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Problems of old age or preparing for old age.

Discussion in 'General Discussions' started by ennaye, Mar 12, 2010.

  1. ennaye

    ennaye Silver IL'ite

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    Hi All,

    I have chosen to write on this subject for both the senior citizens and those who are preparing to get there. And also hoping to get some inputs from everyone.

    My experience, both personal and observed is that the senior problems can all be put under one heading:
    HEALTH

    1. Physical Health

    2. Emotional and Mental Health

    3.Financial Health

    Preperation for senior years should begin in younger days.
    Eat well, eat nutritious food and abstain from bad habits like smoking and alcohol. These have a long term effect and tend to catch up in old age.

    If we are lucky enough to reach the senior years without any health problems , we will need to maintain that health.

    Emotional and mental health is ofcourse dependant on many factors, some may be beyond our control , but as far as possible DON"T WORRY!!

    We , ladies especially ,have a habit of worrying. Take each day as it comes and move on.
    It is easier said than done. If I have a worry free day, I start wondering isn't there something I am missing?
    Most times are fine , later one realises-- oh! That was no reason to worry!!

    A VERY , VERY IMPORTANT Factor in our well being is financial health. Plan to have enough resources in your own hand for old age. This is the age when our economic activity dwindles and we fall back on what is saved during earlier years. Do not bank upon or be dependant on anyone, including your children, for your material needs.

    If you have children who take care of your needs, be grateful for the bonus and do not take it for granted.

    Indian families are habitually inclined to save. Also, there is in Indian culture a certain regard for elders and family. But things are fast changing. So being financially secure and independant is definitely a wise move.

    And finally , I am tempted to remind all of us the oft quoted Bette Davis quote, " Old age ain't for sissies".
     
    sindmani and Padmini like this.
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  2. Padmini

    Padmini IL Hall of Fame

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    Dear ennaye,
    A really wonderful and timely post. You have clearly
    pointed out the three "Health". It is true to have a happy life a senior citizen should possess these three things without fail.
    The security to health and happiness of our life is the investments made by us today. One can open an account in the Life Bank wherein he saves something everyday and invest in future. The small investments made in terms of money, love, pleasure, trust and time grows with time and available to the man in abundance in the time of his need. The abundance creates security and security creates peace and happiness.An active mind doesn't have time to reflect on getting old. As a senior you have more opportunity to exercise your mental functioning by doing crosswords or playing challenging games with the grandkids.If planned properly one can enjoy the golden years of life as one is free from worldly responsibilities.
    with love
    pad
     
  3. ennaye

    ennaye Silver IL'ite

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    Dear Pad,

    You write so well. I especially like the idea of opening an account in Life Bank. How true!!

    Sometime ago I read a great one'liner which said " Be good to your children for they are going to decide which old age home you are going to".

    Of course , I hope I won't be dumped in any old age home. Banking on God's kindness!!:lol:
     
  4. Chitvish

    Chitvish Moderator IL Hall of Fame

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    Friends,
    I think, we have to develop practising 'detached attachment' with our children, once they are on their own.
    In all my relationships with my children, rather interactions , I give my best. I work hard to mature & cherish them. My attachment with them is complete. However , I remain detached in the sense that I do not expect them to reciprocate my affection. Most importantly , I make a conscious effort , not to interfere or pass judgements on the lives they choose to lead. My concern for my near & dear ones will not fade with my detachment. If you let go of the ones you love , they will never go away – this is the beauty of attachment with detachment ! I have learnt to love & let go.This dictum has developed tolerance in me. When I let the people live the way they want to , I learn to accept them for what they are. Most importantly , I learn to tolerate the world around me & this tolerance brings in me a sense of peace & contentment. I ask God to guide me in being loving , compassionate , tolerant & understanding when I interact with others. If a person wants to share a thought or concern with me I want that person to feel comfortable to do so. I want to remain peaceful & approachable to others. Before I speak , I pray to God to give me the right words so that I express myself clearly & with consideration to others.

    Since both my children live in Chennai, I follow this very strictly, you know why !
    Now I have realised that we start growing mentally much more only after the children leave the house & we have to tackle the emotional vacuum, that arises, along with age-related problems like menopause which set in simultaneously.
    I find this is the most testing period for a woman, as well & emerging successfully is a slow process.
    Developing a hobby, keeping oneself mentally & emotionally occupiedhave to be consciously developed to keep boredom at bay!
    Love,
    Chithra.
     
    Last edited: Mar 12, 2010
    sindmani likes this.
  5. ennaye

    ennaye Silver IL'ite

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    Wow, Chithra your view of perfect understanding with the children are great.

    Remember the 'vanaprastha' and the 'sanyas' ashramas from our scriptures?
    I am sure they too must have meant the detached attachment that you speak of.

    My son is abroad. Distance ofcourse sees to it that there is minimum interference and no oppurtunity to:rant. Ha!! Ha !! Otherwise who knows......
    I could be one of those ranting MILs. No! honestly speaking, one should know how to get along with all relationships. That is the measure of success in any family relationship.

    Looking forward to more insightful posts from all. One learns throughout ones life.
     
  6. geetabhaskar

    geetabhaskar Senior IL'ite

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    Dear ennaye.

    It is rightly said by people to follow detached attachment during old age. But I wonder whether this applies to our ministers, politicians etc. For they are still attached to their "chairs" and hold on to it till their last breath. Is there no retirement age for them. When are they going to give way for the youth to run the country?
    Wizdom comes through age and experience. So they should hand over the baton to the youth and guide them with their valuable advice. This applies in running the house
    as well. Life would become so easy if there is a mutual trust and respect between the young and the old.

    With love
    Geeta Bhaskar
     
  7. AshaRaya

    AshaRaya New IL'ite

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    Opening an account in Life Bank, or something similar is a great idea. All seniors should be smart with their money. Also agree that preperation for senior years should begin in younger days.
     

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