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Should I stop speaking mother tounge at home?

Discussion in 'Toddlers' started by anika987, May 22, 2015.

  1. anika987

    anika987 IL Hall of Fame

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    My DD is two and half yrs and recently started going to day care.
    I basically enquirer about her and the teacher said that she likes to play independently, for circle time sits and listens for two minutes and then walks off..comes again and does the same.we speak tamil at home and a little bit of English.teacher told that she is not sure of she understands instructions.

    About my kid..

    she was very quiet and on her own until two.we went to India for few months,put her in a preschool there.the kids in INdia are super smart and talk a storm.they also listen to instructions.my kid was hyper,does not listen much and. We were bluntly told there is a problem with my kid.


    coming back to US,the ped said my child seems fine and will confirm by two and half.
    i have an appt net week.

    my observation about my child..

    1)she makes good eye contact
    2) Listens to instructions and throws trash in the garbage,eats on the table and puts plate in the sink
    3) eats with a spoon
    4)likes books
    5) is fine around other kids and elders
    6) smiles a lot and sometimes teases me
    7)understands what is what,knows what toy is what
    8) walks quietly to the daycare without a fuss and comes back to the car
    9)likes numbers,alphabets and rhymes
    10) responds to name


    negatives if any:
    little adamant,tantrums which she had around two has reduced drastically,occasionally little tantrums,speaks words but not sentences and words are not clear like other kids..just very babyish.

    Anyways coming back to topic..almost two and half and does not speak English .should I be worried?

    I can check with the pediatrician next week...but just need opinions from other mothers...just to feel..maybe better..u can give your opinions..
     
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  2. justanothergirl

    justanothergirl IL Hall of Fame

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    Does she talk tamil at home with u..atleast simple words like amma appa va po etc?
     
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  3. anika987

    anika987 IL Hall of Fame

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    She says words..

    like appa,mama,that ya,paati but does not use much.
    she knows who is amma and appa..
    answers only when asked.

    if I ask her to knock the door..she will be like" knock the door" and knock.
    does things only when asked.

    she is quiet and talks only when we talk.does not come and sit and communicate
     
  4. Chitravivek

    Chitravivek Platinum IL'ite

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    She talks words, She listens, comprehends and understands, I am not sure why you're worried. She seems on reserved type and all kids are at that age. She is still a baby, just 2.5yrs old. I would not stop speaking in Tamil. Kids can grab a lot at this age. I am sure she will pick up English pretty soon. Does she listen to what teacher says like- Go pick the toy, sit down, its nap time etc....?

    I can totally relate you to one of my friend. Her son is 2.5yrs too and exactly like your daughter. She says he speaks telugu and hindi to her but believe me we have never seen her son talk. Seems her teacher raised the same concern as yours but she is not worried as to her he speaks and that he will pick up English soon.

    I went to the school one day and accidently met him in the class( My DD is in same school and son will go too). I was shocked, he was saying numbers and listening all that the teacher said. He is still reserved but nothing alarming. Its just his nature. They all come out of it soon.
     
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  5. peartree

    peartree Platinum IL'ite

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    @anika987, I am not going to give you any suggestion on the behavior aspect, I think your pediatrician is the best person to discuss that.

    I think the point about understanding instructions in English, I feel it has to do more with the fact that it is only recently that she is exposed to a social circle of people her own age and not so much with difficulty in understanding instructions. I am saying this because I have observed a similar behavior with my niece. She was with a nanny and then the only child at a home daycare (in addition to 2 kids of the daycare provider herself). So the first time she went to pre-school, she would do her own thing, while being curious about what everyone else was doing from time to time. It took her sometime to be drawn out. Like you, she was used to Tamil at home, Hindi with her nanny/first day care and then English.

    I think the important thing here is to speak with your child as much as possible, even if you think she is just playing by herself... you should still keep talking to her. My DD and niece were used to the constant chattering from my mom when they were kids and I think that made a huge difference in them being able to grasp speech very effectively. When grandma was not around, if I was doing stuff in the kitchen, I would plop her near the counter and keep talking to my DD, like if I was putting mustard in teh kadai, I would say "kadugu... nee sollu" and "idhu manja podi" "idhu molaga podi".. whatever. Also, I think it is a good thing she seems to be interested in books, read out aloud to her. I am sure it will tremendously help.

    From what you have said, I just think your little one is just fine, with a strong, clear mind of her own... like she has it all figured out now :)
     
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  6. justanothergirl

    justanothergirl IL Hall of Fame

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    Am no expert..but I dont think there is any reason to worry. She seems to be doing fine. Children can learn to speak many languages all at the same time . My own at one point could speak 3 and switch between them effortlessly. Ofcourse all that changes once they start school and then its just english :bonk. Dont stop talking ur mother tongue at home....even if they dont talk back to u.
     
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  7. anika987

    anika987 IL Hall of Fame

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    Thank you all:) was little affected and moody today..hope she will come out of it soon..
     
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  8. Thoughtful

    Thoughtful Gold IL'ite

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    Sister,
    Its difficult to tell if your DD has problems. She also too young for anyone to make conclusions. Don't let this bother you.

    However, make a list of things which you think are bothering you. Find activities for your child to cross over.

    If she doesn't mingle with other kids, befriend parents of other children at her day care and have play dates.

    No need to stop speaking in mother tongue. Find someone else to talk in another language. Speech therapy is beneficial if she is unable to pronounce certain words and to learn english.

    Read stories to her everyday. You can also introduce limited TV time to increase language skills.

    Your child might cross all barriers in no time.
     
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  9. TDR

    TDR Bronze IL'ite

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    my DD was exactly like yours when she was 2. we put her to prekg @ 2.5 years. that time she hardly spoke any and no understanding of english. now she is 3.5 , talks a lot mingles a lot and very active. she even talks to elders very well in english and kannada (local language here) .

    i would suggest you one thing, talk to her in english after scool. but dont stop talking in tamil. i did it after the initial feedback from school, my DD avoided talking altogether. so use both languages . say it in english, explain in tamil. I feel she is very much normal. be patient and give her little more time
     
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  10. ammani

    ammani Gold IL'ite

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    When our son was 2 we put him to playgroup.. He spoke only konkani.. He didn't cry, was shy to mingle.. Then he joined nursery.. By two months he learnt hindi and he is grammatically correct in his Hindi now.. We speak mother tongue at home.. And will continue as he shudnt miss to learn that.. He is learning English words as well.. I tell meaning of English words in mother tongue so he is okay.. He is now 3.6 year old!!

    Angry young man we have.. He has his tantrums too.. We used scold and try to correct he used scream cry and more tantrums.. Now we ignore.. He stops and comes and hugs us and forget sometimes!!
     

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