PINK SHAWL AND PSYCHOANALYSIS (Fifth and final Episode ) By Sushi

My dear friends,

Can you believe – someone asking for the end of a story after nearly three years –Yes..Now Anjelin has done it . (I think my name need to be nominated for atleast Limca book of records for writing the final episode of the story after 3 years)

But should I take it as a bouquet or a brick ? Infact I should take it as a brick only because I failed to accomplish my commitment. Even though no excuse can justify the prolonged delay still I have to explain my position – Suddenly I was required to rush to Hyderabad to babysit my grand daughter as my daughter in law took up a new job. Moreover, even though I had carried my laptop , time and a peaceful environment which needed to complete the story were missing and by the time I got free, there was a gap of 6 months and I felt reluctant to post the end as I felt many would have forgotten the episodes. Yes , many of you would have forgotten and as good citizen I give below the link to the first four episodes. Thanks Anjelin for waking me up and supplying Oxygen to me.

1) http://www.indusladies.com/forums/stories-fiction/145782-pink-shawl-psycho-analysis-first.html

2) http://www.indusladies.com/forums/stories-fiction/145939-pink-shawl-psycho-analysis-second.html

3) http://www.indusladies.com/forums/stories-fiction/148870-pink-shawl-psycho-analysis-episode.html

4) http://www.indusladies.com/forums/stories-fiction/150378-pink-shawl-psycho-analysis-fourth.html

Now to the firth and final episode (would be happy to have your feedback my dear friends)

PINK SHAWL AND PSYCHOANALYSIS
(Fifth and final Episode )
* * * * * * * *
Radha just stood there - she never expected anything like this and was so shell shocked even to think or say what to do. As Swaminathan had already leftm she had to leave the room too and came out where all her colleagues were waiting for her. When, seeing her face, her colleagues started asking her was anything wrong, she just had to act calm and said she had a splitting headache in order to save the situation. Then they all started discussing about the next day’s program. Most of them had formed a group and made prior arrangements to see Taj Nahal and do some more sight seeing of nearby places like Fatehpur Sikri etc. They had invited Radha too but she had declined to join them as she wanted to see Taj Mahal with her husband Ramanathan only. Some had relatives in Delhi and they had decided a visit to them. Radha had earlier planned to do some shopping in Cannaught Place Market for her hubby in the two days before they all left for their respective places. But now she wished she had joined the group for Agra visit by which she could have had one valid excuse for not meeting Swaminathan. As they had arranged for a package tour, there was no scope for her to join them at the last moment. But then, when one part of her mind was very angry and not wanting to see him but the other part wanted to question him for his betrayal too.

Full night she could not sleep properly and morning she got up with a splitting headache. By the time she woke up, everyone had left and she just took her coffee alone in her room. While she was taking coffee, the reception called her to announce that a car has come to pick her up. Now, thinking, she had no other alternative except to go by what fate reserved for her, she told the reception that she will be ready in half an hour and to inform the driver accordingly.

She dressed up mechanically choosing a silk saree which was above on the pile of sarees and a matching blouse kept with the saree. She was ready in 25 minutes and was in the car as if she was in a trance. The driver saluted her and wished her ‘good morning, madam’ and started the car. All the half an car the car took to reach the destination, Radha was thinking as to what she will tell Swaminathan – whether she should be calm or she should show her true feelings to him etc. She was sure about herself that she had no love left for him. She loved her hubby Ramanathan so dearly and there was no place for Swaminathan anymoe in her mind. But she was confused and felt sort of guilty of meeting Swaminathan, the reason she did not know why.
The car stopped and she woke up from her thoughts. The car was standing in front of a big bunglow type of house with a guard to open the door. She did not know which place was it but as the door opened and the car stopped in front of the main door of the house, her heart started thumping faster. She did not even know how she will react when she is forced to meet him face to face. She also did not know whether his wife would be with him or not..All the thoughts were running so fast in her mind, she did not even realize the door was open and a simple not so beautiful lady was standing in front of her and talking to her.

