Real And Virtual Friends

Discussion in 'Community Chit-Chat' started by HazelPup, Jan 23, 2018.

  1. HazelPup

    HazelPup Platinum IL'ite

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    I recently realized that no matter how many friends we have online when we are in dire need it’s our real life friends that pitch in and help us as with virtual friends there’s only so much comfort or guidance they can provide. I was once too proud that I had many virtual friends but reality slowly dawned after years. Now I maintain a balanced relationship between both. I am not totally against in having virtual friends. We do learn so much online but only when all is happy and well.

    Do share your thoughts?
     
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  2. ashneys

    ashneys Platinum IL'ite

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    I feel real life friends are very important. There was a time during my early teens when I was obsessed with internet n had a million virtual friends. But everything changed when I got married (early marriage) n moved to a new place n once I had my child (early again), I understood the importance of real people as none of those virtual friends lived anywhere near me n I n my child needed real company, moms n kids of our age on a daily basis.

    Then as time went by, I realized that we wanted friends to hang out with everyday, play dates, kid-mom outings, getogethers etc - which all required real people. So my virtual friends became very less, even those were other mom groups, n I focused on real people, which was really difficult as I am an introvert by nature. But the loneliness was even harder, so just had to do it.

    Challenges with virtual friends are that many may not live closer to us, n distance can play a big role in building old or new friendships, or them helping us n us helping them.

    My mil once said, that our neighbors are the most important people than even the relatives because they are the only ones who can reach you the next second when in emergency, n that we should try to build a better friendship with them, n it has been proven true at many times - both ways, us helping - them helping. So wherever we relocate, they are the first friend's we make everytime. N if you find the right friends in that, it can last a lifetime even when we relocate again.

    More than virtual/ real, finding the 'right- matching' people is the biggest challenge in building a friendship, because it's all about the 'people' at the end of it. Have gotten my own set of cuts n bruises from people during these times n now learnt n understand that they come in all shapes n sizes n we just have to pick whom to get closer to n whom to keep in hi-bye or whom to run awayyyy from n to be 'cool' about the whole process.
     
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  3. MonikaSG

    MonikaSG Platinum IL'ite

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    Real friends are always good to have but I think we cannot talk about everything daily to them because of limitations of time and understanding. In virtual world we can discuss every thought that comes to our mind no matter how useful it is or not.
     
  4. HazelPup

    HazelPup Platinum IL'ite

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    @ashneys totally agree with you. Having good friends in real life where we can be there for each other in times of need is really important. Also agree with having good neighbors or even if within a town we have a good set of friends will go a long way in maintaining good relationships. Thanks for sharing a nice response
     
  5. HazelPup

    HazelPup Platinum IL'ite

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    @MonikaSG I do understand that virtually you feel more comfortable in sharing without being judged. But in Sharing happiness or otherwise all one can do is send good wishes alone. I am all up for all the moral support virtual friends can offer. I too have some like that. But now I found a balance between both. So started bonding better with my real world friends. Thanks for sharing your views
     
  6. MonikaSG

    MonikaSG Platinum IL'ite

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    Yes very true. I do like this because no one judging me. Feeling free to discuss my weaknesses too. I am same in real life too cannot keep lots of things inside. In real all my friends live far away and on phone too they talk too short as they are busy with their lives. That's why feel little lonely and like to spend more time here.
     
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  7. ksurender

    ksurender New IL'ite

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    You can't have 100 real friends around. When you are free n wanna discuss any thing its hard to find right friend at that very time but can find virtual one mostly times right sitting on your sofa. But one must not forget, real fun comes with real people.
     
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  8. Novalis

    Novalis Gold IL'ite

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    Amulet is my prominent online-only mate with no knowledge of her whereabouts, background, looks, diet, fashion sense, allergens and we never took compatibility quiz for the score to reveal to us on the sustainability of our venturesome and nevermindful banter. But I sense that she is the missing witch in the ‘Lancre Coven’ after Granny Weatherwax, Gytha Ogg and Magrat Garlic, which suits my own diabolical pysche that connects with her online trawl.

    The regulars of any online community pick specific involvement — could be creative writing, general share, activism, information inquiry, so forth — but their timely needs and indulgence is selective.

    My virtual orientation is conversational frolic about factual articles that induce curiosity. Amulet comes across as someone who rapidly sorts out in her shifting head, the size of “howl’s moving castle”, every form of dissociative talk.

    If your online need is fine-tuned in that conserved time and retaliatory ink you exert, then online platforms offer to match you with congenial takers.

    That way, online associations have been fulfilling to me because I partake only a slice in its vastness captivating me and don’t overload it with unreserved obligations, that, Amulet should gratifyingly inquire whether I ate idli, whether the chutney was okay, how am I feeling after eating that idli, what’s for lunch, how’s the weather today, and some fraught nicety.

    I enjoy the hovering and chaotic scrum we are to each other over the range of impassive to intense (yet unnecessarily) solicitations between mission-driven Phantom Amulet and Guran Novalis to capsize the online tranquility with our observational jottings.
     
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