Pathological Friendliness Is Linked To Missing Genes

Nonya · Jun 27, 2017

‘The Boy Who Loved Too Much’

This podcast (audio) and the review of a book "The Boy who Loved Too Much" describe the genetic deletion that results in a behavior that can only be described as pathological friendliness, labelled Williams Syndrome. The person with this genetic problem would want to be just too darn friendly with anyone, without reservations. The person would be too friendly to the point of being a pest, the subject of exploitation by others, as well as suffer rude responses from those who reject the friendly advances from a person with this Williams syndrome.

The article notes that one misses only 26 genes out of some 20000 in the human genome, so as to be afflicted with this too-friendly behavior. Those that have an extra copy of the 26 genes are expected to be anti-socials, and naturally a whole spectrum of the in-betweens in genetics and behaviors are possible.

I am skeptical, and suspicious of strangers. A very normal learned behavior. Everybody's mother teaches them how to behave with people we do not know. As well as keeping knees together when sitting.

I know someone (a woman in her mid 30's, single, and very friendly) who acts like she is playing with a few genes missing from a complete deck. She has had a few relationships, and magically the men vamoose after a couple of interactions. It has been hard to say no, when she invites herself to visit, offers various levels of help, and goes on and on in conversations when she is invited to a group party. I bet that everyone knows people like this. Perhaps, not necessarily a complete deletion of 26 genes, but perhaps only 20, or some other smaller number.

How do you deal with a person who is too darn friendly ?

BhumiBabe · Jun 27, 2017

Nonya said: ↑

‘The Boy Who Loved Too Much’

This podcast (audio) and the review of a book "The Boy who Loved Too Much" describe the genetic deletion that results in a behavior that can only be described as pathological friendliness, labelled Williams Syndrome. The person with this genetic problem would want to be just too darn friendly with anyone, without reservations. The person would be too friendly to the point of being a pest, the subject of exploitation by others, as well as suffer rude responses from those who reject the friendly advances from a person with this Williams syndrome.

The article notes that one misses only 26 genes out of some 20000 in the human genome, so as to be afflicted with this too-friendly behavior. Those that have an extra copy of the 26 genes are expected to be anti-socials, and naturally a whole spectrum of the in-betweens in genetics and behaviors are possible.

I am skeptical, and suspicious of strangers. A very normal learned behavior. Everybody's mother teaches them how to behave with people we do not know. As well as keeping knees together when sitting.

I know someone (a woman in her mid 30's, single, and very friendly) who acts like she is playing with a few genes missing from a complete deck. She has had a few relationships, and magically the men vamoose after a couple of interactions. It has been hard to say no, when she invites herself to visit, offers various levels of help, and goes on and on in conversations when she is invited to a group party. I bet that everyone knows people like this. Perhaps, not necessarily a complete deletion of 26 genes, but perhaps only 20, or some other smaller number.

How do you deal with a person who is too darn friendly ?
Click to expand...

I like friendly people. It gives me hope in the world. I find their inherent lack of self-interest very refreshing and makes me want to spend more time in their company (only if we had fun things to talk about). I have met people who are friendly, but I have no intention of continuing a conversation with them. If they are gifted with the gene to understand a person's discomfort, they will be kind enough to back off. If not, I humor them a little longer, since I don't want to intentionally hurt them - but use a white lie to escape further conversation.

Rihana · Jun 29, 2017

Nonya said: ↑

‘The Boy Who Loved Too Much’

This podcast (audio) and the review of a book "The Boy who Loved Too Much" describe the genetic deletion that results in a behavior that can only be described as pathological friendliness, labelled Williams Syndrome. The person with this genetic problem would want to be just too darn friendly with anyone, without reservations. The person would be too friendly to the point of being a pest, the subject of exploitation by others, as well as suffer rude responses from those who reject the friendly advances from a person with this Williams syndrome.
Click to expand...

The above description and the quoted article seem to say that Williams Syndrome is (only) a "social skills" kind of problem, but this link seems to list many other physical problems associated with it such as heart and blood vessel problems, slow weight gain, kidney, dental and musculoskeletal problems and much more. What is Williams Syndrome?

So, I will comment on over-friendliness as a general trait, not about people diagnosed with WS.

How do you deal with a person who is too darn friendly ?
Click to expand...

For me, too friendly people fall into two categories -- those who are quick to make friends, talk too much even when still hardly knowing the other person, share private matters easily, can't take a hint that you want to be let alone (for ever or a bit). Then, there is the other category -- those who are too helpful. Who overdo the 'help' others thing. Who help you even if you insist that they don't.

The overly friendly, I don't mind. Even welcome them, as I am not very outgoing and if the other person is not overly friendly, conversation is less likely to start. But the overly helpful kind, I can't stand.

It was enlightening to read about WS. I did feel a tad guilty as I briefly examined if I've ever met a person who might have had WS, and if so, was I kind or not to that person.