Sharing marital problems with opposite gender friends

Ri
What it essentially boils down to is this
"is a healthy platonic friendship possible between members of opp sex where u can share everything including ur marital woes after marriage".
While theoretically its possible.... I wouldnt like it if my DH were to confide in another woman if he had issues with our marriage. Would I like it if he talked it over with another guy. I might not be thrilled he talked to anyone in the first place ..but since I am the problem I will be more tolerant of the latter.

 

Personally I wouldn't be comfortable sharing marital problems with opposite sex.I came close to it once,the guy was younger I considered him like a brother-but it didn't feel right and I stopped myself.If my husband were to do that,I would definitely be hurt,so the same rule applies to me too.
Having said that Rihanna,I feel its ok if he/she is common friend to both spouses & agrees to be a mediator to resolve issues.My dad had a female collegue who had serious marital issues.We are family friends & my dad is pretty close to her H,so he ended up being the mediator & now things are back to normal between them.If the third party involved has the best intentions for the couple to remain happy,then its nothing wrong.

 

completely true and agree with littl.. One's lenience is advantage to others. And the formula will drive to their favor basis on the age, need, situation..

 

I agree with Riya on this. It will never be a problem if you are really talking to a correct person. If the person is not , irrespective of gender there will be a problem defintely.

 

I have few Male friends who got married much before. After the marriage they used to share their problems with me.
We were all close friends (We are all at different places now and hardly have time to talk) then and I did not feel bad.
I tried to remain neutral while giving any suggestions if any.


After my marriage, I discuss my issues with my male friends whom I know for more than a decade. Infact they had given me very good suggestions
and also told me on how mens brain work at different situations. All the time I just narrated the situations to them and never blamed my DH infront of them.
Ofcourse I dont talk all these on daily basis and it happens only when I meet them in person.
At the same time I discuss some general problems which even they might have faced in their married life.
Strictly no to absolutely private and intimate matters.

 

i will feel more secure and comfortable in sharing marital problem with same gender. i wont ever tell another man about my marital problem. do u know guys gossip too? i cant face the consequences if the guy tells another guy about me having marital problems.

 

do you seriously think every mens brain can be explained by another men? :crazy

women - man -> its not good for men either.
and discussing with same gender, either men - men / women - women is normal.
looks like your derivation derives one should not share marital problems with anyone except to a doctor doh1

IMO - instead of approaching opposite gender, women can share problems with elder women like their MIL, Mother or some times with a close friends like childhood friends etc .. whoever approachable and favorable to them. so one must understand that women have many options to think of before they share their problems with opposite gender.
but for men.? (if they really wanna share) they can share with men only.
the person may be a doctor or a close understanding friend but can not be a brother, mother, MIL, sissy or any...!

 

i will feel more secure and comfortable in sharing marital problem with same gender. i wont ever tell another man about my marital problem. do u know guys gossip too? i cant face the consequences if the guy tells another guy about me having marital problems.

 

good for you. and yes some men gossip ... :biggrin2:
and am curious to ask .. why did you posted the same post again ? :crazy

 

here male friends doesn't bring in their topic about spouses or inlaws telling your inlaws are much better than mine, I turn really furious 'when they what you are going through is nothing when compared to my problem'.. it wouldn't be the same with guys I guess.
as someone said in earlier posts venting out in IL is best choice but here to people come and irk us saying 'is this a problem, please go and look for other ilites how badly they are suffering'?