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Shahid Kapoor's 3 Moms and Dads, Malaya,Mangoes

Discussion in 'Snippets of Life (Non-Fiction)' started by Kamalji, Jun 30, 2015.

  1. Kamalji

    Kamalji IL Hall of Fame

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    Shahid Kapoor's 3 Moms and Dads, Malaya,Mangoes



    Vijay Mallya's Private Jet Sold For Scrap To Recover Kingfisher Airlines Dues


    Vijay Mallaya's private personal jet has been sold as scrap, by his lenders, for Rs. 22 lakhs, to recover a part of their money lent to KingFisher.

    First his cars were taken away, now his private jet which he used to fly himself. i think this is the same jet he flew to South Africa , taking along friends, to watch the IPL 2 in 2009.

    The toilet seat in his plane toilet, where he sat, once, must be auctioned seperately. i am sure there must be many buyers eager to sit on that seat, where the king once sat. What a fall !!


    =======================================================================================================================



    Shahid Kapoor is getting married. But then so what ? Most people his age, now have school going kids, and are not playboys in their mid thirties.But then he has inherited it from his dad, pankaj Kapoor, who has married twice, his first mother Neelima, who has married twice again.


    Meet Shahid Kapoor's 3 Fathers And 3 Mothers


    So it seems 3 fathers and 3 mothers of Shahid are coming to attend his marriage.His actual mother, , she married twice, so two step fathers were born, and then the guy who married his mom, divorced her and married again, so another mother is born, and so on.As he is a famous star, so everyone wants to be his mother or father !!


    Also kids from each marriage, so many step brothers and sisters , and i dont think they need any outsiders to fill in the wedding hall, they have enough in the family eh ! And Shahid and his Dad , follow the same guru as my wife, and are vegetarians, but that does not stop them from these nonvegetarian activities eh !


    =================================================================================================================

    Juicy mangoes add bitterness to Jitan Ram Manjhi - Nitish Kumar feud - The Economic Times


    Bihar - Chief Minister Manjhi has refused to vacate the cheif Minister's Bunglow , in spite of being unseated by Nitesh Kumar. Andit seems the Bunglow has trees of Leechi and Mangoes.


    It seems 8 sub inspectors and 16 policement have been deployed, do u know for what ? So that Manjhi or any other staff of the Bunglow, does not steal any mangoes, or Leechis from the trees !!!


    Not even the ones that have fallen on the floor .


    Manjhi is furious, but Kamalji is smiling. First policemen sent to search for the Missing Buffaloes of Azam Khan, and now policement to protect the mangoes by being stolen by the Chief Minister.

    HAHA.



    ===================================================================================================================

    5-year-old girl’s condition stable - The Times of India


    The 5 year old girl who fell down the borewell, and was inside it for more than a day, was saved, thanks to the army and other personel, who risked their lvies to save the little girl. Thank God she is safe and well.



    The girls father had dug a borewell, but finding no water, did not bother to fill it up, or close it properly, and he left a boulder on top, and left it at that. Well He paid the price and his own daughter fell in it.


    The father must be flogged in public, and it be made known that when a tubewell is unsuccessful, it must be closed proplery and not be abandoned like this. If not his, someone else's child could fall in it.And he must be made to pay the costs incurred on rescuing his child. the Government is not responsible to pay for our individual misdeeds and mistakes. The father is to be condemned in no uncertain manner.



    ===================================================================================================================


    The guy in Jeans,
    Spilling the Beans,

    Abroad, having a Ball,
    Troubling with his reveltation, All,

    He has a lot of wealth,
    But i fear for his Health .

    He had made many a Nanga,
    Not good to take with so many, panga !!!!!


    Amen.


    KAMAL MAHTANI


    ==================================================================================================================




    Pankaja Munde, Smriti Irani, Sushma, Vasundhara, Mamta, Sonia......

    Ek baat to fix ho gayi hai- Modiji ki kundli mein aurat se sukh nahi hai....I


    =================================================================================================================

    Marriage is quite like beer

    1. Looks inviting
    2. Kick doesn't last long
    3. You're never satisfied with one
    4. Eventually gives you a pot belly....