Radha controlled her thought flow when she heard the lady welcoming her and holding her hands. She also reciprocated by holding her hands and giving her a weak smile inwardly thinking ‘if this is the lady for whom swaminathan ditched her, then he must have been blind or he must have had some hidden agenda’ - but her thoughts were again stopped by the sweet and kind voice of the lady telling her ,

“ ah! So you are Radha..Nath used to talk so much about you “ Radha was so dumbfounded hearing this – she started again thinking ‘ Nath must be Swaminathan and why was he talking so much about her “ etc etc. But then again her thoughts were interrupted by the voice telling her ‘ Radha – I am Mrs. Nath.. you may not know me but I know about you so much that I have been telling Nath to make us meet and talk – he has kept his promise but as he had to go to Airport to pick up some important person, he is not here to welcome you. But in a couple of hours he will be here and today being full moon day, we have planned a visit to TajMahal for you and our other guest too “ Radha started telling her about her desire to visit TajMahal only with her husband but she thought that can wait. She heard the lady telling “ you must not have taken your breakfast – I suppose - so let us finish our breakfast and then let us talk” .
Again Radha had the same feeling – “what Swaminathan had so much to talk about her to his wife. If the wife knows so much about her (Radha) then how she is so sweet to her husband’s ex lover” . But then she again kept her thoughts to herself and obediently followed the lady to the dining table which had a variety of dishes nicely arranged. Though Radha had no appetite as if her stomach was filled with her thoughts, still the sweetness with which Mrs. Nath served her made her feel at home and she took some idlies and upma too. Then coffee was served with Mrs. Nath telling her that she knew about all her tastes as conveyed by Swaminathan.

After coffee they came to the long veranda which had so many plants as well as a nice ‘Jhoola’ (Swing). Mrs. Nath took her hand and led her to the jhoola and they both sat. The jhoola was quite artistically designed and Radha was really taken back. They both sat and Mrs. Nath started talking first asking Radha to address her as ‘Samyukta or Sammy’ which she told was her maiden name. Radha smiled and somehow started liking her in spite of knowing that she was the one who took away Swaminathan from her. Somehow, Radha felt Samyukta was too good to do any harm to anyone and no one can dislike her however much they try. Samyukta was not at all beautiful, quite dark and plumpy and had a small limp in her right leg too. But her broad smile covered up all the shortcomings and the moment she smiled, radha felt even her enemy would start liking her ie if she had any ememies which was quite unlikely.

They talked and talked but most of the talking was done by Samyukta and at times Radha talked or replied a question asked by Samyukta – Samyukta told her how she found Swaminathan falling from the tram and took him to a nearby hospital where she was working as a nurse. Swaminathan was injured in the head and was in semi conscious stage for more than 3 months. Samyukta had only her father living with her as she had lost her mother when she was just 10 years old. She tried to search some friends of Swaminathan but she could not find anyone. In fact, she told Radha, that she could not even find his wallet whch might probably fell when he fell down from the tram and went into the hands of some urchins. As he had no one to take care of him. Samyukta and her father took care of him till he was in the hospital. Samyukta told Radha that swaminathan used to say only two words ‘amma and radha’ but she could not get anything more from him till he became totally conscious which was after more than three and a half months. By that time she had brought swaminathan to her home which had just two rooms and a kitchen. But she felt, she could not leave him till he regained his full consciousness and as she was working in that hospital only , the hospital authorities let her take him to her home and also were ready to wait for the payment of hospital expenses which were not too high, the hospital being a trust hospital. To cut the long story short, Samyukta told Radha that when he gained consciousness, he first worry was to find a job for himself. He was so shaken about the happenings and felt too depressed. He was even reluctant to talk to Samyukta or her father even though they tried to make him very comfortable. Samyukta said, he probably felt very low being forced to live in some unknown people’s house but had no other alternative too. He just used to take very little food and mostly spend his time outside as he had to get a job very badly. The company where he worked before his accident gave him two month’s salary as a good gesture but they could not hire him back.

Before his accident he was living in a one room tenement but as there was no news about him and the rent was also not paid, the owner broke open the lock and removed his meager belongings and gave away the tenement to another tenant on rent. Luckily, the owner did not throw away his belongings which was just a suitcase, few vessels and a bedding. But the most important was his certificates which were intact and luckily he could get a better job through his manager in his previous organization who had a soft corner for him and also felt little guilty about the dismissal.

After getting the job, Swaminathan wanted to shift to a different place but Samyukta’s father somehow convinced him to stay with them. Samyukta and her father had taken a liking to Swaminathan and knowing he had nobody in Kolkata to take care of him, they felt it is their responsibility to take care of him. Swaminathan still had not regained his original strength and felt both mentally and physically weak and wanted the company of someone. He agreed to stay with them on one condition that he will share the monthly expenses and Samyukta and her father agree readily knowing very well that if they don’t agree he will go back.

