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Red Light Disrict Amsterdam ???????

Discussion in 'Married Life' started by EagerForInfo, Sep 29, 2019.

  1. EagerForInfo

    EagerForInfo Gold IL'ite

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    True but why these places with such a reputation one after another ?? Just 6 weeks after each other. Why ?? She was very open minded about the trips till she got curious as to what places the husband would visit and started googling online. That is what raised this whole topic. Otherwise when he came back too not a comment from his mouth about his trip , no emotions he just goes immediately back to work just handing over the elder kid some chocolates from Amsterdam. It’s just the pattern and the atmosphere that makes it odd.
     
  2. ragzz

    ragzz Silver IL'ite

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    You need to say “some men”, there are some who do and some who dont. Right?
     
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  3. Rihana

    Rihana Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    Why would you care? :wink:
    Depends on the data set?
     
  4. Aarushi

    Aarushi Platinum IL'ite

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    Hi OP,

    you are asking a bunch of complete strangers who don’t know this couple and this man about why the husband went to Amsterdam, why did he go to Vegas etc. how on earth will they know? Everyone will at best guess based on the prism of their own experience.

    The only person who really knows is the husband himself. And the only person who should ask him is the wife. And if she can not communicate her worry and concern with him, then she should start finding her voice in this so called marriage. more at the very least start Attempting to find her voice.

    Marriage is not the big celebration event where the priest comes and performs the ceremony. Marriage is not the staying in the same house and sharing the same last name. These are just symbols and outward manifestations of this thing called marriage. Marriage in its essence is a partnership that should have love, respect and communication as its foundations. A healthy marriage should be balanced with similar energy for sustaining it coming from both people.

    the biggest problem in the kind of marriage you have written about is not that the husband is going to Vegas or Amsterdam. It is the fear and insecurity inside the wife that she cannot voice her thoughts to her own spouse. It is the total lack of empathy from the husband to her distress.
     
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  5. Sunshine04

    Sunshine04 Platinum IL'ite

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    Well said !!!:clap2:
     
  6. Roar

    Roar Gold IL'ite

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    How can you 'help' her by asking this question...I don't understand, apart from feeding your curiosity how is it going to 'help'?.

    We have very less first hand info, this is a second hand question. The guy is having a fab time in good destinations and wife knows the story, only she can help herself if at all she wants to.

    I had a co worker who had a reputation at office spending time with a certain woman at office. All thinking changed when someone from his wife's office joined in as a contractor and eventually he spread the word that the guys wife had open affairs ( plural) at her ( his old) office. Who knows what is the truth really ...

    Don't feed on their drama... its theirs.
     
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  7. EagerForInfo

    EagerForInfo Gold IL'ite

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    Sorry this topic is being changed completely. How can u not help her ?? I’m just curious as to if anyone knows anything about these destinations and if anyone has any advice in this scenario. She is a close friend. I’ve known her since childhood and have always been near her. There is no way there is anything wrong in her part. I’m sure. 100 ,150 per cent. Someone could have husbands who have done same thing ( going to amdetrrsam and Vegas with friends ) and hey might be able to shed light and offer some clarity. Please don’t divert the topic. That is the reason I asked if someone else’s husband has done this ( with no wrong intentions in mind and with a happy marriage ) and if they could offer their perspective for our peace of mind. That is all. I am pretty sure if anyone else was in my shoes and my friends shoes they would do the same thing.
     
  8. Sunshine04

    Sunshine04 Platinum IL'ite

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    My husband's friend goes to Las Vegas just to have sex. Any one can have sex for money in any state in USA.
     
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  9. ashneys

    ashneys Platinum IL'ite

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    Amsterdam, Thailand, Las Vegas are known for their sex tourism, alcohol, drugs and gambling. People either prefer one of those sins aka fun, or two or all that those places offers.
    I know a few people who travels every year to either one of these countries just for these reasons and generally has a trend of sticking to a guys or girls only group. Half of them lies or covers up about what they did over there and in common circles you end up hearing about it anyways from someone else in the group. Or the other half shares or over shares. Varies person to person and the closeness as well.

    As for some of the people who hasn’t been to these destinations, this is definitely on their bucket list for atleast one (as per their preference) of those fun reasons.

    There is also a possibility that some people just love these destinations like how some people like Taj Mahal or Eiffel Tower.
     
    Last edited: Dec 27, 2019
  10. Roar

    Roar Gold IL'ite

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    Sorry, if you felt diverted.

    I still do not get how you are going to help your friend from the answers you get here.
    Anyways... I have written what I felt.

    I do know both kinds of men ( cousins of mine) that go for fun ( lap dance etc) and people who go for the vibe ( casino and the high life feel)... both to Las Vegas... depends on a person entirely. Monkey wants monkey do.
     
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