Relationship with spouse - an issue from day 1.

Please avail few holidays and have a pleasure trip with your familyy (family means, hubby and children alone and not with any of your or his relatives) to a far of place that suits your budget. And tell us your feed back after the trip..

Best wishes for continued happy married life,

 

amnilakshmi! Your husband hit you? And from your post it seems like a regular occurrence. Sorry, but physical violence is absolutely not acceptable. It is a crime punishable by law in any country you go to. It is not healthy for your child to see a parent being physically abused.

Honestly, what do you gain from this marriage? You don't have any love, no care, no compassion. Is he good father to your child? What would you lose if you end this marriage? It might be a drastic step for you, but, you are an independent woman. You are earning and very well capable of raising your child yourself.

In fact, you'll be able to be a better mom to your child if you are free of mental pressure from your husband. Every marriage is an equal partnership of the man and the woman. If the other partner cannot be responsive even after repeated attempts, and worse is ill-treating you, you need to preserve your self-respect and get out as soon as possible.

Your child cannot grow up in an abusive environment. No kid deserves it. All said, you have to realise you are in an abusive relationship and do what you think is best for you, your child and your personal safety.

Do read this link to understand more about domestic violence. In India there are laws to help women who are stuck in your situation. Quietly go to the police if he tries to harm you in any way.

Keep a bag ready with all your certificates, enough pairs of clean clothes for you and your child, enough cash to survive for a couple of weeks and a new sim card. If you ever feel that your safety is jeopardised. Just leave quietly. Speak to a trusted friend or family member and let them know of your situation. Ask them to take you in until you can find a place on your own. This is very important. Physical violence is serious. You don't deserve this. No one does. Everyone deserves to be loved and cared for.

Read this to learn more about domestic abuse. I hope you make the right choices for you and your child. Try to watch the movie 'Enough' in which Jennifer Lopez acts. It is about a abusive husband and how the woman gets out of the situation with her child. Good luck!

All about Domestic Violence

 

Hi ,
you should be careful when he has put malai.. u r not supposed to even touch him..just pray god and say sorry to him..
u dont hav to worry abt wht relatives say abt u..
Try to avoid such situations which cause fight..one cannot really change other person to take u out..but what u can do is u can slowly develop good friendship with ur friends and enjoy with ur kid.. try to find ways for enjoyment instead of searching tht with him..
Try to take some time off and stay with him..though he doesnt speak with u ..u still stay with him

 

he hitting you and abusing you physically and you forcing him to have sex??? gosh!!! what a marriage it is??? so do you think if he is intimate with you, all your issues will be resolved???

about the mala, dont worry just seek forgiveness from god and let him handle what he wants to do. but pls STOP this man handling, pushing, n throwing etc....you guys are not kids. GROWUP.

Also after he having EMA, you told hisparents and they are looking at you as enemy!!!!!!!!!! that speaks volumes....you should get it by now that his parents care a damn about you, they are blaming you for what their son did, and basically more than their sons EMA, what is bothering them is you exposing it...so now their son i.e your hsuband is also exposing you, abo ut what ever you do at home i.e asking him for sex or any other personal matter.

its like tit for tat kind of relationship now..and i dont know how long can you carry on such relationship!!!!why didnt you guys try to go for counselling....atleast try to understand each others expectation and complaints on whats wrong and why is this behaviour?

 

malai broke-probably god's warning that what he is doing is not right.He is not able to treat his wife and son properly then how can he be sincere in his devotion to god?any god fearing human being will not abuse his family members-may be god is unhappy with his attitude.Good that god is there with you.

Btw i have a doubt-why are you still in this relationship?is it because of society that you don't want to be called as a divorcee?if your son continues to grow in this environment then ur DIL will also suffer the same way as you.if you want to continue to live with this person as his wife then go for counselling.

 

malai broke-probably god's warning that what he is doing is not right.He is not able to treat his wife and son properly then how can he be sincere in his devotion to god?any god fearing human being will not abuse his family members-may be god is unhappy with his attitude.Good that god is there with you.

Btw i have a doubt-why are you still in this relationship?is it because of society that you don't want to be called as a divorcee?if your son continues to grow in this environment then ur DIL will also suffer the same way as you.if you want to continue to live with this person as his wife then both of you go for counselling as others have mentioned.