While all this was happening, Samyukta learnt later that, Swaminathan had written two letters to Vichu stating all the facts and enquiring about Radha. But by that time Radha was married and already left Mumbai and started living in Chennai. Vichu, directly came to Kolkata and explained everything to Swaminathan not hiding even one bit. When Swaminathan learnt Radha was married, he could not control himself. But Vichu explained to him how he was made to tell a lie that swaminathan was married and vichu also told him that any parent who wanted to marry their only daughter would have done that .

Vichu was to go abroad to continue his higher studies in a month’s time and more than 15 days he stayed with Swaminathan and made him understand it was nonon’e mistake that Radha got married. It was just fate that the accident took place and no one to be blamed. Radha particularly tried everything to convince her parents and only the lie that Swaminathan married someone else made her change her mind and marry someone. Swaminathan, though was pacified for that time, still became so restless, that Vichu got so worried and he explained everything to Samyukta and requested her to take care of Swaminathan. Samyukta told Radha that it took more than a year to make Swaminathan come out of the stage he was in. Samyukta in the meanwhile had made him join a evening course in phychology like she was doing. They both started going to college together and returning together and this started a different story behind their back.

In the meanwhile, Samyukta’s father had a severe heartattack which made him physically and mentally weak. He started fearing his end and wanted Samyukta to get married but when he started searching for a groom for her, the real difficulty started. First it was finance and then the talks about a man staying in their house. Even though samyukta was not a bit affected by these talks, but swaminathan was concerned and wanted to get out of their house. While they were discussing this and that suddenly Samyukta’s father said ‘Nath, why don’t you both get married’? Samyukta and Swaminathan both were shocked hearing this but in order to pacify Samyktha’s father they just laughed it off. Swaminathan just forgot about that suggestion but it was not the same case with Samyukta. She started noticing things about Swaminathan which she had not noticed so far. But she did not know how to go ahead in this matter as she very well knew about Radha and Swaminathan and she also knew Swaminathan was not able to remove radha from his mind. All this time, Vichu was keeping tabs of all the activities and was interacting with both of them and he also felt that Swaminathan’s life would settle once he marries Samyukta. To cut the long story short, the death of Samyukata’s father changed the total scenario. Vichu who was on vacation in India came to Kolkata on hearing the news of death of Samyukta’s father and somehow convinced Swaminathan to marry Samyukta reasoning that he cannot leave Samyukta alone and cannot stay with her too . Saminathan had no valid reason to refuse and he finally agreed for the simple marriage that took place soon after.

Samyukta told Radha, after marriage also Swaminathan still felt depressed and it was Samyukta who made him put all his mind in the course they were doing together and soon they graduated and shifted to Delhi. Samykta took up the post of psychiatrist in a hospital which was connected to her Kolkata hospital and Swaminathan joined the famous ‘B’ school and due to his hard work became the HOD sooner than they expected. Samyukta also told Radha that she encouraged Swaminathan to open up and tell her about his love for Radha. During the conversation, Samyukta talked about so many things – she talked about how Swaminathan came out of his shell to talk aout Radha, about how they met about how much he loved her etc etc. Samyukta also told Radha that the most difficult task was to make Swaminathan come out of the guilt feeling that even though Radha was married, he still could not stop thinking about her. Samyukta said to Radha ‘ see ..Radha .. what I said and made Swaminathan understand – I am also telling you and want to you to understand – ‘ Love is something so blissful that when you start feeling guilty or start hating the person whom you had loved so dearly – it just loses its blissfulness – Love is also a beautiful friendship between two individuals - rather a degree above good friendship – which needs to be cherished till you die. Just think like this - suppose a friend is away or no more – we never hesitate to talk or think about the friend – but then why we hesitate to talk about our love relationships? when you come out of the guilt feeling, you start seeing the goodness of having gone through such a blissful experience in life – so Radha ! I have made Swaminathan come out of the guilt feeling and we often talk about you and the college days when you were together – Now I know about your likes/dislikes and Swaminathan still has a special place for you in his heart but he has also kept another special place for me in his heart and also for his other friends as the heart is big enough to give space for others too – Radha –I would also tell you the same – when you are able to cherish your childhood friends and also able to discuss about them , then why not this special friendship too – so come out and be yourself – Swaminathan is your special friend and such friendships need to be respected and not to be felt guilty of”

