Nothing new to post. Continued with the no yelling, no lecturing. "No" means almost none. Total lack of yelling would make me eligible for sainthood ahead of Mother Teresa. Any stuff not done or likely to not get done, I remind them periodically with the calmness of the GPS directions lady. When it is too late, I just do it myself, help them do it, or live with it not done, all without yelling. It continues to work. More getting done. They do realize and I can see some contriteness. Net result has been much happier dinner times.