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Share Of Children In Parents Property/investments

Discussion in 'Parents & Siblings' started by leenarajaryan, Jul 28, 2016.

  1. leenarajaryan

    leenarajaryan Silver IL'ite

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    Hello :hello::hello: requesting some suggestions from my IL friends.
    I am self dependent, though not much qualified (graduate) I am earning a good amount in which I can manage my home & other requirements. I have a younger sis she has done her Diploma in ECE.
    I could manage to get a job & continue it to support my family but she left it for her kids. I got support to raise my son from my mom & MIL both as I was staying nearby. I bought a small flat b4 my marriage & other bigger one after marriage. 1st was bought with a small help of my parents as that time I was not married & rest on loan. Further I cleared it off before buying the 2nd. My husband had some job issues & could not contribute in the 2nd home too. I managed it single handed.

    Now the issue is though being qualified my sis is not working nor have any assets of her own. Her Hubby has bought it but my parents say that like you she don't have any property on her name alone. So they have transferred the house they live in her name. Now it is like she owns the property & our parents are staying in her house. They said that whatever other investments, cash n gold they have can be mine after them, which is not even half of the cost of the property. Besides this whenever need comes she keeps borrowing help from my dad on non returnable basis.

    When I asked about this to my parents they say she is younger & not earning but you are so you should not feel jealous of that. I am not jealous but I feel she is wasting her education seating home:disappointed:.

    Also when I had completed my 10th I wanted to join Hotel management I had expressed that to my parents but they had refused then as that time we were not that financially sound & asked me to join graduation stating finance issues. But when it came to my Sis's time my father tried hell to get her admitted to the best option she had wished. If I could have got the opportunity of Hotel management my life could have been different than that it is today. Nothing went wrong but in a corner I feel they had been partial to me. May be they feel it too, so whenever I have any issues now they are always ready to help me out. I don't need any help but also don't want them to be bias. After all what I am/have today is coz of them only. I love them n my sis too. This is just a feeling I wished to share.

    Have a nice day IL Ladies....:cheer::cheer::cheer::cheer:
     
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  2. leenarajaryan

    leenarajaryan Silver IL'ite

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    So many views n no comments.. :crybaby2:
     
  3. VaniVyas

    VaniVyas Platinum IL'ite

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    Dont worry dear... If you think you are right, God will bless you for your sacrifices and support.( u r showing ur parent)..
    Dont develop much thoughts as it may create difference with ur sister.
     
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  4. GuideMe

    GuideMe Senior IL'ite

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    Dear OP, I know exactly how you feel. My situation is somewhat similar, although it is not about property. In fact, in my humble opinion, property is more like a symptom of the problem. The underlying issue is the lack of emotional support and acceptance. They do not value you. My advice would be to sort out your feelings. Remove the chaff from the wheat and systematically work on your emotions, (unmet) expectations and disappointments.

    Sorry, I am not of much help to you because I am myself caught in this whirlwind of emotions, I am trying to sort. I just did my venting and saw your thread.

    here it goes, if you are interested.

    Venting

    P.S. Btw, congratulations on your achievements. You made lemonade when life handed you lemons. That speaks a lot about your character. Well done :)
     
    Last edited: Aug 8, 2016
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  5. sweetsmiley

    sweetsmiley Platinum IL'ite

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    Hi OP,

    I guess you can talk about your feelings to your parents and ask directly about this. Ask the reason why didn't they inform about property transfer before itself. You can tell them that you really worked hard to clear off the loan and didn't enjoy the luxury of spending time with kids like your sis.If your parents talk about jealousy, say them its not jealousy and you feel really bad about the partiality from parents side. Tell them that you did sacrificed your dream study as elder one and fulfilled all your duties.

    But there is a high chance that it will create a big misunderstanding between you and your parents. Do you want to go through all that? if you think its not worth to go through all that, just hint your mom alone about your pain.

    god will compensate all your hard work in a different way. dont worry
     
    leenarajaryan likes this.
  6. leenarajaryan

    leenarajaryan Silver IL'ite

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    Thanks @guide & @sweetsmiley .... I do have a feeling of being left out at some level but besides that I value & love my parents a lot. I have already told them that I did not like what they did but I am okay with there decision as this was there hard earn money & they had the right to distribute as per there wish.
    I also love my sis & I guarantee I would never ever spoil my relation with her for this reason.
    Being elder daughter & no brother I feel that my parents are my responsibility & I am proud of myself that I have been doing it nicely..

    Thanks friends.
     
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