Learn to manage yourself first ! Personal management comes before personnel management. Everyone is a manager because management is involved everywhere, be it a house or office or family or friends. A manager is a leader and a leader must set an example. Gita says Yadacharathi sresthasatta devetaro janah Sa yatpramanam kurute lokasthadanuvartate 3.27 Whatever a leader does, another person does that very thing. Whatever he upholds as authority, an ordinary person follows that. A manager cannot afford to be lackadaisical and loose in value structure, because others will follow him. You should have love for whatever you do. If you are dissatisfied with yourself, you can never manage anybody. There are many reasons for one to be dissatisfied with oneself. You may have a complex about yourself. This is due to what we call internalising. All the time we think about what others would think of us. We must understand we are as much worth as we value ourselves. We must discover our self-worth in order to command respect. It is necessary to discover self-esteem first. We must care for the person whom we want to manage. Every person has to be won and we cannot win people by demand. We must genuinely care for that person. That calls for an understanding of the concept of duty and sanctity of work. Our culture gives importance to the concept of duty. Duties are more important than rights. There is nothing superior or inferior in duty. We must see the sanctity of work in any job, we manage. We must also appreciate the dignity of any work. We must make people feel they are understood. Money cannot buy a human being. If a person understands you, you discover self esteem or self respect. Atleast, you do not contribute to the self-disrespect of the other person. Everyone feels elevated in your presence. In fact there are only persons and not people. This recognition and managing persons is called personnel management. When we have relationship with people, management becomes natural. Thus we see that, for managing others, personal management is very essential ! I must remain free from internalising the situations. We must try to find methods to see that we do not get angry. The Gita describes anger as an enemy sitting in your own heart. An angry man is vulnerable. We must recognise that anger is a bad management and we must gain power over anger. If you recognise that you have no power over anger, pray to God to grant you serenity, composure and the poise to deal with situations objectively. To manage your anger is personal management which comes before personnel management. To sum up, your ability to manage others depends on your self-esteem, your self-worth. When you deal with other people, make sure that you do not cause any anxiety, any fear, any complex in the other person. Do not create a feeling in the other person that he or she is being judged by you. In your communication, see that the other person feels, she or he is understood. That is very important besides your being understandable. Every person has to be won and you cannot win peple by demand. Money cannot uy a human being. If a person is able to understand you, he or she gets a satisfaction. That person discovers a self-esteem, a self-respect. Everyone feels elebvated in your presence. This is an essential ingredient of pesonnel management. Care is not merely economic consideration; it is something that comes from an individual. It is essential to have an understanding of the concept of duty and sanctity of work. Lastly you manage your self by managing your anger, frustration etc, by being prayerful. With these, you will certainly be a good manager of yourself and the people you happen to mange. Love, Chithra.