one of the previous poster said.

    But, I want to say this to you...........C'MON Yaar! After all, you will be sitting there through out your life. Right? Why bother on this? Anyway, they will be here for short time. And, sitting in the front seat your H can also chat with them easily without turning his head always to respond. When they meet once in a while or after long time they will have lots to catch up with so why not offer them that seat???...............JMO!!!
     
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  6. kma

    kma Gold IL'ite

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    In our case, after marriage my MIL voluntarily gave up that seat for me and wanted me sit beside hubby. Likewise in my BIL's house , its his wife who always sits beside him even when we visit. My hubby and myself used to sit behind. But these are not always compulsary, sometimes according to the necessity and convenience ,this arrangament would change too. Maybe because they never tried to take away my right :) , I am not too fussy abt this . On the other hand, my father does not like to sit behind. He always sits in the front to avoid leg cramping etc. So my SIL bechari always sits in the back. Incase a driver is there, she sits there with my bro, which is most often the case when they visit.
     
  7. lotusgirl

    lotusgirl Senior IL'ite

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    this gave a nice chuckle..i thought it was only when we were kids we fought for the Window seat or the front seat..
    Why just the question when inlaws come? what about ones own parents? and whats the big deal about front seat for a few days if that gives happiness to some other person however silly it might sound?

    Even with friends we tend to do the same.. esp since i have my LO at the back.. i sit there so that LO has my company and not some other uncle/aunt.. if there is more than 1 guy in the group, the first one there or incase of elders, they get the front seat and the other guy sits with me &whoever else is there at the back..

    there have been instances where i have asked the accompanying lady friend to sit in front and me take the back seat with LO..
    When it comes to FIL or Father/Mum or MIL/elder Aunt etc , if it gives them a bit of pride/happiness to sit in front, why not?? i think this stem from the FACT that Cars were coveted luxury item back in the days & hence the pride associated with the front seat...

    but then i do think it might get a bit stifling if this is the default norm if you are living with parents/ils full time..
     
  8. monita

    monita Platinum IL'ite

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    My ILs stay with us was always so mind numbing that I couldn't care less if I sat in front or back. My ILs had their seating priority always. At the dining table, my FIL always had to sit at the head of the table. If my DS sat there, they would ask him to get up. In the car, of course his right to sit in front was unquestionable.He slept all the time sitting on front seat. I have always been the navigator for my DH. If he asked me the way, I couldn't tell him as it was difficult to see from the back seat.
    I think, eventually DH got fed up of the set up and asked his father to sit in the back seat.
    For people wondering, what's the big deal. Well, It isn't. It's just that we are used to sitting next to DH in the front seat.
     
  9. parvathi1980

    parvathi1980 Platinum IL'ite

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    my in laws came here and my fil sat in the front seat. it was a natural thing for me that he nd hubby shud be in front! ofcourse now my in laws will never come here again since my mil has totally lost it!

    a childhood friend nd his wife came to visit us and he sat in front with my hubby. i sat with my son nd his wife in the back seat. frankly i did not have any prob with that!
     
  10. vjbunny

    vjbunny IL Hall of Fame

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    Hi,
    I dont bother who sits in the front seat of minivan....as I always sit next to myDH in Lifevan.....
     
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