Samyukta also told her “you must be wondering – why he acted as stranger during the whole course – He told me about you on the first day when he saw you in the class but then he also said that being the HOD, if he shows any recognition, it may create some ill feeling among other candidates . That is the reason, he invited you on the final day when your scores were already done – hope you understand”

Radha smiled at Samyukta and said “yes – after talking to you and hearing about everything – I really feel light hearted and waiting to see my dear college mate “ By that time the door bell rang and Samyukta got up saying ‘ ha ha – they have also come” Radha looked quizzingly at her but Samyukta winked and went to open the door. The door opened and there what she saw, Radha could not believe her eyes. With Swaminthan, there stood her husband Ramanathan smiling affectionately at her. Afterwards, she came to know that Swaminathan had taken her Chennai address and telephone/mobile details from the form she had filled in at the time of registration on the first day. Then he had talked to Ramanathan introducing himself as Radha’s college mate and had invited him Delhi with the suggestion that both families could visit Tajmahal together. Ramanathan had already known that Radha wanted to visit Tajmahal with him only and so he accepted the invitation immediately and as per wishes of Samyukta and Swaminathan who wanted to surprise Radha, did not inform Radha about his visit. Radha, her mind so light after her talks with Samyukta, was surprised at herself when she was able to talk to Swaminathan as if she was meeting a college mate after a long time. They all talked about their college days, lift at Delhi and Chennai and after lunch and they all left for Agra to see Taj Mahal.

They reached Tajmahal in the night and being full moon day, Tajmahal looked so beautiful but Radha felt disappointed. She had anticipated so much about Tajmahal but when it was in front of her eyes, she felt there was something amiss. Even though it looked beautiful but she felt she could feel some sadness emanating from inside. . She felt, even though Shah Jahan built Taj mahal to show his love for his beloved Mumtaj, it was still a tomb conveying to the world the death of Mumtaj. It would have been a ‘Happy Mahal’ she thought , if both Shah Jahan and Mumtaj had lived there;.

Her thoughts were abruptly stopped by the voice of Ramanathan who had all along been holding her hands as if he was meeting her after a decade of seperation . Same way Swaminathan was holding the hands of Samyukta as if to help her walking as they wandered around Tajmahal. She heard her dear hubby telling her “ Radha, it is getting cold and I had told you to keep your shawl in the handbag. Please get it out and wrap it – otherwise you will catch cold” Then she heard Swaminathan’s voice from behind ‘ yes, yes – that pink shawl na? It saved her during her psycho analysis test and Radha you should thank your hubby for asking you to keep that pink shawl in your bag’ and then came Samyukta’s oice mixed with laughter ‘ Nath – she has to thank you first because it was you who gifted the pink shawl to her “ Radha looked back at the Swaminathan who were joyfully chiding her and felt she was lucky to get such a nice friends. She looked coyly at Ramanathan when he affectionately adjusted the pink shawl around her..Now when she again looked at TajMahal, she felt the colour of Taj Mahal was changing light pinkish – she thought ‘ may be my pink shawl is vibrating with Taj Mahal “.

(Concluded)

Sushi

PS: If you find spelling mistakes and grammatical errors, please excuse. Sushi too getting old. (Please don't read Sushi is getting too old) btt

 

Dear Anjelin,

Infact I must thank you for motivating me to write the final episode of the story.
Now I am relieved of that nagging feeling that something is remaining unfinished
I suppose, you came like am Anjel for me.

thanks again.

sushi

 

Dear Aruna,

it feels so nice to hear such adorable words from such an eminent personality. Yes. Anjelin came as real Anjel for me to motivate and finish the final episode. I feel so relieved after that nagging/sort of guilty feeling when something you left unfinished.

Now that my grandchildren have grown a little and one son relocated to Singapore, we (me and my dear hubby) have chosen our nest in a senior citizen Resort yes Resore - I cant call it a home for two reasons. One, because of the lavishness it gives and second I don't feel 'at home' here in this abode. It is a nice place to live temporarily ie till you are hale and healthy , to be with your friends, do whatever you want .I have met my school mates from Mumbai here, have a lovely time and have time to write too. So I will write.

thanks again,

sushi

 

Thanks you Rajini for having the patience to read the long story and appreciating the same too.

It motivates me to write more and more.

Sushi

 

Suma,,

Thank yu very much. It makes me feel so happy