Read This!!! Laugh till death...

Discussion in 'Jokes' started by vivbass, Mar 26, 2008.

  1. vivbass

    vivbass Gold IL'ite

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    You will laugh your heads out after you finish reading this!!! (Nice One From Reader Digest)One day I met a sweet gentleman and fell in love. When it became apparent that we would marry, I made the supreme sacrifice and gave up eating beans.

    Some months later, on my birthday, my car broke down on the way home from work. Since I lived in the countryside I called my husband and told him that I would be late because I had to walk home. On my way, I passed by a small diner and the odour of baked beans was more than I could stand. With miles to walk, I figured that I would walk off any ill effects by the time I reached home, so I stopped at the dinner and before I knew it, I had consumed three large orders of baked beans.

    All the way home, I made sure that I released all the gas. Upon my arrival, my husband seemed excited to see me and exclaimed delightedly: "Darling I have a surprise for dinner tonight." He then blindfolded me and led me to my chair at the dinner table. I took a seat and just as he was about to remove my blindfold, the telephone rang. He made me promise not to touch the blindfold until he returned and went to answer the call. The baked beans I had consumed were still affecting me and the pressure was becoming most unbearable, so while my husband was out of the room I seized the opportunity, shifted my weight to one leg and let one go. It was not only loud, but it smelled like a fertilizer truck running over a skunk in front of a pulpwood mill.

    I took my napkin from my lap and fanned the air around me vigorously. Then, shifting to the other cheek, I ripped off three more. The stink was worse than stinking cabbage. Keeping my ears carefully tuned to the conversation in the other room, I went on like this for another few minutes.<SCRIPT><!--D(["mb","\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003eThe pleasure was indescribable. When eventually the telephone farewells signaled the end of my freedom, I quickly fanned the air a few more times with my napkin, placed it on my lap and folded my hands back on it feeling very relieved and pleased with myself. My face must have been the picture of innocence when my husband returned, apologizing for taking so long. \u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003eHe asked me if I had peeked through the blindfold, and I assured him I had not. At this point, he removed the blindfold, and twelve dinner guests seated around the table chorused: \u0026quot;Happy Birthday!\u0026quot;!! *I nearly died!!! \u003c/span\u003e\u003c/font\u003e\u003c/font\u003e\u003c/div\u003e\n\n\u003cdiv dir\u003d\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cfont color\u003d\"#800000\"\u003e\n\u003caddress\u003e\u003cfont face\u003d\"Arial\" color\u003d\"#000000\" size\u003d\"2\"\u003e\u003c/font\u003e\u003c/address\u003e\u003c/font\u003e*\u003c/div\u003e\u003c/div\u003e\u003c/div\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cfont color\u003d\"#3333ff\"\u003eRegards,\u003cbr\u003e",1]);D(["mb","\u003cspan class\u003dsg\u003eKarthikeyan\u003c/span\u003e",1]);D(["mb","\u003c/font\u003e\u003c/strong\u003e\n",0]);D(["ce"]);//--></SCRIPT>

    The pleasure was indescribable. When eventually the telephone farewells signaled the end of my freedom, I quickly fanned the air a few more times with my napkin, placed it on my lap and folded my hands back on it feeling very relieved and pleased with myself. My face must have been the picture of innocence when my husband returned, apologizing for taking so long.

    He asked me if I had peeked through the blindfold, and I assured him I had not. At this point, he removed the blindfold, and twelve dinner guests seated around the table chorused: "Happy Birthday!"!! I nearly died!!!
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  2. meera2503

    meera2503 Senior IL'ite

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    Big LaughBig LaughBig LaughBig LaughBig Laugh what a shame , poor lady
     
  3. revathy45

    revathy45 Bronze IL'ite

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    That was hilarious!!!
    what a Bowshame though!!!
    Revathy.
     
  4. Nandshyam

    Nandshyam IL Hall of Fame

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    Big LaughBig LaughBig LaughBig LaughBig LaughBig LaughBig Laugh

    Very niceeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

    That was really really a good one!!
     
  5. Venonimiss

    Venonimiss Bronze IL'ite

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    ha..ha..I read this long time ago. It cracks me up even now!
     
  6. puni88

    puni88 Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

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    Me too... read earlier this one.
     
  7. tinku

    tinku Silver IL'ite

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    Couldnt stop laughing for a looooooooooooong time.

    Very much ridiculous.......
     
  8. dakshayaeni

    dakshayaeni Silver IL'ite

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    ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha, can't stop, pls help!
     
  9. sl28

    sl28 New IL'ite

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    ha ha awesome joke
     

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