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Should I Divorce My Husband?

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by nisha86, Nov 10, 2020.

  1. Minion

    Minion Platinum IL'ite

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    The same logic can be applied to everything in life, if you step out of your house there is no guarantee that you will return back safe to your home, does that mean you don’t do anything and sit in your home the day you where born ? Stop using these type of logic to justify abuse, what’s next bring back sati ?
     
  2. netflx

    netflx Gold IL'ite

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    It would help if you can make your statement without being rude. Somehow does not seem right to be so rude to an elder person here. You can ofcourse state your point of view, just felt it can be done without being rude, thats all.
     
  3. nakshatra1

    nakshatra1 Platinum IL'ite

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    No, I understood correctly what u wrote.That's why I wrote boyfriend and not husband.
    How can u think it is normal to discuss alliances with your boyfriend- didn't u two have feelings for each other?Weren't u in love? Then how can u both talk like this so casually ?

    And you are saying you married him simply because you "too thought what he said was correct and just followed whatever he said. " What were u expecting, he will evaluate objectively and recommend the right guy to you?! So you went against your parents and married without their knowledge, not because you had FEELINGS for him but because he said you he was the right guy among all the proposals?!


    I know u are talking about what happened 10 years back. But the way u talk of it shows you are still immature. Really, I feel u need to introspect properly before jumping into another 2nd marriage. About first marriage- if he is already searching how to escape alimony- then this marriage is over.
    But before u go for second marriage, u also need to change, this time u need to do things as per your own choice/feelings/own decision rather because someone/parents/relatives told. You need to think deeply what you want from life and do that - stop following whatever direction other people give you !
     
    Last edited: Nov 16, 2020
  4. Thyagarajan

    Thyagarajan IL Hall of Fame

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    OK OK. Cool. I know .... it is illogical not to try but to continue for eternity ... when youth is evaporated when spirit is high flesh is weak ..... I agree
    “A hungry stomach, an empty pocket and a broken heart can teach the best lessons of life”. I agree Few things in life should be done illogically. Now I understood. Thank you from bottom of my heart.

    Thanks @netflx .


    A man tried repeatedly umpteen times over few decades. Successive Failures did not deter him. He turned President when he was fifty plus.
    A space mission met with colossal accident and few more in greater disasters.

    Despite passing time & age, One continue to attempt to reach Moon and
    Mars & beyond with improved stringent specification for materials.

    Yes one must persevere newer bold improved beautiful methods irrespective of Geography, altitude and attitude.
     
  5. lavani

    lavani Platinum IL'ite

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    I agree with netfx, basically these forums are brainstorming to help the OP.

    Everyone is sharing their life experiences, quoting any IL because their idea is inferior is not going to help. just because a idea does not agree with your principles in life, does not mean to start a new discussion on what to speak or how to speak .

    It is up to the OP to take these ideas or reject.
     
  6. DavenaRosalie

    DavenaRosalie Silver IL'ite

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    You should do whatever will make you happy, if you feel that you are not happy with your marriage any more then divorce him. But before doing your next step, think hard and weigh the pros and cons of your action.
     
  7. Minion

    Minion Platinum IL'ite

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    If the Indians thought that nothing can be done about the British rule in India; India will still be ruled by the British every change comes with a struggle just look at the history.

    Advising a women that there is no life after divorce is not an advice, its male chauvinism.

    Male chauvinism

    Male chauvinism is the belief that men are superior to women.
     
    Last edited: Nov 17, 2020
  8. Hopikrishnan

    Hopikrishnan Platinum IL'ite

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    Looks to me that Thyagarajan made a gender-neutral statement about being single.
     
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  9. nakshatra1

    nakshatra1 Platinum IL'ite

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    @Minion
    @Thyagarajan ji has simply shared his views and what he considers good advice for OP's benefit, and with best intentions . Nowhere has he given any patriarchal views.

    We are here to give honest advice OP as she is facing a serious dilemna - rather than just to speak whatever sounds nice , and that is what he has done.

    We should do the same rather than judging others for their advice , outright.
     
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  10. Minion

    Minion Platinum IL'ite

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    When OP is a woman you don’t have to specifically spell out the gender.
     

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