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Problem With 4 year old coping with new baby:(

Discussion in 'Schoolgoers & Teens' started by enlightened, Dec 21, 2009.

  1. enlightened

    enlightened Bronze IL'ite

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    Dear Friends,
    I recently delivered a baby boy.My DS who is 4 yrs old was well prepared for the arrival of his sibling.However, its been 10 days since I was discharged from the hospitl and I find it difficult to control him.He loves his bro, but when I am feeding the baby, he gets annoyed and wants to hit him.At other times he adores his lil bro.Also, my well behaved four yr old has turned into brat.He wets his pants,shouts at home and is giving me a tough time:(Sometimes I cant help it and spank him.I end up feeling so guilty that I myself start weeping...
    I have a lot of help.There is a lady who takes care of the baby, my MIL and mom are here, hubby also pitches in...but somehow all of us are under stress as my DS has suddenly changed from a quite kid to a naughty brat.
    How do we deal with this?Please share ur inputs...

    Deepa.
     
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  2. josiraj

    josiraj New IL'ite

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    Hallo my dear

    The best thing that I would suggest from my experience is, you take care of the first child and let others (may be hubby, mom or MIL) attend your second child (exept breatfeeding). Let them take care of all his needs. Assure your first son not with words but in action that your love for him is the same as before. You bath him, give him food, change his clothes, put him to bed, tell stories...Spend time with him a lot...gradually you feel the change.
    From what you have written, i understand clearly that your son lacks attention from YOU. He finds it difficult to accept you attending the new baby. Attend all his needs...the solution to your problem..Ask others to take care of the new born for few weeks...

    All the Best.
     
  3. Mahajanpragati

    Mahajanpragati Platinum IL'ite

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    hi,
    give him time.just don't feed infront of him & try that he doesn't hurt the baby.don't leave him alone with baby.
    give him lots of attention .like josiraj said..........
    also,see that other member of the family give him 1st importance & attention.like when hubby comes from office ,tell him to inquire about the elder one 1st & then about u & baby.
    start the 'star 'system at home.if he helps u with any small work u give him a star but if he misbehaves with u or baby,u deduct his star.try this it really helps.
    don't spank him.it will make situation worse & make him even more hostile towards the baby.
    take care
    pragati
     

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