1. How to Build Positivity in Married Life? : Click Here
    Dismiss Notice

Plzzz Friends Need Your Best Opinion

Discussion in 'Friends & Neighbours' started by harun, Apr 9, 2016.

  1. harun

    harun Senior IL'ite

    Messages:
    343
    Likes Received:
    9
    Trophy Points:
    23
    Gender:
    Female
    Hi,
    I am a average good looking women in my late thirties married with kids (school going).I have my friend(guy) neighbour when i was small had played together.Even he is alos married and having kids.He is in my socila networking site.Whenever i post few pics many a times he comments that "after long time i am looking sooo cute/lovely ","loved you today",kind off comments also he sends me flower posters along with that.
    while chatting we chat about family kids and all. very normal talks.
    Whther a guy sending such kind of commnets are these days NORMAL or i am just over reacting to it.
     
    Loading...

  2. generic

    generic Gold IL'ite

    Messages:
    942
    Likes Received:
    763
    Trophy Points:
    188
    Gender:
    Female
    If a girl makes such comments towards her lady friends it's considered perfectly ok..in case of guys I don't know..:)
     
    anika987 and sindmani like this.
  3. HYDGIRL1234

    HYDGIRL1234 Silver IL'ite

    Messages:
    245
    Likes Received:
    89
    Trophy Points:
    68
    Gender:
    Female
    Comments are read by everybody.so better be careful. even though u both r good friends others may have diff view
     
    sindmani and anika987 like this.
  4. Gauri03

    Gauri03 Moderator Staff Member IL Hall of Fame

    Messages:
    5,885
    Likes Received:
    12,147
    Trophy Points:
    445
    Gender:
    Female
    It could be completely harmless. Having known someone since childhood does allow one certain liberties that you wouldn't normally approve of. Personally, I would find it very odd, but then I don't have any childhood guy friends. If it's a one off thing, take it in your stride. Don't make any particular acknowledgement of it. Your silence will convey how you feel. If he's sensible he'll take a step back.
     
  5. harun

    harun Senior IL'ite

    Messages:
    343
    Likes Received:
    9
    Trophy Points:
    23
    Gender:
    Female
    he was my neighbour friend during school days after 10th moved to dffrent places so lost touch from past 1 year again we got connected.now we are married with kids.
     
  6. Ragini25

    Ragini25 Platinum IL'ite

    Messages:
    2,484
    Likes Received:
    4,111
    Trophy Points:
    283
    Gender:
    Female
    harun, why does your gender say Male?
     
  7. harun

    harun Senior IL'ite

    Messages:
    343
    Likes Received:
    9
    Trophy Points:
    23
    Gender:
    Female
     
  8. maya9876

    maya9876 Silver IL'ite

    Messages:
    106
    Likes Received:
    86
    Trophy Points:
    68
    Gender:
    Female
    Hi Op,

    The fact that you are questioning his comments and asking for opinions here itself tells me you are not comfortable with it.

    I wouldnt say your friend's behavior is normal or common as I have grown up with a lot of guys friends and still keep in touch with them. Be it on whatsapp or social networking sites, in private or in public it is important to to not cross lines with the opposite gender.

    If i were you I would limit my private conversations with him and not respond to his compliments. He might be good at heart but sending roses, saying 'love you today', going over board with compliments especially on a public forum can be misconstrued by others.
     
    generic and HYDGIRL1234 like this.
  9. harun

    harun Senior IL'ite

    Messages:
    343
    Likes Received:
    9
    Trophy Points:
    23
    Gender:
    Female
    sending that red ROSE he do in whatsapp thtas y i wanted to know particular meaning.He is definetly good at heart his conversations are also realted asking about my family kids ,realtives ,husband .But how to find out his intention if anything wrong or not ,we are at diffrent places .so no talking on phones.
     
    Last edited: Apr 11, 2016
    sindmani likes this.
  10. generic

    generic Gold IL'ite

    Messages:
    942
    Likes Received:
    763
    Trophy Points:
    188
    Gender:
    Female
    It gets very awkward when a male friend makes such comments on photos of a married woman..neutral comments like "nice pic ", "looking good" etc maybe ok..but anything more than that maybe misunderstood by other people on your friends list looking at the pic..it gives way to unnecessary gossip...you wouldn't want such a situation where your husband thinks you are flirting with your friend.
    If he sends you rose on what's app just reply with a question mark and ask what it's for? See what he replies..
    I have a suggestion..whenever you post a pic why don't you edit your privacy settings on Facebook so the pic is not visible to him?next to the photo itself you have the privacy setting where you edit the audience who can view the pic..I suggest that you create a group with whom you feel comfortable sharing pics and exclude him from it..then make the pic visible only to that group. Problem solved.
     
    Last edited: Apr 11, 2016
    rachaputi, sindmani and yellowmango like this.

Share This Page