    =================================================================================================================
    A survey found that 62% people want to party 7 times a week

    Figure drastically dropped to 17% when words 'with wife' were added

    & it dropped to 0.17% when words 'own wife' were added

    =================================================================================================================


    Customer to Santa : Teri to rasgulle ki Dukaan hai, tera khaane Ka man nahi karta....

    Santa : Karta to hai uncle Lekin papa count kar Ke rakhte hain....isliye bas choos Ke wapas rakh deta hoon.

    The Customer Fainted!!

    ==============================================================================================================


    Man to very beautiful airhostess:- "What's your name?"

    Air hostess:- "Eva Benz.."

    Man :- "Lovely name...any relation to Mercedes Benz?"

    Air hostess:- (smiling) "maintenance cost is same"

    =============================================================================================================
    A Lady was conducting her anti drinking campaign outside a bar.
    A man came out of the Bar exuding alcohol fumes and the Lady said,

    "Reflect! If you arrive at the Gates of Heaven with your breath smelling of liquor, do you think the Lord will let you in?"

    "My good woman," said the man,

    "when I go to Heaven I expect to leave my breath behind".


    ==========================================================================================================
    Gujju friend calls his friend Girish-

    hey Girish I'm sorry about your being bankrupt.

    Girish- abey woh Greece hai!
     
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  2. satchitananda

    satchitananda Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    Kamalji, could not help feel sorry for Shahid Kapur's ILs who will probably end up paying the bill for the very extended family!
     
  3. Akanksha1982

    Akanksha1982 IL Hall of Fame

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    Nice one kamalji.

    If Shahid kapoor had waited a few more years, who knows, it would have been like 6-7 mothers and 6-7 fathers with all the permutations and combinations.

    Manjhi has been a disgrace. Didn't he said 90% of the male have affairs with married women in reference to his son having an affair with a woman police officer. Why can't the court order him to vacate and police forcibly pulling him out of the bungalow.

    Well we live in the world of Acche din, so police have no work so they are asked to find missing animals and protect trees.

    Pankaja Munde, Smriti Irani, Sushma, Vasundhara, Mamta, Sonia......

    Ek baat to fix ho gayi hai- Modiji ki kundli mein aurat se sukh nahi hai....I

    hehe... i just loved that one. Now Amma aka Jayalalitha is coming with a vengence and mayawati is preparing.
     
  4. Balajee

    Balajee IL Hall of Fame

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    Kamalji Shahid is a good dancer and knows a lot of steps. Looks like now he has to reckon with many steps he doesn't know. Like at least two stepfathers, step-step mothers (wives of stepfathers) step-step brothers and sisters ( children of stepfathers and their wives other than his mom). That is more steps than even an able dancer like him can handle.
     
    4 people like this.
  5. Kamalji

    Kamalji IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear Satchi,
    my first cousin is invited to he wedding and she is not going, the passes are with me, want to go ?

    Well it is a small party, and i am sure Kareena is not invited.HAHA

    Regards

    kamal
     
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  6. Kamalji

    Kamalji IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear Aks,

    u are so farsighted, how come i did not think of this, that if he had waited sometime moer a few set of aprents could have been added !!!:)

    Did manji say that ? i am not aware, u are better informed about india, staying abroad , than me.Guruji when can i come to u for some knowledge ? Did he say that ? Wow.What a forward man, HAHA.

    Yes , modi wanted to convey that police will now work for searching for poor people's animals, and also protect their trees from vandals eh ! HAHA

    Amma and didi, well, they are on his side, dont worry, they wont trouble him more.HAHA

    Regards

    kamal

     
  7. Kamalji

    Kamalji IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear Balaji,

    With step fathers and step moms and step siblings, he has to match his steps eh ! HAHA

    You are damn witty Balaji.Too good.

    Regards

    kamal

     
  8. Akanksha1982

    Akanksha1982 IL Hall of Fame

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    Here it is.
    'Having an affair is a personal choice': Married CM Manjhi says 90 per cent of men date other men's wives  | Daily Mail Online
     
  9. Kamalji

    Kamalji IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear Aks,

    i read the link, and he says if a poor man steals he should dealt with leniently eh ! But if a rich man does, he must be punished.So acc to manji it is fine if someone has an affair with his wife , and daughter in law ?

    HAHA.

    You are sure updated, and now i know whom to contact when i want some juicy info Aks.

    HAHA

    Thanks a ton.

    Regards

    kamal

     

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