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Please help...Husband and Inlaws forcing to leave my job...

Discussion in 'Relationship With In-Laws' started by krs, Feb 25, 2013.

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  1. Feb 25, 2013 #11
    shantisubra

    shantisubra Gold IL'ite

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    Hi

    Dont leave the job in any circumstances under the pressure of MiL and Husband especially when they are stingy and after money and your hus giving his salary to his mother for household expenditure. Grow up girl and your man.. be smart and make your MiL understand that only if you work she can get her some nice gifts, sarees etc. and also time passes quickly.... the child growth will not be affected if are a stay at home mom or working mom. The baby grows. Its your life and your achievement which you have to protect.

    Explain this to your mil and hus in a polite and intelligent way without showing any anger or hatred. If they dont understand, you may leave your kid at a child care and continue the job.

    Best Regards
    Shanti
     
    Last edited: Feb 25, 2013
    shantisubra, Feb 25, 2013
    shantisubra, Feb 25, 2013
    #11
  2. Feb 25, 2013 #12
    hrastro

    hrastro Platinum IL'ite

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    3 YEARS ???? He hasnt seen your child???? What sort of people populate the planet ????!!! And you want to leave your security for this man and his family???

    OK - you might get offended by this question, but do your inlaws/husband object to the influence/importance that the MD holds on you ???? why do they not LIKE him?? and whether they like him or not, it is just a job, right? So, what do they have against this man or this job???

    And, are they ok with you having another job???
     
    hrastro, Feb 25, 2013
    hrastro, Feb 25, 2013
    #12
    3 people like this.
  3. Feb 25, 2013 #13
    shantisubra

    shantisubra Gold IL'ite

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    Hi

    If your hus and Mil dont like your MD or your working, is that stopping him / them to even see your 3 year old baby? What non-sense......... They lost their senses. They dont deserve to have you especially seeing the family condition of yours.... A father who lost his leg, brother studying, and you serving them also in a small way..... so what is your inlaws problem here. Instead of helping you they try to play you down. Is your child a girl baby? May be that is the reason.......if that is the reason, they are not to be respected at all.

    I wonder why these people have this doubts and dislikes on one's own spouse and their family? Is marriage required any more? Is it divine any more? If yes, divinity is for women only and men are above all and their mothers????????

    Gud luck to you.
    Shanti
     
    shantisubra, Feb 25, 2013
    shantisubra, Feb 25, 2013
    #13
    1 person likes this.
  4. Feb 25, 2013 #14
    Iamagoodgirl

    Iamagoodgirl Platinum IL'ite

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    dont do that.That will be suicidal.
     
    Iamagoodgirl, Feb 25, 2013
    Iamagoodgirl, Feb 25, 2013
    #14
  5. Feb 25, 2013 #15
    krs

    krs Bronze IL'ite

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    My inlaw and Husb preception is my MD is influencing me and my family but whic is not true. He gives advice which is right/wrong because my parents are innocent and believes everything and everybody. But he hasnot interfered in my married life. The reason why they doesnot like him is because he get importance from my parents which these people are not getting. My Husb when speaking first says take care of child being at home after i oppose then he says you first leave this job and come here we will decide whether to go to other job or not. But i doubt they will allow me to work. I also earn more than my Husb.

    Infact myself and my father had told about my MD before marriage and they praised him aswell. May be they acted to get his son married since he was in mid 30.But arenot they cheated me by giving false promises that i can go to this job till my health permits..... before marriage.How do i now believe them.

    I had sacrifised a lot during my married period. My parents place was just a street away but i havenot visited them once after marriage. But they tell others that i never wanted to go to my mothers place. They had made me cry a lot. Infact when my pregnancy medicine got over my husb cooly said ask ur mother to get it on monday, since first child expenses should be taken care by them. Can u image how stingy they are. My husb says see the serials always women should be dependent in their inlaws house so as to be your parents, how cruel they are. I thought my husb is innocent but it not right atleast with me. There are lot more about them but no time and energy...

    Now i dont have anything in mind except my child, who is affectionate towards me and my parents.
     
    krs, Feb 25, 2013
    krs, Feb 25, 2013
    #15
  6. Feb 25, 2013 #16
    ShilpaMa

    ShilpaMa IL Hall of Fame

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    were your inlaws hoping that the MD of your company will offer a bigger job (compared to you) to your husband... and hence are severly put down for not getting any benefit of your links?

    Your husb and inlaws suffer from inferiority complex.. about job, salary and now I guess about DNA of the child.
     
    ShilpaMa, Feb 25, 2013
    ShilpaMa, Feb 25, 2013
    #16
    1 person likes this.
  7. Feb 25, 2013 #17
    krs

    krs Bronze IL'ite

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    Its difficult to predict them, one time they will speak about my MD with regards and very soon they will scold with bad words(this is my MIL). I dont think they need job bcs at the beginning itself my husb told me donot ever think i will come to your company for work.. i never asked him to do that. Infact my husb also knows that i had reduced my salary during marriage because it should not be cause for ego between us. But now he is not thinking how much i had sacrifised for his sake and tells me money is important for you and not ur husb. Since i have suffered a lot in my childhood i donot want my child to undergo. Thats why am sticking to go for work (where iam safe and have security).
     
    krs, Feb 25, 2013
    krs, Feb 25, 2013
    #17
    1 person likes this.
  8. Feb 25, 2013 #18
    Poonamk1

    Poonamk1 Silver IL'ite

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    Do not leave ur job.. how much careless and heartless dad is ur H.. so bad..

     
    Poonamk1, Feb 25, 2013
    Poonamk1, Feb 25, 2013
    #18
    1 person likes this.
  9. Feb 25, 2013 #19
    SKMK

    SKMK New IL'ite

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    i agree to silpama.

    hello friend, please note that you are having trust issues in ur mrg. i think you have to concentrate on trust problems if u want ur mrg reln to work. else pls dont spoil ur life by leading with that person and more important dont leave job
     
    Last edited: Feb 25, 2013
    SKMK, Feb 25, 2013
    SKMK, Feb 25, 2013
    #19
    1 person likes this.
  10. Feb 25, 2013 #20
    SGBV

    SGBV IL Hall of Fame

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    Your work is not a problem here. Something is really missing, OP please clarify.

    Scenario 1
    Your husband is suspicious about your relationship with your MD, since you and your folks talks too much about him. He gives you too much freedom and importance and also salary in his office. Your in laws might have poisioned him this way, hence is might be doubting the paternity of your son. This could be a valid reason for someone not seeing his own son for 3 years...

    Scenario 2
    Your husband is supper jealous on your career achievements and salary (since it is higher than you), but thinks you are in a better position because of your supportive MD. He is unable to accept this fact; hence hate your MD

    Please elaborate further to come up with a solution
     
    SGBV, Feb 25, 2013
    SGBV, Feb 25, 2013
    #20
    4 people like this.
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