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PlayDate with American Kids

Discussion in 'Schoolgoers & Teens' started by Mahisneha, Mar 15, 2010.

  1. Mahisneha

    Mahisneha New IL'ite

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    My daughter is 5 years old. She got a invitation from her class mate mother for the playdate. I am not so interested in this. But my daughter wants to go and play over there. We don't know much about them.
    Is it advisable to sent her for a play date? Please pour your views.
     
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  2. Nitha J

    Nitha J IL Hall of Fame

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    I feel it is perfectly ok to sent your LO. I guess you are worried about the "cultural difference".
    Just check if you are comfortable with their parenting style. Do not think just because it is an american family; you should stop your LO.
    As the children grow they are going to interact with members diverse community; whether you(parents) like it or not. So be open about it.
    Let your LO have a great time
    -Nitha
     
  3. Pavarun

    Pavarun Silver IL'ite

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    I would call the mother and ask her if you can stay with your daughter since this is the first time. While you are there, try to get to know the mom a little better. When the kids are young, it is okay for the parent to be there to supervise, especially if you don't know the other family very well. You can also suggest that the first couple of playdates be a neutral venue like a park or playground. Once you are comfortable with the mom (depends on your comfort level) you can leave the children for a playdate.
     
  4. Manaswini08

    Manaswini08 Bronze IL'ite

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    I have 2 daughters (13 and 10) and I still don't allow them to go the homes of their American classmates. Birthday parties are different but no play dates. I do allow them to go and play at Indian friends' houses and only those that I know very well.

    When the parents call, I tell them that we do not allow them to go due to culture differences and the parents understand...just be honest. I've also explained this to my daughters and they are ok with it.

    But the decision is up to you.
     
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  5. Riyasmommy

    Riyasmommy Silver IL'ite

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    Mahisneha, I agree with Sindhu, and I would do the same too. I would ask to be present at the playgroup, and try to get to know the mom better while the kids are playing. You never know what kind of friendships you can make! I have made some really good friends through my daughter's playgroups.

    You can also refuse politely, and try to get together with them at a local park or museum. Just wondering why you don't want to let your daughter go for this playdate? Is it cultural difference or something else. I wouldn't send Riya to a house if I don't get good 'vibes' from the family - and that would be my ONLY reason to not let her get associated with others.

    Raj
     
  6. Nitha J

    Nitha J IL Hall of Fame

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    I have said No to playdate for chinnu despite several requests.
    Real reason:The other "mommy" is a heavy smoker. What I told her is "chinnu is afraid of cats""They have 2 cats":))) So kids plays outside the apartment.
    As I said before; if I am comfortable with the parenting style ; I wouldn't mind the kids to be on play-date.And being comfortable with each other requires a few preliminary meetups:))
    Off the topic :One thing I won't agree is to the concept of "sleepovers". Somehow I find it an un-necessary practise. Just curious to know how rest of you feel about it.
    -Nitha
     
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  7. Mahisneha

    Mahisneha New IL'ite

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    Thanks for all your wonderful suggestions. I can ask her mom to stay with them since this is a first time. It helps me to know well about her and her family. If I am comfortable, then I can allow my daughter for more play dates.
     
  8. suradha

    suradha New IL'ite

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    I have a 8 yr old and i do send him for play dates with American kids.He is very active and enjoys playing with them.If you are comfortable and know the parents i feel there is nothing in wrong having a play date.this is my view.
     
  9. Riyasmommy

    Riyasmommy Silver IL'ite

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    Nitha, I am totally against it too. You know what surprised me though, a couple of my american girlfriends are too!! They don't think there is any reason to do sleepovers, even at their best friends house. I am glad to know there are like minded moms out there, and I won't have to put up a fight with Riya when she insists on sleepovers. :thumbsup

    Raj
     
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  10. tikka

    tikka Gold IL'ite

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    Would you ladies believe that schools in Chennai are doing sleepovers? I am not sure I want that at all. They ask children over the age of 6 be left in the school camp overnight and picked up after breakfast. Not my time yet, but I am wondering if it is a common practice asking children to camp at that age?
     

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