Should I Go Ahead.

aha. the age old insecurity of either men or women.

just a suggestion. accept any challenge. but make sure it is in your terms like that challenge has to be in an organized manner. means if you are competing against another player ( married and opposite sex ) , it must be in a more official way like a your society competition. and the audience is bit far where you do not have to deal with their personal comments.

 

There are two things.

1) Chess competition: A chess competition between any players (male or female or married or kid doesn't matter) should be taken sportively. Since you are a married woman, I am sure you have the fullest support of your spouse about this match, and he and your family is aware of the same. I also expect the same from the opponent's side if at all he cares about them. If not, it is his business because as a player you don't have to bother much about the personal issues of your opponent.
Now focus on the match. Try to win him or lose better and learn from the loss. Take this match as a sport and nothing more.
Learn to accept public criticism from good and bad critics. It happens the moment you play before others. Weigh the good and bad and move on.

2) Your alleged crush: Sorry, but reading your post it feels like you have developed a silent crush on this man, who happens to be your neighbour and a great chess player. It happens, especially when you meet someone who shares the same interest as you. Especially when that person started seeing your talent, and happens to be opposite gender.
Perhaps, he too feels the same about you and would love to spend more quality (chess) time with you.
Today his wife feels insecure about this, and soon it will also reflect in your H's mood.
If you accept open competition with other chess players within your neighbourhood or at office or at any public place, I think this one would not stand alone in the eyes of others. If not, and if you also feel there are some insecurities in others, better drop this.
The next time, say no.. and give some excuses. Soon, both of you will get over this and move on.

This is absolutely normal, though you may not want to recognize this.

 

Dear Paru, if you pardon me for expressing my opinion, I would say that it doesn't matter what his wife feels, or for that matter what the nosey parkers in your society think, but it only matters what you and your loved ones think. Take for example, your hubby! What does this guy think? Is he comfotable with this, or does he feel a tad jealous (because he cannot play chess)? If he thinks so, you have every reason to detract.

And what about you? Do you suffer from scruples, do you feel a thorn in your heart that is constantly pricking when you spend time with him? If that be the case, you should stop.

In my opinion, playing chess with a person of opposite sex, who is married by the way, is no sin for a married person.

 

Dear Paru, I appreciate you for taking a bold decision. I would like to reveal that both you and I share the same passion: playing chess. I have been playing chess since I was just a slip of a boy. My dad was very fond of this game. He was an SDO at that time, and he had a few cronies who used to visit every evening, much to the disgust of my mother, and play chess along with getting a nice collation. I sat there watching them, and eventually started loving the game.

Now as far as your case is concerned, I think you need a bit of practice to hone your skills. You can download a few chess apps from Google Playstore. I have myself done it, as I haven't had the pleasure of playing chess with anybody, forget about playing with females, in recent years. This apps are very good, and if you switch on the learning mode, you can learn a lot.

 

Thank you OP. This reminds me of "If tomorrow comes" by Sydney Sheldon where the protagonist -a lady- in a sailing ship gets that she would draw the game playing simultaneously with world champions.
This is part of the plot of Sidney Sheldon's If Tomorrow Comes. A woman on a cruise ship with two chess grandmasters bets a large amount of money that she can draw a game with each of them. Of course she plays them at the same time, one game with white, the other black.

It's hilariously improbable to chess players, but some of my non-playing friends thought it was clever.

I was near champion in my school and college but never gone beyond that as i had to concentrate on other pressing matters. I did play chess with others including boys and girls and even adults during my academics.
But to play now with another married women in front of or even stealthily I shudder because I do not want unnecessary issues .
"They" may think familiarity breeds "attempt". I for one as a married man at my age would avoid playing chess or any other game indoor or outdoor with married or unmarried women or spinsters.
Among couples of western society, it may not be an issue. The minds are broad and people are least bothered about others mixed play!
For memory, I do use method of association. For example to remember 64, I immediately think of chess board of 8 x 8 squares. This transports my mind to a story in link :
Chess With My Pin