Please Help Me

There is way too much drama already going on. If you are not married to such a guy, why even bother going through this mental torture? There are plenty of guys out there and he is not the last one. The whole thing sounds so fishy how can you even hang around for this guy? I am sorry to say but there seem to be a lot of mistakes on your part and a bit of immaturity as well.

You seem desperate to get into a relationship at any cost. You are not really seeing all the warning signs that are right in front of you. Wake up and start to see things for what they are. If there is a small doubt, you should clear it up as soon as possible with any guy you are looking at as a prospective groom. If you just leave it aside and keep on giving benefit of the doubt, there is a greater chance of you regretting it and making even bigger mistakes. Right now, you have a daughter who is going to get involved in a mess along with you so keep her wellbeing as a priority and whenever in doubt, don't hang around because you really like a guy. You are putting your daughter at risk here.

The thing with internet, chat rooms, and especially matrimonial sites is that people are lurking around to trap girls/women to satisfy their pervert thoughts/imaginations and sometimes even for bigger scandals.

When my sister had her profile on many of the matrimonial sites, she used to get responses from such psychos we were really scared for a while to trust anyone who contacted her via email. She was smart enough to never give out addresses, phone numbers and gauge people before sharing too much info on her and the family.

Sorry to be blunt but you seem to be acting like a teenager here rather than a mature adult. I only responded here for the sake of your daughter so please don’t get involved in such a relationship. There is no doubt in my mind that this guy is no good for you.

I don’t know much about your past and looks like you are on the way to divorce yourself from one of the poster’s remarks. At this time, concentrate on getting yourself independent financially by getting a job if you don’t have one. Look after the wellbeing of your daughter and get strong mentally to deal with your life as a single parent and a divorcee.

If I were you, I would stop talking to this guy immediately and block him completely from everything that he has access to online.

 

B, there's nothing wrong searching for a groom. You will get married eventually don't worry. First get rid of the existing pain, secondly gain adequate clarity of mind. I know it is lonely out there. The best way is participate in these forums which will give you a sense of companionship. When you read and respond to others problems you will start looking at issues from a different perspective.

When you are mentally clear and emotionally stable, search for alliances. You will find the right person.

 

Bagiya,
The fact that you are asking here itself means that deep in your heart, you suspect that something is wrong. Please stay away from him.

Raji

 

Well said CanWait.

Bagiya,

Family and friends love you and they want to see you happily settled at the earliest. But decision about whom you will be getting married to not only impacts your life but also of your daughter's. So take your time to find the right person and decide on getting married if and only if you are completely convinced about the person.

My best wishes for your future

-Lakshmi

 

Do not think twice about it... do all that it takes to stop him from contacting u. i understand its good to have someone who cares for us but in todays world, u cannot trust someone in whom u cant find any fault. here this man is full of mystery. leave it and stay away from him. happiness will come your way.

 

What type of guys looks for a second wife when he's still married to the first one???? :bonk

Going through a divorce is not the same as BEING divorced. Going through a divorce means he is still married, and hence should not be looking for a new spouse until his divorce is finalized. And really, I doubt this guy is even going for a divorce. Looks like he's just playing around with your emotions.

A person cannot be emotionally open to a new relationship if they are still entangled in an old relationship.

 

Don't waste your time on this guy. He is trying to play mind games with you and his so-called wife. Also you yourself know that there is something thats not right on the other end.. Wife calling and telling she's pregnant and this guy playing non-sense games.... Just STOP all contacts with this guy.. And by the way, if you get into trouble, you ARE ruining your daughter's life also. Please think responsibly.

 

Dear Bagiya,
I read your post, I think your situation made you confused, you believe he is a good person but even then you have a doubt by all this things hapenning around you.So you want some one to say whether the things around you good or bad. No doubt you need a companionship as you are in young age and your daughter needs a father.
If you try to hold yourself to not to call, mail, or chat, but you can't. Slowly you can understand everything who is that person? what do you say is correct if suppose he is good you don't want to leave him, so the only way is you try talk very politely and observe everything, then take the decision. I hope that person may be good his situation may be wrong. bye take care

 

My only advise for you about this guy : RUN..
He looks like a very unstable person for one. Whatever his personal situation is, he should not be pursuing you this crazily even before his divorce his finalized.
You need to be strong and not be desparate to be in another relationship. no matter what your friends say. Now you have a child with you and be very very strong for her sake.
Try to live your life happily, if you are destined to be married again, it will happen. 4 years - 6 years maybe 10 years. But you need to wait for the right person to come along.
I dont think any sane guy would tell a woman in second conversation that he has a premature ejaculation problem.
RUN..