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Perseverance

Discussion in 'Snippets of Life (Non-Fiction)' started by girvani, Jul 7, 2020.

  1. girvani

    girvani Platinum IL'ite

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    A day started with lots of apprehension and anxiety. As I took one deep inhalation and looked out at the window, raindrops were scattering and leaves in the tree were shining and made me feel that they were delighted to receive this blessing. When I glanced at the opposite side, the perfectly arched rainbow was shining through the rain and the refracted sunlight. Birds chirping was synchronized with the sound of the raindrops made me feel that they were accompanying each other in their journey.

    My thoughts were raising at lightning speed. I remembered a 10-year-old girl who was awestruck by her father and his student's achievement as his student just got admitted to the University of Oxford from a school from Jaffna in Srilanka. After seeing how the children were excelling in their academic pursuits I started dreaming of my future. I have planned out my future from the O/L to PhD when I was 11. Many of them enjoyed the childishness of me and many might have thought I am being clueless. But, I knew my father believed in me and so did I.

    Years passed, the civil war got intense, lots of school days were missed and I ended up in the refugee camp after my A/L. In the refugee camp, we got food once a day and if we are lucky twice day, bathroom facilities were restricted, and everything was rationed. But, that didn't bother me and my worry was whether am I going to miss my A/L exams? With swami's grace, I did prepare for my A/L's within 10 months instead of 24 months and got into the university. But life wasn't easy. I was living with my sister and mother in one city and my father and brother were in the home town.
    After graduation, many parents arranged marriage and sent me to the UK so that I can be safe. Living in a new country, where you do not know the language or culture and your husband and his family are very new is certainly a daunting experience. While I try to ground myself in the new world, I did get some extra qualifications and landed upon a job. I started working as a receptionist and moved up to a reservoir engineer. Then, as usual, a problem came as I couldn't conceive after losing my first baby. Even though it wasn't bothering me or my husband but it was for the family. I went through some 5 years trying to conceive and finally blessed with two boys with swami's grace. When our younger son was 8 months old, my husband decided to move to Qatar. Yet again, another journey, new country but this time with two children under two years. We lived there for three years and came back to the UK.

    In all these years, one thing hasn't changed in me was the dream of completing a PhD. As soon as my youngest started Primary 1, I enrolled at the University of Aberdeen to pursue my dream in October 2016. It wasn't an easy journey. While my fellow post-graduates will be in the uni working for more than 10 hours, I had 5-6 hours to work during school time. Then I have to take boys to various activities and look after them. I questioned myself whether am I doing enough or not, every day. Many people in the university didn't take me seriously as they thought I wouldn't last. But, my father's words of doing your best at everything kept me going feeling contended as I know I cannot do more than this. My priority is my children and I was realistic about that. The very first time, I left my boys and travelled to the USA for the experiments, it was a daunting another experience but we all learned from that and the second time around it became easier. Towards the end, when I started writing up my thesis, COVID-19 came and imposed an additional constraint on my day. I need to do online schooling with two boys, write up my thesis and to look after the household. I did that I have submitted my thesis with the help of my husband and the children. Then the waiting game started for the final Viva.

    A knock on the door brought me to the present moment, My older son came and told, Amma you have 30 minutes to go. I quickly went to my shrine, gave my pranams to swami and started my laptop and waited for the call while chanting. I was anxious and felt like crying. The call came and my examination was started. Next, two and a half hours was a pure gruelling process. I hold swami tightly and defended myself. In the end, yet again, they have asked me to wait for another five minutes while they made a decision. And the final call came and the main examiner said CONGRATULATIONS.

    Tears started flowing, I truly didn't feel anything except the gratefulness. My husband and boys were waiting outside the room and they were delighted to see me. My sons didn't understand the extent of these results. But they have seen me, how hard I worked in the last 3 years and 8 months. I am hoping the experience of this will teach them to do their best in whatever they do too. On the other hand, I am still recovering from the experience from yesterday. I thought and thanked all my teachers from my nursery days to now in my thoughts. It was the hardest journey but I can now see the importance of all the hurdles I experienced along the way. Everyone one of the struggles has taught me something very important. They do say that you need the help of the village to raise your child. You CERTAINLY need the village to help and the emotional support you if you are doing something for yourself on top of raising your children. I am lucky and blessed to have this.

    I thought of sharing this with you all as you were part of my journey too. I have learned many things from you all. Many of you are so warm towards me and encouraged and blessed me in many ways. Thank you all from my bottom of my heart.

    It always seems impossible until it's done.

    --Nelson Mandela (1918-2013)
     
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  2. latharamesh1964

    latharamesh1964 Bronze IL'ite

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    Dear Girvani,

    God bless with you with everything you deserve in life. Many congratulations on attaining the Doc Degree.
    Celebrate & Enjoy the moment for all the hard work you have put in !!
    Take Care !!

    Latha Ramesh
     
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  3. Viswamitra

    Viswamitra IL Hall of Fame

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    My Dearest Vani,

    What a journey this is for you! My heartiest congratulations to you for successfully defending your thesis. You are a perfect role model for your children to dream big and plan to achieve it systematically. None of the adversities such as COVID, responsibilities as mother and husband, the transition from country to country, etc. deter you from executing your dream. I lived 41 years in India (especially most of my years in Tamil Nadu) and I understand the conditions in refugee camps. Patience and perseverance are the key to someone like you succeeding in your dream. My best wishes to you and your family.

    Viswa
     
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  4. shyamala1234

    shyamala1234 Platinum IL'ite

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    Dear Vani,
    Hearty congratulations. You have achieved what you wanted. My best wishes are with you.
    Syamala
     
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  5. Srama

    Srama Finest Post Winner

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    Dear Vani,

    Heartiest Congratulations! I can only imagine your nervousness and the elation afterwards. You are a woman with a lot of grit and determination but more importantly, a lot of warmth. It always comes out in every interaction with you. I am very pleased Vani that you accomplished what you set out to. I am sure your parents and husband are very proud of you and your children while share the joy you feel, will understand better your accomplishment as they grow older. All the best to you and much love to your boys. Thank you for sharing this wonderful news with us here - celebrating you :beer-toast1:
     
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  6. Ragavisang

    Ragavisang Silver IL'ite

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    Hearty Congratulations on your achievement Girvani. Enjoy the precious moments. I can completely understand the influence of your dad in your life. Almighty bless your family with eternal happiness.

    My Dad gave me a gift(Poster) on my birthday (when I was a young kid) the saying on it was "Even in darkness Light dawns for those who believe". I remember this wordings whenever I face hardship in my life. Last week I was adventuring with Rock painting to get some positive energy .. Guess what I did... I painted the rock and wrote the exact wordings and kept it in my home office desk.
     
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  7. girvani

    girvani Platinum IL'ite

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    Dear Latha
    Thank you very much. I very much appreciate that.

    Vani
     
  8. girvani

    girvani Platinum IL'ite

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    My dearest uncle
    Thank you very much for being there for me and for blessing me. It means a lot.
    Vani
     
  9. girvani

    girvani Platinum IL'ite

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    Dear Shyamala
    Thank you very much. I very much appreciate that.
    Vani
     
  10. girvani

    girvani Platinum IL'ite

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    Dearest Sabitha
    Thank you very much. You are always kind to me and I very much appreciate that. My father is suffering from Parkinson’s for last 12 years and now he has almost lost his conscious. However when I told him the news he said ‘Happy Birthday’. I was thankful that he was able to wish me something.
    Thank you and love to you and your beautiful family.
    Vani.
     
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