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Should I Have Done Something Differently?

Discussion in 'Toddlers' started by cooks2010, Apr 21, 2016.

  1. cooks2010

    cooks2010 Silver IL'ite

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    Hi, this happened to me a few weeks ago and was wondering whether I should have handled it differently. I have a 28 month year old (just over 2yrs) girl and we recently visited my sis in law for a night.

    She is very attached to our daughter and is soon expecting her first baby. She was playing in her room and opened up a drawer, took out her make up case and asking what is this and that......which is fine. Next thing I know, our kid says I want to try this and my sis in law starts to apply make up on her (eyeshadow, blush, lipstick).

    She also applied nailpolish to her hands and feet. In the past, when my daughter has asked, I have said when your older I will apply some for you, your young right now.

    My husband and I just looked at each other horrified...we couldnt say anything and let it go...because we were just there for a day. I think I am feeling guilty, that I didnt say no and I didnt stand up for my daughter about whats right or wrong.

    We are also feeling bad, that the sis in law didnt ask us first, whether its ok to apply make up or not in the first place. Am I expecting too much, should she have asked? or is it ok? Should we let it go.

    How should I handle these situations if they happen again. I dont want to seem like a controlling mom with these agendas and rules. We also let go of the chocolate / biscuit/ ice cream rule too when we are there. At our place we dont keep any of that.

    Should I have handled the situation differently?
    Cooks.
     
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  2. sanjuruby3

    sanjuruby3 Platinum IL'ite

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    Well, definitely she is wrong. But since she is pregnant herself, I would say swallow it this time and not spoil relations. Once her own kid comes, she will understand. Definitely if it happens again and again, you need to stop.

    When I go to India, same things happen. First time i used to get all fired up and watching/stopping everyone. Now I have stopped worrying much. Also it makes our near dear ones who love my Lo immensely feel bad.

    Last time, she was 1 and people were giving her soda, chocolates. She could not eat/bite in hard stuff, but kids will put super hot/spicy basan snacks in her mouth secretly, inspite of me telling no. I saw a kid was sneaking first seeing i am not around/watching, she was expecting LO to swallow immediately before I see.

    Now, someone was doing something similar makeup related but since that was my younger blood sis, I stopped her and she did not mind at all.
     
  3. KashmirFlower

    KashmirFlower IL Hall of Fame

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    as it is one time, i think it is ok, but next time when your kid asks you, aunt applied why u say no, then u have to be ready with answer what to say to ur kid. :blush:. Need lot of tactics for parents.
     
  4. guesshoo

    guesshoo IL Hall of Fame

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    It's done. So please don't stress about it anymore.

    I have always stopped people from applying makeup / nail polish on my child. Firmly but politely. She has had talcum powderdabbed on her face once before I noticed it - I explained to her that it wasn't good for her skin and washed it off. Yes. Parents who protest are looked at weirdly by some. However it really is up to us to ensure things remain consistent for our child. By the time she was 3.5 she knew enough to say, "no! I am not allowed nail polish on my fingernails. I could end up swallowing some."
     

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