Poll on Dowry

Discussion in 'News & Politics' started by enjoylife, Jan 17, 2008.

  1. enjoylife

    enjoylife New IL'ite

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    Dowry

    dowry in south India
    is it true that if guy is from u.s. than bride"s parents have to pay more dowry
    like car and cash and gold etc.etc.
    because i don't know but one of my friend told me that her parents even paid to groom 5 lakes cash.
    what do you think is it right?
     
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  2. enjoylife

    enjoylife New IL'ite

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    What is your opinion on DOWRY SYSTEM ?
    Is it Healthy for our society?
     
  3. Aarushi

    Aarushi Platinum IL'ite

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    Hi Enjoylife,

    Interesting topic. What's your view on this?

    My take is that how can anything that demeans women be healthy for society?

    It "might" have originally started off as a means of giving a girl her inheritance but I doubt that the original intent is recognized anywhere as most of the people who take dowry, keep it for themselves and do not give the girl anything.

    All I have seen is that it promotes greed of the worst order, disrespect and perpetuation of the gross inequalities in the Indian society towards the girl child.

    How many times do we hear after the birth of a girl that "now you should start worrying about her dowry /marriage" from sundry relatives (often women)?

    Isn't there something fundamentally wrong in this thinking?? That some people consign the entire life of a brand new human being (an occasion which should be a time of celebration and great joy for everybody) to such an unpalatable and obnoxious statement??

    If one wants more money, then they should go and work for it. And not try to get it by selling themselves or their sons (in the name of culture and dowry). Not a very nice thing in my opinion.

    love,
    Aarushi
     
  4. Jaishree123

    Jaishree123 Senior IL'ite

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    hi

    Dowry system does no good for women. It can never be right.
    if its given by the parents of a girl then its okay..but when its demanded by the groom's parents it is called dowry.


    my opinion is this system should be eliminated from the roots.
    but there are lot of loopholes in our system.

    there is a poll going on in NDTV on the same dowry issue.

    Jaishree
     
  5. enjoylife

    enjoylife New IL'ite

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    Definition Of Dowry :- Dowry or Dahej is the payment in cash or/and kind by the bride's family to the bridegroom' s family along with the giving away of the bride ( called Kanyadaan) in Indian marriage . Kanyadanam is an important part of Hindu marital rites. Kanya means daughter, and dana means gift.



    Dowry originated in upper caste families as the wedding gift to the bride from her family. The dowry was later given to help with marriage expenses and became a form of insurance in the case that her in-laws mistreated her. Although the dowry was legally prohibited in 1961, it continues to be highly institutionalized. The groom often demands a dowry consisting of a large sum of money, farm animals, furniture, and electronics.<?XML:NAMESPACE PREFIX = O />

    so in my view this dowry system should be stopped.

     
  6. Ria2006

    Ria2006 Silver IL'ite

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    I personally find it nuisance. And I am happy that I was born to parents who were strictly against it.

    we neither gave any dowry for my wedding nor took any took dowry for my brother's marriage. So I guess change starts from our ownselves. Doing what we belive is what is required to finish menace of dowry. I know people around me, who despite of being financially independent and educated coughed up huge sum of money for gettign more qualified guys, I would say , those very people are responsible for carrying it forward.

    Say NO strictly. No matter how much good an alliance. If the person is not ready to accept you without a cash payment, show him the door.
     
  7. Shobanag

    Shobanag Bronze IL'ite

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    The answer to the question is a great big unequivocal NO!!
     
  8. GPriya

    GPriya Bronze IL'ite

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    Hi Ilites,

    A BIG NO is my vote for dowry system. But the pity is, in India even the socalled educated and established guys (grooms) have no say about it when it comes to their marriage in the name of respecting their parents wishes!!!!!!!!!!!!

    In my opinion, men have to fight to get rid of Dowry more than women, as the dowry is not given happily by any woman's family, its forced out of them to satisfy the groom's family. So it is responsibility of the groom to strongly say No to it.
    No amount of law can get rid of this dowry system as long as people men nod their head for whatever their parents say. Even the love marriages are no exception to it. Until the love blossoms the guys behave differently and when it comes to the topic of marriage, the ball is in the court of guy's parents who make life hell for the girl and her parents.

    Well, this is a single most factor in India today for the downfall of the society.

    Regards,
    Geeth Priya.
     
  9. Sumeru

    Sumeru New IL'ite

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    NO,NO,NO

    This is one of the filthy customs that's sucking the happiness out many people's (ladies) lives. I really can't figure out how this ugly facet got added to our rich Indian culture. Rant
     
  10. sharadha

    sharadha Bronze IL'ite

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    Dowry system would be really good, if its practiced like Arabic customs. In arabic marriages, the groom has to pay a hefty sum to the bride and should promise to provide healthy living comforts. :)

    But back home in India, the most pathetic thing is that, many educated guys esp NRIs, returning for marriage to India, keep quiet, when their parents demand for dowry :x !!
     

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